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WOMAN: 



HER DIGNITY AND SPHERE. 



BY A LADY. 




PUBLISHED BY THE 

AMEEIOAX TBAOT SOCIETY, 

150 HA8SAU.STBEET. NEW TOBK. 



3> Google 



EsTEEED aecordlDg to Act o! CongreaB, to the yeflr 1870, hy lie 
Amsbicis Tbaoi SociEn, in tie Clerk'a Office of tbo Btalrlct Conrt 



cjiGooglc 



L TmtLftilness paoe 21 

n. In Honor Preferring one Aaoilier 46 

ni. The Fear of Eiaicule 68 

rv. Home Duties 86 

V. What Shall We Bead? 109 

YI. What ShaU We Sing?- 124 

VII. The Friends that We Mate 135 

Vm. Self-denial 150 

IX. SeliooILife 160 

X. Habit 1T4 

XI. GonTeraaUon 18fi 

XII. H<ffipitality 190 

XUL Dress 212 

SIV. Amusements 232 

XV. DomesHo Relations ■ 253 

XVL Woman's Work in the Church 271 



cjiGooglc 



cjiGooglc 




WOMAN: 

HER DIGNITY AND SPHERE. 




IVING- iu an age of unpar- 
alleled activity, the capabili- 
ties and resources of man seem- 
ingly unlimited — an age of rev- 
olution, crowned heads swept 
into obscurity, and Liberty sitting at ease 
in the halls of despotism; old theories, 
as old dynasties; passing into oblivion ; 
new forms, new views, new ideas, new 
systems, new combinations coming and 
going, meeting and mingling — an age 
when the public mind is agitated with 



cjiGoogic 



strange and intricate questions ; the vital 
forces of good and evil waging a mighty- 
warfare ; speculation making bold advan- 
ces, imagination running riot with rea- 
son — an age when the legitimate rights 
and equality of the sexes are made the 
topic of the hour; when the dignity of 
woman is assailed, her sphere of action 
discussed, her motives suspected, her ca- 
pabilities analyzed, one crying out that 
she has too little to do, and another ask- 
ing, what more can she do ? — it becomes 
us to pause and ask ourselves, not for 
the purpose of discussion, but as the 
most simple and direct way of arriving 
at the truth, what part or lot have we 
in this advance movement? Are we 
standing at our posts, faithful in the ser- 
vice given us to do, valiant to do battle 
against wrong, or are we stragglers loi- 
tering behind, a prey to the enemy, a 
reproach to our Leader ? 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HEE DIGNITY AND SPHEEE. 7 

Examples are not wanting to show 
that a question simply put, has a t,en- 
dency to rouse into activity the faculties 
and affections of the mind, and not un- 
frequently, to change the purpose and 
the character. If the simple questions 
we incline to ask should lead a minority 
of our sisters to pause and reflect before 
they answer, the purpose that we have 
in view will be accomplished — the object 
of this little work fully met. 

But lest some one about to cross on 
the plank of expediency becomes con- 
fused and dizzy as she questions her own 
individual aim and purpose, asking with 
all humility, What can I do ? we would 
whisper, Nothing but what God has given 
you the ability to perform ; or in other 
words, Any thing that you can do, and 
do well. 

" God said. Let us make man in our 
image, after our likeness; and let them 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



8 WOMAN: 

have dominion — so God created man in 
his own imago, in the image of God cre- 
ated he him: male and female created 
he them." The singular and the plural 
here used, and likewise male and female, 
show equality, with essential differences 
of temperament and constitution, out of 
which must of necessity arise distinct 
characteristics and individual duties. 

It is with reference to these distinct- 
ive duties that speculations have arisen, 
and theories have been shaped, to puz- 
zle heads wise and unwise. We do not 
propose to map out for woman a new 
path, neither to combat nor annul popu- 
lar error. We would simply and unos- 
tentatiously hold up the pattern given of 
God, and wo would in all humility ask, 
Is this the standard to which womanly 
perfection is now verging, and by what 
means can the channel of her usefulness 
be deepened, her influence extended? 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



EEB DIONITX AND SPHERE. 9 

But I hear it whispered, ""Woman's 
duties have changed materially ; they are 
ien to one to what they were fifty years 
ago." Yet if her duties have increased, 
it does not change her nature, nor dim 
the lustre of her individuality ; she must 
act, necessity is laid upon her. And if 
woman is necessitated to exert herself, 
this necessity is known and permitted 
of God, and always for a wise purpose. 
Our heavenly Father does not require 
of his creatures what he has not given 
them the ability to perform. 

It is said with truth, that woman owes 
every thing to Christianity. In former 
times, among the lower classes, woman 
was little more than a beast of burden ; 
in the upper circles she was carefully 
guarded and tenderly treated, her beauty 
increased by the costliest robes and most 
brilliant jewels ; for her sake knights 
fought and champions died ; set up for 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



a prize she was won by the bravest : not 
as a companion, but as a choice posses- 
sion, to be jetted for a season and then 
laid aside. Where gospel privileges are 
not known, her position now is much the 
same, but where Christian influence is 
felt, she has ever been the first to ac- 
knowledge it; and while it has moulded 
and developed her to an equality with 
man, to be his adviser, his co-worker, 
his loved and loving companion, it has 
deprived her of none of her charms, but 
has, on the other hand, greatly increased 
them. Like all radical changes, this has 
been the work of time — a gradual eleva- 
tion of character and position ; and it is 
not yet perfected, neither will it be until 
the majority of thinking women realize 
that they are created for something more 
than enjoyment, understand something 
of tlieir own powers, and honestly strive 
to exert those powers to the full extent, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEE DIGNITY AND SPHEEE. 11 

in the fortimrance of truth and goodness 
in the world. 

It is a serious question, as the mother 
looks upon the little nestlings gathered 
at her knee, and asks, " What is the great 
object of a girl's education? What is the 
end and aim of her life ?" Looking upon 
our little ones, our thoughts running out 
into the unknown future, the question 
comes to us as mothers, Cannot we teach 
them that work is noble, that a true 
development of bodj and mind is the 
result of effort ; that enjoyment is never 
so satisfying as when it follows in the 
wake of duty ? Can we not teach them 
to be frank without being immodest; to 
be free without being extravagant; to 
be helpful without being patronizing; to 
be economical without stinginess ? Can 
we not teach them the higher law, with- 
out losing sight of the little amenities of 
social life — the charms and graces, the 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



little pleasant ways that render girlhood 
so lovely? 

The sculptor, in his studio, chips and 
chisels and moulds according to the ideal 
before him. The block of marble is to 
him something more than a block of mar- 
ble; he looks and studies, he thinks and 
feels, and realizes the presence of the 
angel there. He sees it, and he works 
incessantly, that he may reveal it to the 
gaze of others. Is it not thus as we look 
upon the lovely child committed to our 
care, an inhabitant of our workshop, to 
be moulded, shaped, polished? Every 
blow of the sculptor has a direct bearing 
upon the future, ho do'es not think to 
perfect his work in a day ; he chips and 
chisels, and studies his model — it is his 
life work ; his energies are taxed, his 
judgment brought into requisition, his 
entire being absorbed in bringing out 
and developing a form of loveliness fitted 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HEB DIGNITY ASD SPHERE. 13 

to awake and foster sentiments of pity, 
love, compassion, or high and lofty pur- 
pose in the heart of the beholder. A faint 
portraiture this of the mother's work, 
" line upon line, precept upon precept, 
here a little and there a little," mould- 
ing and shaping — while each word and 
look and act has a direct bearing upon 
the future — not a block of senseless mar- 
ble, but a human soul, the beauty or 
the deformity of which is to be devel- 
oped through her instrumentality. 

The sculptor does not fashion his block 
having a preconceived idea in his mind 
of the exact place and position whence 
it will be viewed : he aims to make it 
perfect, and this achieved, he knows that 
it will be fitted to inspire the beholder 
with the same sentiments ; that it will 
prove to be of value in any place or 
locality where it may be set up. 

In the education of our daughters are 



cjiGoogic 



we not to follow the same plan? We 
have no Inherited rights and inalienable 
possessions : fortunes arc unstable ; farm- 
ers become merchants ; artisans become 
lawyers ; laborers become judges and 
divines; rich men's daughters become 
the wives of poor men, and the reverse. 
Let education, therefore, be as broad 
and general as possible. Discipline, 
strength, knowledge, are useful in every 
position ; for herself should a giri be 
educated, not to make her a skilful mu- 
sician, an amateur artist, a passable lin- 
guist ; but to render her a strong, wise, 
sensible woman, with a firm, pure prin- 
ciple of right in her heart. Secure this, 
and she will grace any position, and be 
ready for every duty. 

But the objection has been made, and 
may be made again, that much study is 
not required of a woman. If it is need- 
ful for a boy to study, delving at Greek 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEE DIGNITY AND SPHERE. 15 

and Latin roots; searching through the 
labyrinths of metaphysics, tangling his 
brains with mathematics ; dissecting, ana- 
lyzing, and discussing, for the sole pur- 
pose of training and strengthening his 
intellect, laying the foundation for a no- 
ble manhood, is it less necessary that his 
sister should have the benefit of study 
and discipline, to fit her for a noble 
womanhood? Ought a sister, wife, moth- 
er, to have less discipline for the battle 
of life, than a brother, son, husband? 
Does any one fear that the woman, eat- 
ing of the tree of knowledge, will become 
too wise, discerning good and evil? 
Knowledge with love, puffeth not np, 
neither is it unseemly: rightly educate 
a woman, and there is little danger of 
her falling into forbidden paths. It is 
the smatterer that becomes giddy and 
falls. Compact knowledge, like the bal- 
last in a ship, leads to security. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



Neither will the like amount of study 
render the girl masculine, any more than 
it will render the boy effeminate. Let 
the sister and the brother take the same 
college course, and through the length 
and breadth of daily study and research, 
the characteristics of each will be mani- 
fest. Mental development will not be 
the same, any more than physical habit 
and formation ; the one still a girl, light, 
graceful, loved, the other shy, backward, 
and ill at ease, his boyishness a more 
ungrateful garment than his sister's girl- 
hood. 

The word education covers more than 
a college course, however. In the years 
usually given to study, lessons are learn- 
ed from the surroundings and circum- 
stances of life, as well as from books. 
The sculptor, in the beginning, makes 
broad lines and chips freely, but as he 
advances he is more cautious; a deep 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



SEE DIGNITY AND SPHEllE. 17 

cut will mar his work ; he looks closely ; 
the glancing of his chisel a hair's breadth 
will change the espression, the slightest 
deviation will aifect the success of all 
his toil. Thus, while books and the dis- 
cipline of study are needful, answering 
to broad lines and free chippings, mould- 
ing and giving shape, the expression is 
the effect of right principle continually 
exerted and never lost sight of; the out- 
growth of home influence, without which 
mere books will not suffice to educate. 

Another object in study is thorough- 
ness i an aim and a purpose, practical 
and available if need be. Life is uncer- 
tain ; the brightest hopes may fail ; the 
most flattering prospects elude our grasp. 
A thorough understanding of branches 
pursued will be so much capita!, profita- 
ble under any circumstances, and sure 
to be a source of satisfaction if the skies 
are dark and lowering. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



18 WOMAN: 

It is not uuusual to hear it said oi 
woman, that she lacks aim, going with 
the tide, drifting, swayed, beaten, with- 
out well-directed purpose. If this is so, 
is it not the effect of education? Can 
we .not, as mothers, correct this tenden- 
cy in our own daughters ? Cannot we 
teach them that it is as disreputable for 
a woman to be listless, idle, aimless, as 
it is for a young man to have no regular 
business. 

If this reproach is and has been true 
in the main, there are and have been 
manifold wives and mothers that have 
nobly stood at the helm, braving the 
storms of life, and eventually landing 
their precious cargo in a safe harbor. 
AU honor to such women, the meed of 
a higher praise awaits them than we can 
give. Our aim is to swell the number 
of those who find it their highest delight 
to mould and polish the jewels commit- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HEE DIGNITY AND SPHERE. 19 

ted to their trust, working and waiting 
for results sure to come in the higher 
life attained, the noble manhood and 
womanhood of their children. Could an 
angel ask higher service than God him- 
self has given woman, permitting her to 
be the sharer and co-worker with man, 
hastening the end for which he toils, sus- 
taining him by her counsel, strengthen- 
ing him by her love, making his home a 
resting-place, whence he is to emerge 
with armor bright and glistening. 

Many a young man has been saved to 
himself and to the world by the gentle 
ministrations of a loving sister. Many 
a father saved from despair by the time- 
ly aid of a daughter on whom he had 
bestowed a careful culture, one who had 
so improved her privileges, that when 
the dark hour came she was able and will- 
ing to aid him in his business, and by 
this means secure to him a home in his 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



age and helplessness. There are others 
■who cheerfully stifle every thought of 
self, giving themselves to incessant toil 
in order to educate and bring up a fam- 
ily of orphan brothers and sisters. The 
records of such lives may not be made 
manifest here, but th^y are bright in 
heaven. 

It is no doubt to teach us what woman 
is capable of doing, that so many shrink- 
ing, sensitive ones are left to do for them- 
selves and for others. We should never 
Itnow the beauty of the stars but for 
night and darkness ; and woman's nature 
cannot be seen in all its beauty, until 
the winds of adversity have blown away 
the tinsel and glare by which she was 
surrounded. Diamonds are found in sol- 
itude, and the jewels of the mind only 
become more precious when viewed by 
themselves, independent of their setting. 

Should it not be the aim of woman to 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HER DIGNITY AND SPHERE. 21 

use her abilities to the best purpose in 
whatever position God has placed her, 
using her privileges as stepping-stones ; 
lifting up *her own life and generously 
aiding others, who, perchance have not 
received as bountifullj? In view of 
hei" individual accountability, ought not 
every woman to let her influence reflect 
only the true, the beautiful, and the good, 
doing whatsoever her hands find to do ; 
thinking it the highest honor to be a 
woman, a mother, to fashion, to juould, 
and to polish jewels for the kingdom of 
her God? And still, as mothers, is it 
not necessary that our minds be stirred 
in reference to the homely lessons need- 
ful every day, simple and unpretending,' 
but all-important, the groundwork of all 
that is noble and good here, of all that 
is bright and glorious hereafter? 



cjiGooglc 





Truthfulness. 

^T is said of one of the ancient 
kings, that he had a mirror into 
■which he was accustomed to look, 
■"Vhon called to decide upon im- 
portant matters connected with 
his government and the well being of 
his people. It was well for this ancient 
king, and well for his people, that he 
was blessed with a mirror, the simple 
looking into which enabled him to dis- 
pense justice, to decide with wisdom, and 
to dictate such laws as should be for the 
furtherance of the public good. "We are 
not told that any one but the king was 



cjiGooglc 



TEUTHFULNESS. 23 

in possession of such a treasure. Unlike 
the people under this ancient king, such 
a mirror has been given to each one of 
us — a mirror of truth that reflects the 
way and the manner so perfectly, that 
by looking into it in all cases in which 
a decision is to be made touching our- 
selves, or in reference to others, we are 
enabled to know our duty. 

Such a treasure is given to us moth- 
ers ; and if the possession caused the 
heart of the old king to rejoice, how 
much more do our hearts overflow with 
gratitude — as wo look into the sweet 
child faces committed to our keeping, 
and think of our responsibility with re- 
gard to them— to be able to inquire of 
it continually, "How shall we order the 
child? How shall we do unto him?" 

Looking into the mirror of God's word, 
we find that first impressions are last- 
ing. With our little ones clinging to 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



24 WOMAN. 

our knees, we look into this mirror and 
find that children were brought to Christ 
by their mothers, that He blessed them, 
and said, "Suffer little children to come," 
meaning that they were to come through 
all time. "We see the mothers leading 
up their little ones to be blessed of God, 
and thus we are taught to lead up our 
children for his blessing, even when they 
are babes in our arras drawing nourish- 
ment from our bosoms. Neither is it 
sufficient to lead them to Christ; they 
must be taught, trained for hira, " that 
our sons may be as plants grown up in 
their youth ; that our daughters may be 
as cornerstones, polished after the simil- 
itude of a palace." This process of pol- 
ishing is essentially the mother's. The 
character of the child is yet unformed, 
the smooth tablet of the heart is free of 
outward impression. What characters 
are to be written there ? What impres- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



TEUTHFULNESS. 25 

sions made? What influences brought 
to bear upon them ? 

Holding up the mirror, we are enabled 
to see that TRUiHFULPfEss is the first les- 
son to be written there. By this we do 
not mean the merely opposite of what is 
false, but the truth in all things, accord- 
ing to their capacity to receive it. Let 
them see from the outset, that "life is 
real, life is earnest," and that "death is 
not the goal." " Even a child is known 
by his doings, whether his work be pure, 
and whether it be right." How sweet 
to feel the little clinging fingers, the se- 
rious look that creeps over their rosy 
dimpled faces, as they make an attempt 
to look for themselves into this wonder- 
ful' mirror. Children are strangely imi- 
tative; what they see others do, that 
they are inclined to attempt. The little 
girl just beginning to totter over the 
floor, presses her doll to her bosom, 



cjiGooglc 



hushes and rocks it precisely as she has 
seen her mother or her nurse hush the 
baby sister. To play with dolls is in- 
nate and perfectly natural ; some one 
says she cannot help it. True, it is in 
keeping with her nature ; but a phase of 
her nature that would not have devel- 
oped itself. Had she not seen it done, 
she would not have originated it. 

Not alone nursing dolls, but in "ma- 
king believe to keep house," the little 
girl uses the look, walk, and manner, 
using the very words : small things, it 
may be said, but the very things that 
go to prove the necessity, as mothers, 
of being true to ourselves, true to our 
principles, our love of the good and the 
beautiful reflected in the lives of our lit- 
tle ones. An eminent divine was once 
asked how old a child must be before 
there was reasonable hope of its being a 
Christian. "Age has nothing to do with 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



TKUIHrULNESS. 27 

it," was the answer; "love to Jesus, 
trust, repose, confidence, are all qualities 
that agree with the child's nature. As 
soon as the child can understand to love 
and trust his mother, then can he love 
and trust Jesus. As the Friend of his 
mother, Jesus will be his friend, loved 
and honored." 

Is not this true ? And if true, can we 
be too careful? These little imitators 
looking to us morning, noon, and night, 
bowing with us in supplication, we need 
Grod's blessing on each act, as well as 
on the food we eat — making our reli- 
gion practical in our homes, with nothing 
dark, cold, and stern, but warm, loving, 
genial ; looking to Jesus as a personal 
friend, leaning upon him, talking with 
him and of him just as we talk with and 
of a beloved earthly friend, going to him 
in times of trouble, in sorrow, and dis- 
. tress ; making him the sharer of our joy, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



the one in whom we think, and move, 
and feel, the Beloved whose presence is 
the joy of our souls. 

AVe all know how easy it is for our 
children to love their relatives, grand- 
parents, uncles, aunts, cousins ; the little 
reverential air on their laughing faces, 
as they take the letters in their chubby 
fingers, kissing the pictured semblance 
of the distant loved one ; sending messa- 
ges as we write, asking questions, and 
interested to the forgetfulness of play. 
"Would this be so if they were less imi- 
tative, less inclined to do as we do, to 
trust as we trust, to love as we love ? 
And if this is so, cannot we incline them 
to love with an abiding love things love- 
ly and of good report ? 

Is it not a mistake to think a child, 
because he is a child, must be petted, 
fondled, and put aside as a toy ; or eluded 
as a hinderance, an obstacle in the way 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



TRUTHFULNESS. 29 

of enjoyment? AH the while the little 
active brain is drinking in knowledge ; 
and the heart is like a roll of spotless 
canvas on which pictures are to be 
painted, if not by the mother, then by 
the hand of another, for pictures will be 
there. 

A mother, whose daughters were the 
pride and the ornament of her house, 
being asked what was the secret of her 
success in the education of her children, 
replied : ' ' From the first time I held them 
in my arms, I endeavored to make theifi 
my friends, my companions as well as 
my children. I let them see my love 
for them, my interest in them ; I studied 
their habits, character, temperament ; 
how to benefit them was the one aim of 
my life. Loving Jesus, I taught them 
to love him, and in all our daily inter- 
course I was careful to be true to my- 
self, true to my Christian profession, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



faithfully striving in ray owu life and 
walk to set them an example that they 
could safely follow." 

The Bible says: " Train up a child in 
the way he should go, and when he is 
old he will not depart from it." Child- 
hood is the time to lay foundations. Prin- 
ciples of truth implanted in the heart of 
a child must have an effect upon his fu- 
ture. Samuel was given to God in his 
infancy; Timothy was taught from a child 
to fear the Lord; "the unfeigned faith 
which dwelt first in thy grandmother 
Lois, and thy mother Eunice ; and I am 
persuaded that in tbce also." 

In this Paul gives us to understand 
the teaching given to Timothy, and the 
fruits of it as seen in his life — " the un- 
feigned faith." If truthfulness is incul- 
cated, there must be nothing feigned, no 
deception, however harmless it may be 
at the time considered. An English di- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



TBUTHFULNESS. 31 

vine beic^ at tie house of a lady who 
was desirous of spending the evening 
with a friend, overheard her planning 
how to deceive her little daughter, so as 
to have the satisfaction of knowing that 
the child was asleep before she left the 
house. "I will jnst put on my cap and 
lie down beside her, and she will think 
that I am going to sleep." 

"Madam," said the clergyman, as the 
lady appeared before him, " would you 
like your little daughter to grow up a 
liar?" 

The abruptness of the question, as well 
as the horror connected with the thought, 
caused the lady to burst into tears. 

"Oh, no, sir ; it would kill me to have 
ray child become such a character." 

"Then do not set her the example. 
If you deceive her now, what security 
have you that she will not deceive you 
when she comes to act for herself?" 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



"I had not thought any thing of this 
kind ; my child is so young," stammered 

the lady, 

"Young as your child is, she is old 
enough to know the difference between 
reality and pretence. Do not permit 
your child to learn deception from her 
mother." 

The expression of the face not unfre- 
quently gives the idea of deception as 
readily as words, saying one thing and 
looking another. If we would bring up 
our daughters to be as "cornerstones, 
polished after the similitude of a pal- 
ace," we must not weaken their faith, 
and dim the lustre of their confidence in 
us, by the use of deception in word or 
deed. 

Looking into this mirror continually, 
keeps bright the links of parental re- 
lationship ; each child a special gift, a 
trust from God, an immortal mind to be 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



TEUTHFULNESS. 33 

developed, a heart to be cultured, a soul 
to be fitted for the service of God here, 
au inhabitant of heaven hereafter. Pry- 
ing little eyes looking into out-of-the- 
way corners, now is the time to set be- 
fore them all lovely pictures. How sweet 
it- is to see the light of an awakened 
understanding breaking over their glee- 
ful faces, the curious gaze deepening into 
absolute wonder. Now is the time to 
make the impression, stamping in truth- 
fulness what the favor and glitter of life 
can never destroy. No after power is 
superior to the influence of a mother in 
infancy. It is from us that the child 
receives the most abiding and far-reach- 
ing impressions. 

In view of this,, can we look into the 
mirror too frequently? Can we consult 
it too careful!}', studying the require- 
ments laid down in His word, suiting 
them in measure to the infant capacity, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



line upon line, precept upon precept? 
"Thou shalt teach them diligently unto 
thy children, and shalt talk of them when 
thou sittest in Ihy house, and when thou 
walkost by the way, and when thou liest 
down, and when thou risest np." Again, 
" Bring them up in the nurture and ad- 
monition of the Lord." Plainly then, 
this is a personal duty, a duty that it is 
the privilege of the mother to take to 
herself. Blessed privilege ! to sit with 
our children on our knees, stringing 
pearls and weaving cloth of gold, to be 
fashioned and worn after we have passed 
away. Starry eyes, dimpled mouths and 
chubby clinging fingers, jewels given for 
our adorning, will ye ever be more beau- 
tiful, more dearly prized? Which of us 
can forget the thrill of happiness when 
invested for the first time with the sa- 
cred name of mother! Is there a joy 
on earth to equal it ? Is there a glory 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



TEUTHFDLNESS. 35 

to be compared to it? Is there place or 
position for which she would exchange 
it? 

This joy, that floods our souls as the 
great sea fills the laughing pools that 
dimple the rocky shore, is to be reflected 
in the bright, genial home: making it a 
paradise for our children, its daily beau- 
ty to outshine what may be found out- 
side. To realize this, great expenditure 
is unnecessary. Magnificent dwellings, 
large rooms and costly furniture, do not 
of necessity make a happy home. My 
neighbor over the way has all these, but 
there are no little pattering footsteps in 
her hall, no silvery voices to waken her 
in the morning, no ringing laughter to 
echo through the stately rooms, no glee- 
ful little faces, no loving hand -clasp, 
no white, dimpled arms to cling around 
her neck. My neighbor keeps her car- 
riage, and down the marble steps she 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



36 WOMAN. 

floats in silks and laces ; the prancing 
bays and glittering carriage make a 
pretty show ; and holding my baby up 
to look, she laughs and crows, patting 
my face, and murmuring, "Mamma." 
My neighbor looks and sighs. I know 
she 'd give it all to feel the little cling- 
ing arms about her neck, the tiny rose- 
bud mouth pressed to her own. What 
care I for silks and laces ! my gown is 
neat and trim, my collar white and 
smooth — and my baby, my crown, my 
pearl, my jewel, outshines my neighbor's 
wealth. 

Two gardeners my neighbor keeps, 
with ample grounds full of rare plants 
and sweetly perfumed flowers. Statues 
gleam through the rift of leaves, and 
fountains flash, with marble basins cu- 
riously carved and rimmed ; gravelled 
walks, and cool, delicious arbors starred 
with blossoms, invite the rich man and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



TKUTHPDLNESS. 37 

his wife to walk at sunset. The sun- 
shine slants across the costly dwelling, 
and falls upon our humble home : the 
talk grows less ; ray boy, my prince puts 
up his blocks, and lays his books aside ; 
'tis most time for papa; while Margaret 
climbs to the window ledge, and holding 
my baby high, we look and wait for the 
first step. Hush ! he comes ; the baby 
.springs and gurgles ; the sunshine falling 
on the rings of soft brown hair, her blue, 
laughing eyes lost in glee. This world 
holds not a lovelier face ; and down the 
walk rings the gleeful shout, "Papa has 
come !" The hahy is on his shoulder, with 
Jem and Margaret clinging to his hand. 

Across the way, my neighbor looks 
and sighs; I kno.w she'd give it all to 
take my place, to lean as I do on this 
firm, strong arm, and romp with children 
up and down the walk. 

The sun has gone to bed, and the chil- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



38 WOMAN. 

flren kneeling in their long white gowns, 
have made their little prayer. The white 
lids cover the laughing eyes, and the 
pink-tinged cheeks grow lovelier in re- 
pose. Priceless jewels ! and sinking on 
my knees, I cannot but ask only more 
earnestly, that He will show me how to 
fashion and to polish them according to 
His will. 

Withal, a genial homo and parents' 
care is not enough to polish cornerstones. 
Other influences must be brought to bear; 
a wise correction and a mild rebuke. 
" Correct thy son and he shall give thee 
rest: yea, he shall give delight unto thy 
soul." 

Mindful that look, word, and act are 
reflected truthfully, we are also to bear 
in mind that the occasions, the silent in- 
fluences of our homes are educators. The 
taste of our children depends more upon 
the combination and arrangement of col- 



cjiGoogic 



TKOTHFULNESS. 39 

ors than we are usually aware. The 
plates in our picture-books, the figures 
on the wall, the pattern of the carpet, 
the hangings at the window, each has a 
part in moulding and forming : if not so, 
how do we account for preferences too 
strong for modern fashion to overcome? 
Said a gentleman, "I like to see a mar- 
ried lady, with a pretty, tasteful cap — 
I cannot remember when my mother did 
not wear one — and I cannot reconcile 
myself to a matron in plain hair, any 
more than I could to a young lady in 
her teens with her hair covered." Said 
another, "My mother always wore her 
dresses cut low, with a spencer or un- 
derhandkerchief, the prettiest fashion 
that a woman can wear, in my estima- 
tion." 

Very few artists but go back to the 
time they hung about the mother, for 
the inspiration with which they have 



cjiGooglc 



evoked beauty for a world to admire. 
If we question our own hearts, we shall 
no doubt find that taste was in a great 
measure formed before we left the nur- 
sery, proof positive of the permeating 
principle in a mother's influence. "West 
tells us that it was the approbation of 
his mother that made him a painter. 
From time immemorial the encourage- 
ment of a mother has been a power to 
shape and fashion, little less than divine. 
When our children grow out of our 
arms, like young birds just learning to 
fly, one of the most delightful places to 
lead them is into the garden and the 
meadow, with the birds, the bees, and 
the blossoms for companions ; teaching 
them lessons of His love, showing them 
the flower-cups, and telling them by 
whose hand they were veined and paint- 
ed, the spicy fragrance going up from 
the flowers in gratitude. The birds sing 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



TKUTHFULNESS. 41 

of His goodness, the bee murmurs his 
praise, and little children must love God. 

"God makes them sing, mamma," says 
Margaret, hovering over the violet bed ; 
"God makes Jem and me and baby 
sing; he's a good God, mamma." And 
why not ? Why must God be an abstract 
power? Why must heaven be so cold, 
so far off to our children ? Not unless 
we choose to have it so. These little 
fluttering hearts are quick to learn who 
are our friends ; they know the form and 
figure of the one we love best. If God 
is our Father, and Jesus is our dear 
Elder Brother, they will know it; and 
as they love us, so will they love those 
whom we love. 

Not alone from the flower cups, the 
birds, the bees, and the blossoms, do 
we spell lessons suited to their capacity; 
but the tiny seeds wo scatter, like the 
little words we plant in their hearts. 



cjiGooglc 



take root, to bud and blossom after many 
days. There is no sham about nature, 
no pretence ; her influences are pure, 
and her teaching is always elevating. 
True to herself, she fulfils all her prom- 
ises ; trusting hor she does not betray 
that trust ; the nearer we approach, the 
more we see in her to admire and to 
love. A precious privilege, to lead our 
loved ones through her arched galleries ; 
to look upon their rapt faces, as for the 
first time they listen to the great organ 
chant in her mountain temple, drinking 
in the inspiration of her morning and 
evening hymns ; their little hearts swell- 
ing with love, their sweet voices tuned 
to praise and thanksgiving. Pleasant to 
listen to the children's questions, while 
gathering Sowers, and binding them with 
long feathery grass. 

"God made 'em for us, mamma; He 
thought we'd like 'em, maybe;" and 



cjiGooglc 



TRUTHFULNESS. 43 

clinging to my neck witli her white, dim- 
pled arras, my pearl, my "day's eye" 
talks of the heaven of which she has 
been told, the glittering gates and walls 
of jasper invisible ; and still it seems so 
real to my child, that a sigh will come, 
unworthy and swept back. I would not 
have her love heaven less, nor grow to 
feel it farther off than she does now. 

Another phase of truthfulness is accu- 
racy, not a set form of speech, a studied 
manner, the sweet vivacity kept down 
with square and rule, but just the truth, 
giving the shade and measurement of an- 
other's speech. Children are more or 
less imaginative, fond of the marvellous, 
and liable to run wild, as roses in a wil- 
derness of pink bloom. A judicious pru- 
ning, a gentle lopping off is required, if 
we would have a living, active, harmo- 
nious growth. A hero to himself, the 
boy's I's come in too quickly for knowl- 



cjiGoogic 



44 WOMAN, 

edge to keep pace. A gentle training as 
we curl and twist the clambering vines, 
leading, not deadening, will throw the 
strength of brain into a strong aftergrowth. 

The sun bridges the window with bars 
of gold ; mirth is toned to a gentle seri- 
ousness ; grasping her flowers, Margaret's 
blue eye turns homeward, and lifting 
my baby from the wealth of blossoms, I 
walk slowly. The sky bends over us in 
benediction, the earth sends up her ves- 
per hymn, the air is full of love. Up 
the street stands the vine-wreathed cot- 
tage ; the sunshine slants across the roof; 
my neighbor opposite is at the gate ; the 
prancing bays clamp their silver bits. 

A pretty turnout, but baby fails to 
see it; she has caught the trick from me, 
her papa says. No matter where, my 
baby is quick-eyed. "Ah, yes, 't is papa, 
papa," echoes Jem, as another figure ap- 
s ; and Margaret well nigh throws 



cjiGoogic 



TRUTHFULNESS. 45 

down her flowers in the blithe run to 
see which will be first to welcome hiiii ; 
while baby laughs and crows, and clasps 
her dimpled pink-tinged haods. "VVe can 
afford to wait, our time will come— has 
come. My prince of men! not all my 
neighbor's wealth could make me feel as 
proud as I do now, with the great bronzed 
face so full of tenderness, looking into 
mine, the strong, firm hand on which to 
lean, the tender, loving voice, with ques- 
tions of the day. 

The gate is won, the burnished tem- 
ple with the flower-wreathed door, and 
we the worshippers. "God is a good 
God, mamma." "A good God is our 
God," echoes through our hearts, and 
bending with our babes, we once more 
ask that truth and love may blend and 
work within us, making our Jives fruitful 
in good deeds. 



cjiGoogic 





"In Honor, Preferring One An- 
other." 

^HESTBRFIELDbasdefined 

' politeness to consist in benevo- 
lence in trifles ; in other words, 

an unselfish interest in others. 

Looking into the mirror of God's 
word, we find, "As ye would that men 
should do to you, do ye also to them 
likewise ; in honor, preferring one an- 
other.'' In no place or position is this 
rule more essential than in the family, 
and in no place, perhaps, is it more often 
neglected or ignored. It would seem 
the little kindly acts of daily life would 



cjiGooglc 



"PEEFEKBING ONE ANOTHER." 47 

be the natural outgrowth of the sacred 
bond that unites the household; yet there 
is, but too frequently, a certain boorish- 
ness that grows upon those connected 
by family ties, a strange forgetfulness of 
the little amenities of social life ; allow- 
ing the manner to grow cold and rough, 
a scale of indifference under which the 
fire of love must burn brightly to be 
seen at all. 

In most cases, no doubt this is done 
thoughtlessly; the husband taking it for 
granted that his wife has full confidence 
in his affection, unthinking that a fire 
never fed, must, as a matter of course, 
sooner or later go out. The wife, occu- 
pied with her duties as a wife and moth- 
er, grows unmindful of the morning cour- 
tesy and the evening welcome. So busy 
preparing something to eat and some- 
thing to wear, that she is excusable per- 
haps ; but then, was it a stranger going 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



out and coming in, she would most assu- 
redly have remembered tliat courtesy 
demands it; but it is her husband, and 
the good woman forgets that this may be 
the beginning of a breach through which 
the arrow will speed to her own heart. 

It is often said that politeness costs 
nothing; and certainly in the family and 
out of it, it is a power to soften and do 
away with a thousand ills. The hand- 
clasp given to the stranger is but an act 
of politeness ; the smile of recognition 
to the timid and the sorrowing is to be 
ascribed to the same benevolent prin- 
ciple : putting ourselves in the place of 
the stranger, and extending the same 
courtesy to him that we would wish ex- 
tended to us. 

Uniform politeness is one of the cor- 
nerstones in the Christian character; 
" doing as we would be done by ;" "kind- 
ly affectioned one to another;" "courte- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



"PEEFEEEING ONE ANOTHER." 49 

oug, given to hospitality :" "bear ye one 
another's burdens, and so fulfil the law 
of Christ." To be thus minded- is not 
the work of the flesh, but of the Spirit ; 
qualities not inherent to our sinful na- 
ture, but grafted on it through the influ- 
ence of Divine teaching. As in every 
organization of imperfect beings forbear- 
ance and a kind consideration are need- 
ful, toning down prejudice, smoothing out 
the warp of preconceived opinion, blend- 
ing and harmonizing temperaments and 
characters diverse and diiferently form- 
ed, so in the family a uniform politeness 
is necessary. It is the golden clasp in 
the chain of love, drawing the links 
closer and closer every day. 

Looking into .the mirror, we find, 
" Whatsoever things are lovely, whatso- 
ever things are of good report," that do 
and teach. If pditeness is needful in 
the family, we must practise it; if we 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



50 WOMAN. 

desire to see our children courteous io 
their bearing to each other and to stran- 
gers, we must teach them to become so. 

Said one lady to another, as they con- 
versed in the drawing-room of a friend : 

"I regret that I cannot send Annie 
to dancing-school. At home she has no 
one but her brothers to associate with, 
and boys are so rude." 

"Do you think that going to such a 
school will have a tendency to rectify 
rudeness at home?" asked the lady. 

"I should send her there to learn 
politeness, and then perhaps her broth- 
ers will not teaze her so dreadfully as 
they do now." 

" If you feel that it is not best to send 
Annie this winter, I think I can furnish 
you with a code of politeness, the study 
of which would rectify rudeness in every 
instance," continued the lady. 

" If you will be so good, it will great- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



"PKEFERKING ONE ANOTHER." 51 

]y oblige me. Pray, where can I find 
it?" 

"The only code of politeness that wiil 
produce radical effect on the home-life, 
is found in the Bible: the every-day 
practice of its teachings, with the uni- 
form spirit it inculcates, will insure po- 
liteness in every place, and under what- 
ever circumstances," was the answer. 

Said another, "I consider myself fortu- 
nate in a nursery governess; she speaks 
French prettily, and her manners are 
quite Parisian." 

I would not underrate speaking French 
lirettily, neither would I object to the 
manners of nursery-raaid and governess 
being refined and lady-like ; but is this 
the chief requisite ? Are there not in- 
trinsic qualities that are to be looked 
for in those who assist us in the care 
and education of our children? Must 
we not feel a confidence that springs 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



52 WOMAN. 

from qualities of heart and mind, formed 
after the teaching and the Spirit, under 
whose rule we wish our children to be 
taught? A parrot can be taught to speak 
French prettily, and a charlatan can bow 
as well as a gentleman ; but for these 
accomplishments would we desire the 
worthless and unprincipled as the inti- 
mate associates of our children ? Imita- 
tive in all their ways, they cannot live 
under the same roof without imbibing 
something of the same spirit as those 
with whom they dwell. If children asso- 
ciate with the good, the noble, and the 
true, they will almost uniformly become 
good, noble, and true ; and in cases where 
they do not, may it not be traced to the 
effect of influence from a wrong and pol- 
luted source ? an unseen spring, not the 
less deadly because hidden from the pub- 
lic gaze. 
I have been surprised to note the con- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



"PEEFEEEING ONE ANOTHER." 53 

duct of my own children, the temptation 
through the influence of playmates to de- 
part from accustomed usage. We were 
in the habit of entertaining an aged wom- 
an, and as the children had never seen 
either of their grandmothers, they were 
permitted to give her the endearing title. 
Seeing her at the gate one morning, I 
asked Jem to run down the walk to meet 
her. It had always been his custom, 
without my suggestion, but this time he 
delayed. 

" Kun, my child." 

" Pshaw, it 's only grandma. Let her 
come in by herself." 

Surprised, as I had never heard him 
speak in this manner, my look revealed 
it. The small face was troubled, and he 
drew near mo. 

" She knows the way, if she can't see 
very well," and the voice grew tender. 

"She may know the way, bnt it would 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



54 WOMAN. 

please her. If papa was here, he would 
go." 

" But, mamma," and the child hesitat- 
ed, while the tears sprang into his brown 
eyes, "Stephen says it Is all nonsense to 
be polite to people you see every day." 

"People that we see every day are 
just the ones to whom we should be kind 
and attentive ; and to be kind and atten- 
tive is to be polite." 

" He says it takes too much time to 
run and open the door for everybody ; 
and the nest time grandma drops her 
handkerchief, let her pick it up." 

" G-randma cannot see as well as she 
could once ; she trembles, and her hand 
shakes. It troubles her to stoop, and 
she is tired all the time. My little boy 
is strong ; he can eat and sleep, can see, 
and hear, and run ; still, he is not will- 
ing to be courteous. Who will wait upon 
him, should he live to be old?" 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



"PREFERRING ONE ANOTHER." 55 

The tears were running down Jem's 
cheeks ; ho put up his hand to wipe them 
away, and then pressed his face still 
nearer to mine. 

" Mamma, will Jesus know ?'' 

" Jesus knows now, and he is grieved. 
Much as mamma loves Jem, Jesus loves 
him still more." 

"0 mamma, I don't want him to 
know;" and the small arms were cling- 
ing to my neck. "I wish he wouldn't 
look at me just now. Is it written down, 
mamma?" 

" I fear it is." 

" mamma, I can't have it, I can't 
have it ;" and the child's heart was stir- 
red to its inmost depths. 

"If my boy is really sorry, and will 
try to remember, Jesus will rub it out." 

"What will he do with it? Do ask 
him, mamma; I can't have it there." 

"Jesus loved Jem, and he shed his 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



56 WOMAN. 

blood that the black stain of sin might be 
washed white. If we ask, he will do it." 

" He wont hear roe now, I know. Do 
ask him, please ; I can't have it there. 
He loves you, mamma." 

"My asking will not do for my little 
boy ; he must himself ask." 

"Go with me, mamma, please. I've 
been so bad he wont look at me ; but if 
he knows I 'm your little boy, and that 
I 'm real sorry, he '11 rub it out ; I want 
to see him do it." And kneeling before 
the throne of grace we asked that this 
sin might be blotted out; that in the 
future we might be enabled to carry out 
the injunction, "In honor, preferring one 
another," studying each other's comfort, 
remembering especially the deference due 
to the aged, the infirm, and humble dis- 
ciple. "Inasmuch as ye have done it 
unto one of the least of these, ye have 
done it unto me." 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



"PEEFEKEING ONE ANOTHER." 57 

Looking into this mirror, we find that 
constant care ajid watchfulness is re- 
quired. "Be not deceived; evilcommn- 
nications corrupt good niamiers ;" " for 
what fellowship hath righteousness with 
unrighteousness, and what communion 
hatb ligtt with darkness?" If we desire 
to see our children pure, we must be 
careful that their associations are pure, 
the friendships they make, the books 
they read, the thoughts they cherish. 
Every day ideas are awakened, and im- 
pressions made, What shall they bo, is 
a question that seems ever sounding 
through the inmost chambers of the 
mother's heart. "What ideas ? what im- 
pressions? Is it the privilege of the 
mother to take the place of photogra- 
pher, or can she delegate it to another ? 

The artist, painting for all time; the 
sculptor, moulding for eternity, doea not 
look upon his work as drudgery. It is 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



his lifework; his heart goes out, every 
stroke of the brash ; every fall of the 
hammer reveals in a measure the beauty 
that he sees and feels. The four sides 
of his studio expand ; he sees in fancy 
an immense gallery filled with works of 
art: a long roll of names, and among 
them Jie sees his own. His work is un- 
veiled ; silent and still the crowds pause 
to admire ; his ear is greeted with words 
of commendation and praise ; tears are 
in his eyes ; he weeps, but they are tears 
of joy ; the little studio and the days of 
incessant toil are forgotten. List! the 
plaudit, "Well done!'' It is music to 
his heart, it well repays him for all the 
sacrifice. 

Is not the mother this painter, tracing 
figures for all time ? Is she not this 
sculptor, moulding and fashioning a soul 
for eternity ? Glorious work ! on earth 
there is nothing to equal it ; angels have 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



"PHEFEEEING ONE ANOTHEE." 59 

nothing more praiseworthy. This little 
mystic life, that caught its throbbing 
from her own heart, and- to which her 
soul is iadissolubly united, can be pol' 
ished by her more readily than by an- 
other; it is her lifework. Like one of 
old, she "cannot come down." Far away 
she sees a palace, fairer and more beau- 
tiful than mortal eyes have ever seen ; 
her work is to shine there. She sees 
the white robes, the crowns, the harps; 
and there is one for her, there is one for 
each of her babes. The long, weary days 
are forgotten, the watchful care, the tedi- 
ous lessons often repeated and long time 
in being learned, are not regretted. Up 
to these magnificent courts she sees the 
way. The Judge is there; she longs to 
look upon his face, she longs to kneel 
before him; "Behold, I and the children 
whom the Lord hath given me." 

While it is given the mother in an 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



especial sense, to form and polish, the 
duty is not so exclusively hers that it 
cannot be performed by another. In- 
deed, it is often done by those who are 
no manner of kin; the only bond requi- 
site is a heart brimming over with love, 
anxious to work for Christ, and seeing 
in every child, however destitute, the 
germ of a life that may be trained for 
usefulness here and happiness hereafter. 

A bereaved mother may be won to 
love and adopt for her own some sweet- 
faced orphan child who she fancies looks 
like her own lost darling, and on whom 
she is witling to lavish all a mother's 
love and affection. 

My neighbor over the way no longer 
looks and sighs. _ A sweet, fair face, with 
laughing blue eyes, and long, soft curls 
of sunny hair, sits beside her. Gertrude 
is very lovely. My neighbor looks and 
smiles. It happened thus : 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



"PBEFEBEING ONE ANOTHER." 61 

The venerable woman, of whom men- 
tion has been made, lived with a grand- 
child lip four flights of stairs. One day 
she grew too weary to come down the 
tedious length, and the next, God saw 
how faint and weak she was; and moved 
by love for her and for the child, he 
sent an angel to take her up still higher. 
Her sands were almost run. The tongue 
had well-nigh lost its power; but.it was 
enough for my husband and me to know 
the woman's wish, that henceforth Ger- 
trude should be to us as Margaret. 

The winter proved a hard one for the 
poor. It was well, we said, that grand- 
ma went to sleep before the cold came 
on ; and Gertrude, curling up into a ball 
before the cheerful fire, played making 
books with pictures in them, to suit the 
taste of baby Maude. It was autumn 
when Gertrude came to play with baby 
Maude ; the flowers were well-nigh gone, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



the brown earth sere and chill, good 
fires were needful. My neighbor's house 
was closed ; I did not see her leave, but 
I knew the very hour. There was a dull, 
cold look outside ; we should miss her 
just as one would miss a costly painting 
on the wall, a statue fallen from its place. 

The spring came round, and when the 
long June days warmed up the earth, 
and wove rich beauty from every nook 
and dell, my neighbor reappeared. The 
baby crowed and laughed, and Gertrude 
clapped her hands. It was a pretty 
sight ; the pale, sad face lighting up with 
smiles as she saw baby, turning her eyes 
half drowned in tears, as she caught the 
name " Gertrude." 

A quick thought flashed through my 
brain ; this woman had been a mother. 
I saw it, felt it, realized the kinship for 
the first time ; strange that I had been 
so dull. Catching her eye in the fulness 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



"PEEFEEEING ONE ANOTHEK." 63 

of my joy, I held my baby up, her silvery 
glee and laughter-loving eyes sending a 
pang to my neighbor's heart. Ah, me ! 
she too, had linown the joy of mother- 
hood. A mother's loss and sorrow had 
been hers, I saw it now. A little fleet- 
ing life, and I was sure the angels knew 
the child, aad called away her Ger- 
trude. 

Days passed. I saw the mother's face 
grow pale and thin ; her step was slow, 
and her head bowed as all too heavy 
for the slender neck. What right had I 
to so much happiness ? How could I sit 
and drink my fill, without a drop to 
quench my neighbor's thirst? My hus- 
band knew my thought, and his great 
heart, while tender, swerved not from 
the right. 

"If she will love her for her own, and 
bring her up to be a good, true woman ; 
but if not, she shall not have her. I 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



will not risk her soul for all the benefit 
of added wealth.'' 

I knew that he was right, he always 
is ; and making sure of all that I could 
learn, I dressed Gertrude in her pretti- 
est frock, and curling her sunny hair 
over my finger, bound it back with a 
blue ribbon, leaving her, forehead white 
and pure. A dainty pair of gaiters Mar- 
garet had, and into thesg I slid the well- 
shaped foot, and taking Gertrude by the 
hand, we crossed the street, and through 
my neighbor's gate. She met me gra- 
ciously; the sweet, pale lady took my 
hand in hers,- and asked me, as a sister 
would have done, the health of all at 
home Then, looking down, she kissed 
the ujiturned face of the sweet child. 

"And this is Gertrude? I have heard 
her name. We had a Gertrude once, 
and 1 have fancied — ■" 

The voice was gone. I slid my arm 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



■'PKEFEEEING ONE ANOTHER." 65 

around the lady's waist, and kissed her 
on the lips. She kissed me back, and I, 
forgetful that her dress was silk, and 
mine of common stuff, whispered of Ger- 
trude, and that the winter had been 
stern to us poor folk. 

" Give her to me, and know that 1 
will love her as my own. Henceforth 
she shall be to me as my own lost Ger- 
trude. But stop." And unwinding her 
arms that had been clasped around me, 
she flew down the walk to a small arbor 
covered with pink bloom. Lifting her 
snowy hand she swept back the fragrant 
curtain, and the next we saw she stood 
leaning on the arm of a gray-haired 
man, the tears, like two great pearls, 
still glistening, bvit her face bright and 
radiant with love. 

"My child, my-Gertrude, will you stay 
with us, and may we love and care for 
you as our very own ?" while the proud 

w=M^ 6 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



man lifted the little trembler in his arms, 
and kissed her as a father would have 
done. My eyes were full; I turned a 
look to our small home ; she will be hap- 
pier here, if they will love her, and 
bring her up to fear and love the Lord. 

The lady read my thought, and sweet- 
ly said : 

"We are unworthy followers of the 
same Lord; unworthy, most unworthy, 
grasping, with outstretched hand, his 
many gifts; but when he sent a messen- 
ger to take the one most loved and latest 
given, we murmured ; and* for this he 
sent leanness into our souls, leaving as 
to sit in darkness, until we came to a 
better mind." Then drawing close, she 
kissed me again, and told me of the 
lesson she had learned, and how she 
hoped never to grow forgetful of His 
love. 

We missed Gertrude for a time, and 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



"PRErEHRING ONE ANOTHER. " 67 

Jein and Margaret were lost in their lit- 
tle plays without her ; but we knew that 
it would be better for her in the future ; 
a broader culture she would have, per- 
haps, with added means for i 
and doing lasting good. 




cjiGoogic 





The Fear of Ridicule. 

"* MONG the various motives 
that influence us for good or 
for evil, none is more univer- 
sal or more powerful in its 
effects than the fear of ridi- 
cule. Deep down in the nature of every 
created being is an honest desire to be 
approved by friends and associates, and 
the knowledge of their displeasure, even 
with natures the most independent, rare- 
ly fails to give pain. But the pang that 
arises from, the want of approval is noth- 
ing, to the sting caused by the sarcastic 
emile, the covert shaft of ridicule. 

■ to the young, who are the 



cjiGooglc 



THE FEAK OF EIDICULE. 69 

most keenly alive to its influence, is its 
power often fatal. "Watching the chil- 
dren, I have learned to look at it as one 
of the greatest enemies that, as mothers, 
we have to contend with. It affords so 
natural, easy, and insidious an excuse 
for dereliction in duty. Much of the ex- 
aggeration, equivocation, and falsehood 
in our children has its origin in this 
source. It is an inherent evil, that can 
only be overcome by cultivating firm- 
ness, stability, and courage. Careful to 
implant right principles and correct views 
in the hearts of our children, we must 
also teach them to prize a higher stan- 
dard ' of excellence than mere human 
opinion ; regarding their own self-re- 
spect, pure niotives, and conscious integ- 
rity, as foundation stones on which the 
future manhood and womanhood is to be 
built. 

I am aware that many will say that a 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



subject of this, nature is altogether too 
grave to refer to ia the presence of 
young children. I admit that, should 
we thrust it upon our children without 
due care of mental strength and capaci- 
ty, it would probably do little good. 
More, it would do positive harm; for 
what overloads the child's mind, like the 
food that overloads his stomach, weakens 
rather than tends to strength. Milk be- 
longs to babes ; but as our children grow 
in years there is not much danger in 
giving them meat occasionally ; pap does 
not tend to strength and activity. True, 
we are to chop it fine, and to insist on 
its being well masticated; and the effect 
we see in the bright, healthy countenan- 
ces usually seen in children that are well 
fed, and have plenty of air and sunshine. 
Especially is it in childhood that all 
needful lessons are to be given by the 
mother ; for as they grow in years, they 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE FEAE OF EIDICULE. 71 

grow in a sense away from us ; that is, 
other influences creep in, weakening the 
effect of our words by the wider range 
of unexplored territory it is now theirs 
to tread. If, through fear of ridicule, 
they cannot say "No" to the entice- 
ments of their associates, there is little 
hope that they will be able in after years 
to maintain their integrity against the 
assaults of the adversary, always ready 
to seize upon the ignorant and the un- 
wary. Many a youth open to good in- 
fluences, has been sunk to the level of 
the worthless and vicious, by the dread 
of their sneer and the fear of their con- 
tempt. Many a young man, ignorant of 
the world and weak in principle, has 
been urged on by degrees to sacrifice 
his integrity, to sully his manhood, and 
to steep his whole nature in the black 
pool of sin, simply because he could not 
brave the laugh of his companions. Many 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



72 WOMAN. 

a daughter has turned to the grave as 
the only place to hide her shame, be- 
cause she had not strength of principle 
sufficient to say "No" when asked to 
ride on the Sabbath, to go to the thea- 
tre, or to some objectionable place of 
amusement. 

If wo would insure our sons and our 
daughters from such a fate, we must 
teach them the true end and aim of life 
from their infancy. Living in an age 
like ours, there is double danger lest 
the true scale of excellence be reversed, 
placing the body above the mind, and 
the mind above the heart; our sons 
priding themselves in strength and ac- 
tivity, wit, and geniality, in the room of 
strict integrity and high moral princi- 
ple ; our daughters on personal beauty, 
light, graceful accomplishments, and a 
winning fluency of speech, in the room 
of purity and a firm and abiding Chris- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE FEAK OF KIDICDLE. 73 

tian faith, the only safeguard for a wom- 
an. 

The fear of ridicule, while it is keenly 
felt by children and youth, does not ex- 
clusively belong to them. It Is very 
possible, that as mothers, we are still 
under its baneful influence ; doing as oth- 
ers do, dressing as others dress, merging 
our own individual acts and opinions 
into those of our neighbor ; craving sym- 
pathy from broken reeds and empty 
pitchers, in the room of leaning with 
heart and soul upon the sure foundation 
that is given us in the gospel. Woman, 
as being the more sensitive, is certainly 
the most subject to the fear of ridicule. 
Hence, she requires a more unwearied 
diligence, lest this fear betray her into 
covert or open neglect of known duty. 
The more sensitive the nature, the more 
liable to be in bondage to this fear. 
Many a student has not been proof 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



74 WOMAN. 

against the laugh of the most indolent 
scholar in his class: "There goes the 
plodder," or the son of a poor man work- 
ing his way up by the labor of his hands, 
ready to yield the point, throw aside his 
books, and sit down in despair, because 
some idle spendthrift taunted him with 
his necessity. Industry will overcome 
poverty; perseverance and indomitable 
energy are more to the student than 
mere natural gifts, or talents without 
application. 

To say "No," is as needful for the 
child as it is for the man. The first 
great requisite demanded by a wise and 
judicious parent is obedience. Children 
are subject to temptation quite as much 
as youth and middle age ; small paths, it 
is true, but in the direction of error just 
the same. To abstain from wrong-doing 
as a child requires principle ; not the 
principle of a man, but of a child. This 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



THE FEAR OF EIDICULE. 75 

principle is not the natural product of 
the heart, it is implanted there to be 
nourished, strengthened, fed by a moth- 
er's care and devotion. The mother's 
duty in this particular is not unlike the 
gardener's; he begins to train his vines 
when they are young and tender; he 
turns and twists them, he inclines them 
to twine about the support he offers ; he 
does not allow them to choose for them- 
selves ; the growth is theirs, but the man- 
ner depends upon him. He does more ; 
he obliges them, making them fast, and 
laying weights upon them, until time has 
made it natural for them to take that 
direction. Should the gardener leave 
his vines for a season, what a mass ! 
tangled, confused^ unsightly. His first 
care is to cut down, clip, and confine 
the young growth. True, with vigorous 
means he may bring "back beauty and 
order, but it will require double work ; 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



and with this it will of necessity require 
time before harmony will be established. 

With an exceedingly sensitive nature, 
affectionate, and still under fear of ridi- 
cule from his associates, Jem has taught 
nie many a lesson that I should not have 
learned without him. Willing to give 
hira a little pleasure, his father had taken 
him to spend a few days with a friend 
who had a large family of children, most 
of them boys. For lodging room the 
boys slept in the same apartment, small 
cots standing in rows. Jem was hon- 
ored with one of these quite by himself, 
the first night. Taking advantage of the 
occasion when the boys stood with their 
backs to him, Jem kneeled as he had 
been accustomed to do, said his prayer 
hurriedly, and slipped into bed, unob- 
served as he thought, by every eye. 

The next nighf, there was the addition 
of another visitor, a boy larger and more 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



THE FEAR OF EIDICDLE. 77 

advanced in knowledge; and this boy 
was given to share Jem's bed. It now 
required more courage to do his duty, 
and for a long time, as he afterwards 
told me, be deliberated. "If I kneel," 
he argued, " Richard is so full of fun he 
will be sure to see me, and will call the 
attention of the other boys and they will 
laugh at me. I cannot endure it." Con- 
science was faithful, however ; it had 
always been his custom not to close his 
eyes in sleep before he had gone to GJ-od 
in prayer. He realized that it was right ; 
he felt that he could not sleep without it, 
and still he could not do so without the 
risk of being laughed at by his associ- 
ates. At length his duty was too plain 
for him to refuse; he must kneel and 
pray silently. 

"Softly! softly! I thought he was a 
Methodist," and Richard crept up behind 
him and pulled his hair till he cried out. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



78 WOMAN. 

"Ha, ha, all pretence — was praying a 
minute ago," and a boyish laugh echoed 
through the room. 

A trying place I see, my son, and 
must have taxed your patience ; but 
prayer is the breathing of the heart's 
desire to God, and whatever the posture 
of the body, should not be omitted as 
we retire to rest. All the world over 
there will be those to scorn and deride 
you in your attempts to serve God ; but 
knowing the evil, we must not be over- 
come by it, onr trust must be in hira. 
As a little boy you need to ask him to 
keep you from doing wrong, and should 
you live to become a man, you will 
have the same need to ask him. In the 
world, my child, we cannot live without 
God. 

Temptations to evade duty are not 
confined to children. I may be allowed 
to mention an incident in the life of a 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE FEAR OF ItlDICULE. 79 

lady well known in the religious and 
literary world. In early life this lady 
had the misfortune to lose her father, 
and with him the wealth by which he 
had. been enabled to surround his family 
with all the luxuries and refinements of 
life. Delicate in health, a child but just 
entering her teens, she was educated be- 
yond her years, with a look and manner 
that spoke maturity of thought and pur- 
pose. A proficient in music, and anx- 
ious to make her education available for 
her mother and little brothers, she asked 
and obtained a position as music teacher 
in a female seminary in an adjoining 
'State. She had not been engaged in 
teaching more than six months before 
cholera broke out in the vicinity, and 
the principal of the seminary, a clergy- 
man advanced in years and exceedingly 
delicate, fell by it. 

At once tbe school was in alarm. 



cjiGoogic 



There was dread in the very name. 
Letters were written and trunlis packed ; 
the English teachers, older by a decade 
of years, had no power to pacify their 
pupils. Not another ease was fatal; and 
still, if the rumor got afloat, the school 
wonld be broken up. 

In this emergency the young music 
teacher called the roll and explained 
the nature of the disease, and the cause 
of the principal's death. She next de- 
manded the letters, ordered the trunks 
to be unpacked, and assured them that 
there was no ground for special alarm, 
and that the school in all its appoint- 
ments would go on as usual. Order was 
restored, and confidence established. 

The wife of the clergyman, overcome 
with grief at the loss of her husband, 
and inefficient to manage for herself, had 
looked upon it as a settled thing that 
the school must be broken up ; but witli 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE PEAR or KIDICULE. 81 

the reaction it was surprising to see how 
she leaned upon the self-appointed prin- 
cipal. Not only the school, but the do- 
mestic department was under her super- 
vision. Morning and evening devotion, 
as well as chapel duties devolved upon 
this young lady. Timid and shrinking, 
it was upon ordinary occasions a cross ; 
while the addition of guests made it still 
more keenly felt. 

One evening as the weary girl watched 
the day go out, a carriage entered the 
yard, and she caught a glimpse of an 
elegant-looking elderly man, his wife, 
and as she judged two daughters. Every 
thing about them showed culture and 
refinement. Introductions were made. 
It was Judge W- — ~ and family, a 
man of acknowledged worth and dis- 
tinction, the brother of the widowed 
woman in whose name the school was 
conducted. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



The evening passed. At nine o'clock, 
throagh the ample halls the bell sonnded 
for family prayers ; the teacher had not 
thought of it, hut with the first stroke of 
the hell it came unbidden : What if the 
guests should be there? What if the 
learned judge shoald refuse to lead ? 
The notes of the bell died away, the 
last footfall was heard on the stairs. A 
moment and the teacher crossed the hall 
to the parlor. The pupils, the family, 
and the guests wore seated. In the 
centre of the room stood a small table, 
with a chair beside it, and on it lay a 
Bible and hymn-book. "With a graceful 
bow the teacher turned to the judge and 
politely asked him to occupy the chair. 
The invitation was refused. 

"What was I to do?" said' the teacher, 
as years afterwards she related the inci- 
dent. "If I faltered, it would bring re- 
proach upon the name of Jesus. To go 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE PEAR OF RIDICULE. 83 

forward seemed impossible. My head 
reeled, and my hands trembled visibly. 

"Turning to the hundred and third 
Psalm, I read. Before I had reached 
the line, 'Like as a father pitieth his 
children, so the Lord pitieth them that 
fear him. For he knoweth our frame, he 
remembereth that we are dust,' I was 
calm. It was our habit to sing after 
reading; and striking into a familiar 
hymn, I noticed that the judge was 
greatly moved, and before its close he 
arose and left the room. The visitors 
remained several days ; but at prayer 
morning and night there was no more 
trepidation. 

"The morning he left," continued the 
lady, "after our usual service, the judge 
followed in prayer. It was a sweet sim- 
ple petition, and caused us ever after to 
remember him as a. personal friend. As 
he rose from his knees he came to me, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



84 WOMAN. 

the tears rolling down his manly cheeks, 
and taking my hand thanked me for the 
lesson he had learned. ' I have been a 
member of the church for years; but so 
rauch am I absent from home that I have 
allowed myself to omit family prayer. 
I am going home now to revive it, and 
I tliank you for not hesitating in your 
duty; my wife and daughters bless you 
for the example given them.' 

" Words are weak to describe my own 
feelings. I had hesitated, trembled, and 
almost fallen. I can never be sufli- 
ciently thankful that God sustained me. 
Had I then denied him, my whole after 
life perhaps would have been changed." 

Thus it is, there are turning points, 
decisions to be. made by childreo and 
youth as well as by people of mature 
years. Training children, we cannot 
exempt thera from temptation. There 
are foes within and foes without; but 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



THE FEAR OF EIDICULE. 85 

we must teach them to stand firm in 
their integrity, to make the love of God 
their guide, to remember that the eye 
of Jehovah is upon them, and that there 
is nothing for them to fear if they go 
forward in the discharge of all known 
duty. 




cjiGooglc 





IV. 
Home Duties. 

IFE is made up of littles, 
and home duties are the aggre- 
gate of littles, difficult to enu- 
merate, but easily performed j 
a nameless grace and beauty 
wrapping in the habitation, let It be a 
lordly palace or a settler's hot. Home 
is where the mother is, the mothers care 
and counsel investing it with a sanctity 
not to be found elsewhere. Poets have 
sung, and orators have loved to dwell 
upon the theme ; but poets and orators, 
in their grandest achievements, fail to 
equal the pictures enshrined in each 
heart. Language is weak to portray the 



cjiGoogic 



HOME DDTIES. 87 

emotion as we visit the old home; the 
same old hall, with the substantial oalf 
staircase, and the tall old-fashioned clock 
on the landing. Years are forgotten ; 
only yesterday, and we were children 
dancing through the room. The furni- 
ture is not the same, the paper on the 
wall is modern in its style; but to us 
the well-remembered faces, the chair in 
wliich a mother sat, the broad staircase, 
and the window in the angle of the wall, 
have a strange significancy. 

A blithe set of romping girls and 
boys, our mirth softened to cheerfulness 
as we gathered round tliis same old 
chair, Margaret, my Margaret, wears 
our mother's name, and in my turn do I 
try to teach my child in keeping with 
her rule. 

It is pleasant to watch the fair child's 
face, the light of intelligence breaking 
over it, the budding thought, the wealth 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



of feeling, the awakening imagination, 
the kindling fancy: pleasant inasmucli 
as it charms with its beauty, its fresh- 
ness, its sweet hopefulness, a charming 
i^eriousness creeping up as I look. This 
fair child, with her richly freighted mind 
and heart, is mine to polish for a "cor- 
nerstone," around which other founda- 
tions will be laid, a temple beautiful and 
fair to look upon. How shall I order it? 

In the mirror of God's word we find 
an admirable picture of home life : "Her 
children arise up and call her blessed, 
her husband also and he praiseth her ;" 
again, "Let them learn first to show 
piety at home," "not slanderers; sober, 
faithful in all things." 

By this it would seem that piety is 
the first requisite. Coveting, first of' all, 
"the best gifts," "the one thing need- 
ful ;'■ knowing that all requisite good will 
be added. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOME DUTIES. 89 

I have sometimes been afraid that 
much of the preciousness connected with 
our duties as mothers escarpes us through 
our failure to become acquainted with 
the temperament and condition of our 
children. Much of the effectiveness of 
our Saviour's teaching when upon earth 
arose from the fact that "He knew what 
was in"man," tempering his speech to 
suit the necessity of the case. To the 
mother this personal knowledge is all- 
important: tracing back, as she is able 
to do, the phases in her own life, 
the impressions and influences distinctly 
brought to mind in the habits and incli- 
nations of her children. This is one of 
the chief reasons why the work of train- 
ing so exclusively belongs to the mother, 
the more intimate knowledge that she 
possesses bringing her more in sympathy 
with the nature of her child, and enabling 
her to prove a skilful workman in shap- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



ing and polishing the life committed to 
her care. 

In doing this there can" be no precise 
form of speech or manner ; neither can 
any formula of rules be strictly adhered 
to. Of the children of the same mother 
no two are exactly alike : the same form 
of speech calculated to praise or to re- 
prove one would not be judicious when 
used for another. In the same disease 
the physician seldom treats two cases 
precisely alike. As a physician, the 
first care is to understand as much as it 
is possible for him to know, of the tem- 
perament, constitution, and habits of his 
patient. Then he notes the disease and 
makes out his diagnosis. This is the 
reason that we place so much confidence 
in the family physician : he is acquainted 
with our constitution, he knows what 
the system can bear, he is acquainted 
with the constitution of each of our chil- 



cjiGooglc 



HOME DUTIES. 91 

dren, which gives us a confidence in his 
treatment, that we could not feel in a 
stranger. 

The eye of the patient reveals much 
to the physician ; the brow, the cheek, 
the lip are all interpreters. He lays 
his finger on the telltale pulse, he puts 
himself in sympathy with his patient, 
his whole being is absorbed in his work, 
the life of his patient is in his hands, 
it will be required of him. A trifling 
neglect, or an ill-made figure, a false 
weight, or imperfect measurement, and 
the life is lost. The physician knows this, 
and be watches and notes every change. 
He dares not delegate it to another ; 
however weary he may be, be is not 
satisfied until he has made his round. 

All this is done by the conscientious 
physician to save a temporal life. Eter- 
nal life is the care of the mother. Can 
she prove less watchful ? Can she with 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



more security neglect her duty? Can 
she suffer herself to make a mistake ? 

In view of such responsibility, what 
mother wouM but tremble in accepting 
the charge were it not for the promises: 
"Lo, I am with you alway ;" "All things 
whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believ- 
ing, ye shall receive ;" "Ask and it shall 
be given you ;" "If any of you lack wis- 
dom let him ask of God, and it shall be 
given him." The Scriptures distinctly 
teach that home is the legitimate realm 
of woman, the ordering of her household 
and the training of her children her 
highest duty, her sweetest privilege. In 
the fulfilment of this duty, honor has 
always awaited her, "her own works 
praise her in the gates." 

Premising that, as mothers feeling 
the weight of individual responsibility 
we are to consult the mirror of God's 
word, we will consider more particularly 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HOME DUTIES. 93 

home duties, aad the necessity laid npon 
ns to render home the most attractive 
place that can be found by our children. 
This does not of necessity require wealth, 
or extravagance in outfit. A mother's 
arms in fond endearment, are more that 
frescoed walls and elegant hangings. The 
humblest room is beautified by her smile, 
the most magnificent one will be cold 
and barren without it. Many a child 
and many a youth goes astray, not be- 
cause his home is not well appointed, 
but simply because home lacks sunshine. 
Many, through over zeal to be called 
good housekeepers, disgust and repel, 
without seeming to be conscious where 
the mistake lies. A fly lighting on the 
wall has power to disturb them. A 
beam of sunshine quite throws them into 
a fever. To be neat and orderly is 
praiseworthy, but to shut out the light 
and sunshine for fear that the furniture 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



will be injured, or the carpet faded, is 
like throwing away pearls and gathering 
pebbles. 

Children live in the present, they are 
fond of brightness, . they love the sun- 
shine, and it is natural for them to seek 
the place where they fiod it. If home is 
the spot where everj' thing is dark and 
gloomy, with sour faces, harsh words and 
continual fault-finding, rest assured they 
will spend as little time as possible there. 
On the contrary, if father and mother 
unite to make it beautiful, the father 
expending according to his means, giv- 
ing his children to see that he desires 
their happiness, and is doing all that be 
can to insure it ; the mother, light- 
hearted, happy, winsome, remembering 
her own youth, enjoying a good health- 
ful romp with her children, showing her 
interest by talking with and entertaining 
them as she does her friends, entering 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOME DUTIES. 95 

into the spirit of their games, reading, 
studying, putting herself in sympathy 
with them, the probabilities are that 
such a mother will never be called to 
mourn the downfall of a son or a d 



A bright cheerful home is a place of 
security in times of temptation and dan- 
ger. Blessed the remembrance of such 
a home : the walls plain and unassuming, 
furniture simple, books and pictures few 
but admirably arranged, while over all 
is the gehial loving smile of the mother, 
the warm hand-clasp, the kiss. Humble 
as their home is, the children will never 
find another to equal it. Such homes 
are foretastes of the final home with our 
dear heavenly Father. It will be all 
sunshine there, all love, all happiness. 

Another effectual way to render home 
happy to our children, is to give them 
something to do. It awakens their in- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



terest and deepens their love ; they are 
led to look upon themselves as in a sense 
essential to their parents ; it kindles a 
desire to please, and thus invested with 
a share of responsibility there is a cer- 
tain child dignity to be supported, an un- 
conscious deepening of principles. Some 
years since, on a visit to a friend whose 
little son, a bright manly boy of eight 
summers, was particularly winning, I 
was impressed with the benefits to be 
derived from this course. On being 
asked to return with me and spend a 
few days, his reply was, "My father 
cannot spare me ;" his whole appearance 
showing how much he valued the idea of 
being useful to his father ; heightening 
his own self-respect, and having a ten- 
dency to render him more manly. 

Children are naturally helpful; their 
daily activities can be turned into profit- 
able channels, or allowed to run to waste, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOME DUTIES. 97 

according to the mother's iofluence. It 
is a sad thing to see a child bowed down 
under burdens too heavy for it; but if 
we would have our children happy, wo 
must let them bear the yoke in their 
youth ; giving them certain duties and 
holding them responsible for the fulfil- 
ment of those duties. 

Of necessity these should be light, 
not given as a tax, but as a duty, the 
performance intended to bring pleasure. 
Duties thus performed will give them a 
relish for work in after life, and custom 
^vill render it easy. In my own case, the 
first duty given to Margaret was to dust 
papa's study chair. This was to be done 
every morning at a specified time. Jem 
was taught to bring his father's dressing 
gown and slippers as he came in at night. 
This was not exacted of him merely as 
something to be done ; but to stimulate 
his memory and render him mindful of 

iiKbcjiGoogic 



such little acts of courtesy, esteeming it 
a greater favor to assist others than to 
be assisted by them. 

As they grew older more was required 
of them, not enough to weary, but suffi- 
cient to give zest to recreation ; they 
were not less active at their games, 
while they grasped study with a firmer 
hold, a more abiding love. In garden- 
ing they were permitted to have a share, 
a certain pride in possession showing 
itself on their faces and in their words. 
Each was provided with a set of small 
tools, always to be ptit in their respect- 
ive places when they had been used. 
In this manner, health was won and the 
whole mental machinery gained strength. 
Nature is a wonderful teacher : not even 
a child can come in contact with her 
without visible improvement. 

Stronger by degrees the mind grows 
as the body strengthens, and many a 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HOME DUTIES. 99 

lesson of trust and patient waiting was 
learned in the garden. Precious little 
helpers ! How they soften the cares and 
the burdens of life. Calm, confident, 
and trusting in our knowledge and judg- 
ment, what a lesson do they teach us of 
security in the guardianship of our dear 
heavenly Father. Many times, when 
my soul was troubled and heavy with 
care, have I locked into the calm bright 
faces around me. "You can make it 
all right, mamma," were words that rung 
through my heart-chambers. Such love 
and confidence my children had in me : 
while I, knowing that a Father's love 
was mine, that a precious Elder Brother 
was touched with my infirmities, was yet 
often weak and desponding. 

Gertrude not unfrequently joined us 
in our work, bringing in her hand a 
rare flower, a climbing rose, or a vine: 
something to be to us a remembrancer. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



Each day increased her beauty — a pre- 
cious bud unfolding where all was fair; 
a blessing in her new home, the gen- 
tle childlike air and manner winning 
more than her words. 

"Mamma," exclaimed Margaret, as 
her hour in the garden expired, and she 
turned to her lessons, "I love the gar- 
den better than any of my books." 

" Do you call the garden a book ?" 

" You know what you have often told 
me, that every leaf was a letter; and I 
thought if the leaves were letters, the 
whole world would make a book." 

" True, in that case it is a book writ- 
ten with the finger of God, each leaf a 
letter from which we are to spell lessons 
of love, of joy and thankfulness." 

Who that listens to the child's query, 
that stops to analyze child-feeling, or 
attempts to answer a twentieth of the 
questions asked, can for a moment think 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HOME DUTIES. 101 

that there is a period in their lives 
when the highest intellectual gifts are 
not called into requisition ? Milk is 
diluted to give to babes, and meat is 
given in dainty morsels. It is not in 
quantity, but in quality the same as the 
man of full grown power requires. Thus 
with instruction, it should be the best, 
the choicest, the most attractive, served 
up to suit the strength of the mental pal- 
ate, inclining the child to desire more. 

The Bible is replete with evidence 
that childhood is the time to make an in- 
telligent choice of God's service. From 
the beginning when the Creator insti- 
tuted the family relation, down to the 
time when the Saviour enjoined it upon 
Peter to prove his love by caring for 
the lambs, lawgivers, prophets, priests, 
and apostles have taught that children 
are the especial charge of our heavenly 
Father, to be received and loved and 



cjiGoogic 



102 ■WOMAN. 

instructed as those who could best under- 
stand, and most readily believe in and 
serve Him. " Except ye be converted 
and become as little children, ye shall 
not enter into the kingdom of heaven." 
" Whosoever shall not "receive the king- 
dom of God as a little child, shall in no 
wise enter therein." Who so ready to 
be taught as a child ? Who so ready to 
believe, so frank, so confiding? Such 
love is very precious in the sight of 
G-od. The fragrance of the opening bud 
is deeper than that of the full blown 
flower. Homo duties are precious in 
proportion as they are blended with love 
to God : his glory being of paramount 
importance ; his love filling our hearts 
and the hearts of our children with peace. 
In connection with this, I remember 
to have heard a mother say she feared 
that if her children were taught to 
breathe in the atmosphere of God's love, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOME DUTIES. 103 

thinking and acting and living as m his 
presence, they would fail to know by 
experience the regenerating inflnence of 
his Spirit in their hearts. 

" Only believe," is the requirement. 
Belief is the foundation of the Christian 
faith. What have brain power and years 
of mental training to do with this? "The 
wisdom of the world is foolishness with 
God." There isno fitness attained through 
knowledge or learning, no virtue in wait- 
ing a specified term of years. "With the 
heart man believeth unto righteousness." 
The undoubting clinging trust of the 
child is the one thing needful: "Now is 
the accepted time ; behold, now is the 
day of salvation." Was it not in view 
of this truth that Jesus said, "I thank 
thee, Father, Lord of heaven anS 
earth, because thou hast hid' these things 
from the wise and prudent, and hast 
revealed them unto babes."' 



cjiGoogic 



Not too young! Oh no, not too young! 
My heart thrills with rapture as I look 
into Margaret's upturned, face, lay my 
hand on Jem's brown head, and draw 
Maude, my dove-eyed Maiide, to my 
bosom. Not too young to come to Jesus. 
Dear ones ! may I not as a mother fail 
to plant the seeds of truth in your hearts 
from fear that the soil is not old enough 
to receive it ! 

In mimic play children imitate those 
of larger growth: their doll-gatherings 
and tea-parties are on the same plan as 
those they have been accustomed to see 
the mother serve ; they try to do and to 
say exactly what they understand to be 
in keeping with the occasion: receiving 
and entertaining their guests with a 
strange blending'of child grace and wom- 
anly dignity that would be ridiculous if 
not for its ingenuousness. 

I was forcibly impressed with this 



cjiGoogic 



HOME DUTIES. 105 

during a few days' serious illness. It 
was a a season when it was almost im- 
possible to secure a nurse. In this 
dilemma, Margaret was our little nurse 
and housekeeper. Too ill to give direc- 
tions, I was surprised to see how closely 
the child imitated her mother's move- 
ments : a certain order pervaded the 
room ; and while she brought the medi- 
cine, dropped it into a spoon, and made 
nourishing drinks for me, she also set 
the table and prepared the meals for the 
family. 

"Do not think about it, mamma, it 
will make your head ache ; papa says 
that I do very nicely." Sweet lesson 
of patient doing; and lying with closed 
eyes, I tried to take it in: the simple 
child-faith, never' once murmuring that 
she did not know more, was not older, 
and of course more able ; but thankful 
and willing to do her best, feeling ap- 



cjiGoogic 



proved of her own conscience, and well 
pleased with the commendation of her 
parents. At breakfast and tea, the small 
housewife perched herself in mamma's 
chair, giving papa his cup, a touching 
gravity on the young fair face, that ren- 
dered it only the more attractive. 

It is a mistaken idea that helpfulness 
tends to a stiff mature manner, repulsive 
as shown in a child. To be helpful does 
not crush out the glee and playfulness 
of the child nature. On the contrary, 
their young hearts bubble over with 
more fre.shness. A bow that is al- 
ways bent, loses its vigor, and continual 
play ceases to have a charm even for a 
child. 

As much of the happiness of home 
depends upon the dignity and ease with 
which the nameless daily duties are dis- 
charged, it becomes us as mothers to 
invest the most menial service with an 



cjiGooglc 



HOME DUTIES, 107 

air of cheerfulness, never considering it 
a reproach to be found superintending 
or doing with our own hands whatever 
tends to the completeness of a well- 
ordered household. It is too much the 
custom to cry out against the petty ex- 
actions, the confinement and care neces- 
sary to the mistress of a family; mak- 
ing mountains out of mole-hills; driven, 
nettled, throwing aside responsibility if 
possible ; breaking up, boarding, or leav- 
ing all to servants, regarding even the 
eare of their own children as too much 
labor and trouble. Let this habit pre- 
'vail, and what secui'ity have we that 
our sons will ripen into honorable man- 
hood? that our daughters will rise up 
and call us blessed ? 

If we would reap, we must first plant 
the seed. Neither can this be done 
without a careful preparation. There is 
no chance work : there is an end and an 



cjiGoogic 



108 WOMiN. 

aim. Neglect our duties we may, dele- 
gate thera to others, or leave them to 
the mercy of circumstances ; but respon- 
sibility will still cling to us, and at last 
the account must be rendered, and the 
reward will be proportioned to our faith- 
fulness. 




cjiGoogic 





"What ShaU We Read? 

^N this age of books, news- 
papers, and magazines, this ques- 
tion is one of vital importance. 
What shall we read? What 
shall our children read ? Tliere 
are now so many really good books, 
especially for the young, that it involves 
judgment and taste, as well as principle, 
to make a judicious choice. In adorn- 
ing a temple, the workman chooses, out 
of the abundance of gold and silver and 
precious stones, such as fit the purpose 
and the end in view. Those that he 
rejects may be as valuable as any, but 
not so well adapted to his present need. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



110 WOMAN. 

To read all the good books would be an 
impossibility, even if we had the means 
to obtain them. To read without a pre- 
scribed course would be no better for 
the intellect, than food would be for the 
body when taken at all hours, regard- 
less of the stomach and the work it has 
to do in digestion. 

"I never saw such a thirst for reading 
as my son has," said one lady to another ; 
"it is nothing but read, read. We can 
hardly get him to take necessarj'' exer- 
cise." 

"Ah," returned the lady, "to be a 
diligent reader is certainly commend- 
able. What kind of reading does your 
son prefer?'' 

"Oh, any thing. He just reads all 
the time." 

The mother spoke with the tone of 
one who felt that her son was to be com- 
mended. The lady was surprised, and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



WHAT SHALL WE KEAD? Ill 

upon a fitting occasion questioned tlie 
son. Alas ! he did read ail the time, as 
his mother said, the sickly sensational 
stories brought to him through the col- 
umes of his favorite newspapers ; feeding 
on husks, worse than husks, light, foamy, 
evanescent. No; they left a stain on 
the soul, a taste in the mouth, that will 
effectually deprive hira of a relish for 
any thing better. What mother would 
not cry out to see her son feeding oa 
garbage, seeking it through the gutters ? 
Aad is there a mother that can see her 
child devouring poison, forgetful of pres- 
ent duty, lost in the dreams of the 
novelist, and not cry out against it? 

As mothers, cannot we teach our chil- 
dren to cultivate a purer taste, to shun 
as they would the plague the pictures 
of vice and demoralization? Cannot we 
teach them to abstain from impure lit- 
erature, just as we teach them not to 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



112 WOMAN. 

tamper witU opium, with alcohol and 
tobacco? It will not do to hesitate. 
The evil is abroad. We must meet it; 
not with a captious, fault-finding spirit, 
but lovingly, holding up the mirror of 
G-od's word, drawing just inferences 
and conclusions, constrained by its teach- 
ing rather than our own to see that it 
is impossible for the mind to dwell on 
scenes such as are represented in too 
many of our books and papers, without 
receiving impressions injurious to the 
progress of positive good in the soul. 

It will not be sufficient to show them 
the baneful effects of such reading, but 
we must teach them what to read, choos- 
ing for them, and cultivating taste as 
well as higher mental faculties, and lead- 
ing them to choose wisely for them- 
selves. Cannot we teach our children 
that the daily study of God's word is 
indispensable ? Fond of stories, roman- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



WHAT SHALL WE BEAD? 113 

tic and imaginative, what book so well 
calculated to charm them by the variety 
of its themes, the interest of its history, 
the matchless beauty of its poetry, the 
depth of its science, the simplicity and 
power of its oratory? So varied is it, 
and so enlarged in its scope, that were 
there not another book within his reach, 
the thorough Bible-student would be just- 
ly considered a learned man. 

To impress our children with the 
beauty and interest of the Bible, we 
must feel them ourselves. In order to 
inculcate its truths, we must honor them 
in our lives : to win daily study, wc must 
ourselves daily study the Scriptures, we 
must speak of them and consult them, 
making them the rule and the standard 
of daily life. To win our children to 
love what we love, we must bring before 
their understanding the truth which tends 
to excite or call forth the emotion of 

w™.u. 8 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



love. If we desire them to love a friend 
or a relative, we tell them of the many 
noble qualities this frienii possesses, and 
his generous self-sacrificing deeds. We 
describe his very look, manner, style, 
voice, and gesture; and as they listen. 
we see by the kindling eye, the chang- 
ing countenance, that their hearts beat 
in unison with ours. 

Thus with our Bible histories, read to 
and with our children. Of ourselves we 
cannot win them ; but as we read the 
wonderful story of Christ, of his early 
youth, his generous deeds, and spotless 
character, his yearning compassion, not 
willing that any should perish, his love 
for little children, bidding them come to 
him, we see the movings of his Spirit in 
their heart, their affections sweetly go- 
ing out after God. 

By becoming thus familiar with the 
Bible, the historical and prophetical, as 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



WHAT SHALL WE READ? 115 

well as the biographical pai-ts of it, they 
will erect a standard that will be of 
essential service in the selection of other 
books and authors — a standard of beau- 
ty, purity, and truthfulness, to which 
their general taste will conform. 

Physicians tell us that a variety of 
foo'd is indispensable to the health of the 
body. God has given us a generous 
supply, and we are called upon to choose 
certain dishes that suit our taste, and 
others which particularly agree with the 
system and constitution ; the stomach 
readily digesting them, turning them to 
blood and bones and flesh, renovating 
■and strengthening the entire body. Thus 
the mind requires a variety ; we should 
choose such works as are in themselves 
helpful, suggestive, having a tendency to 
lead upward; with truth to rest upon, 
argument sufficient to tax 'the reasoning 
powers and enlist the judgment, beauty 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



to awaken the imagination and the fancy, 
with an easy onward movement, leading 
thought outward, upward, after some- 
thing holier, happier, more abiding than 
can be found in ourselves. 

Through the agency of books, we be- 
come acquainted with the history of na- 
tions and people centuries before us ; flie 
rise and fall of empires, the glory of 
kingdoms, the downfall of states. Indi- 
vidualizing we become interested. We 
enter into the spirit of the age, un- 
derstanding the motives and influences 
brought to bear upon the minds of the 
leading actors in the great drama of life, 
winning experience through their mis- 
takes: the whole having a tendency to 
render us more just, more generous, more 
charitable. Our range of thought should 
be broad, vast, comprehensive, and we 
should think of ourselves as nothing, and 
still hold ourselves as ennobled by rea- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



WHAT SHALL WE READ? 117 

son of our relation to the Creator ; for we 
are "bought with a price," and should 
be careful in word, thought, and deed, 
not to dishonor him. 

The study of geology, astronomy, bot- 
any, and other natural sciences will dis- 
close to us beauty more wondrous and 
fascinating than the pen of the novelist 
ever drew, the glory and majesty of 
God's works, his treasured storehouse 
being revealed to us, the secrets of the 
great deep made known. To engage the 
minds of our children to follow after 
things beautiful and good, we must im- 
press them with an earnest persistent 
desire after what is beautiful and good 
in our own lives. We must know the 
way and walk in it, before wc can point 
it out to others. 

The choice of authors we must make 
a personal matter, selecting according to 
the character, inclination, pursuits, and 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



118 WOMAN. 

temper of the child. As no two chil- 
dren are exactly alike in look, tempera- 
ment, and habit, so each must have of 
necessity a different way of looking at 
things, different methods of thought and 
study. We are not to destroy these 
individual characteristics, but to train 
them, turning natural inclination into 
profitable channels ; bringing out ability 
and passive talent, laying open the un- 
derstanding to the light of truth, mellow- 
ing the sensibilities, and making ready 
for an abundant harvest. 

While it is well to have a book al- 
ways on hand, fleshless lips ready with 
a thought or a suggestion, it is abso- 
lutely necessary to cultivate a method- 
ical arrangement, a regular course of 
reading, if we would build up g,nd im- 
prove the mind to the highest limit. 
Neither will it be sufficient to read; we 
must aid our children to form right hab- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



WHAT SHALL WE READ? 119 

its of thought, judging accurately with 
respect to the characters they meet with 
in reading, sifting and analyzing men's 
aims in life, appropriating what is good, 
and leaving the chaff, if chaffs there be, 
to the winds of forgetfulness. 

These arc preliminary preparations, 
weak and imperfect in themselves, and 
still helps in the formation of character 
lasting as eternity. 

Another consideration, and one which 
through the multiplicity of care we too 
frequently forget, is a specific arrange- 
ment with reference to time, a sensible 
division of duties ; with no conflict, no 
clashing, nothing hurried, nothing omit- 
ted. We should cherish order without 
rudeness, a certain gliding movement 
showing executive power and ability in 
guiding the small craft safely. 

A habit of reading is one of the best 
safeguards for our children against temp- 



cjiGooglc 



120 WOMAN, 

tation; rendering home peculiarly dear 
to them. As they gather around the 
study table, the out-door life is for the 
time forgotten ; while the child revels 
in the sublimity of thought, the beauty 
of conception, the elevating imagery of 
the printed pages: perchance travelling 
through space, calling the stars by name, 
measuring their distances, noting their 
changes, studying their nature, conjec- 
turing of their inhabitants ; thus the mind 
is enlarged, and the heart aided to grasp 
a more tangible idea of the greatness, 
the power, the love of the great Author. 

In contrast with such delights, vice 
will look less attractive, and folly lose 
its charm. Time will seem more pre- 
cious, life more dignified and noble, and 
the responsible duties of life worthy of 
more careful consideration. 

Sitting by the dancing flittering fire- 
light, Newton reasoned, and Fulton stud- 



cjiGoogic 



WHAT SHALL WE EEAD ? 121 

ied, with many others, a long gallery of 
names of whom the world is justly proud. 
Not merely the circumstances in life, but 
a thousand varied influences go to form 
the child's life, to mould the character: 
the unconscious influence, the caress, the 
half-spoken word, the unvoiced rebuke, 
the speaking, pleading eye, the silent 
prayer. 

In the division of duties we are not 
to forget a specified season of prayer, 
an hour set aside to intercede for our- 
selves and our loved ones at the throne 
of grace ; specifying their names one by 
one, breathing our hopes, fears, desires 
'into the ear of our heavenly Father ; 
beseeching him by his great mercy to 
have them in his most holy keeping. 
Let the children know this hour ; let 
them see how much we lean upon the 
arm of his love for wisdom to guide and 
direct us in all that we do. Let them 

iiM:c3,Googlc 



122 WOMAN. 

feel how much we value these precious 
seasons of communion with Christ, in 
joy or in sorrow going to him freely, 
talking with him just as they are accus- 
tomed to see us talk with our long cher- 
ished friends. 

A mother who has the happiness of 
seeing all her sons occupying places of 
trust and responsibility — all of them, 
with one exception, converted in early 
life— made it a practice to kneel with 
her boys separately : specifying the little 
daily acts of 'each one, imploring that the 
good in his character might be strength- 
ened, the ill blotted out ; thus making 
the Saviour her confidant, and leading 
her children to feel that whatever was 
done would be repeated by the mother. 
On one occasion she was obliged to 
administer correction to the youngest, 
leaving him in his room while she went 
about her ordinary duties. Presently 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



WHAT -SHALL WE BEAD? 123 

the door opened and a little pleading 
voice cried: 

"Mamma, I'm fretted; let us go and 
tell Jesus." And not until she led him 
to the accustomed room, and kneeling 
witli him, told the Saviour just what he 
had done, could the child feel that the 
wrong was forgiven. 

Such hours with our children are to 
be looked upon as seasons of commu- 
nion with God, in which our souls gain 
new vigor, and from which we are to 
return filled with that fulness of delight 
which every soul must feel after an in- 
terview with its Beloved. 



cjiGooglc 





_What Shall We Sing? 

■^HE question implies that we 
do sing. Music belongs to tlie 
family as much as song to birds, 
sunshine to flowers, dew to the 
parched fields. Who ever for- 
its the music of a mother's voice in a 
mother's song? or is not, later in life, 
conscious at times of a secret longing 
down deep in the heart to be folded 
once more in the same loving arms, to 
be rocked to sleep with the same soft 
lullaby? Why is it that our hearts 
thrill with rapture as we listen to the 
grand onward flow of Old Hundred, or 
Coronation, in the sweet "still hour of 



cjiGooglc 



WHAT SHALL WE SING? 125 

prayer," save that a mother's face is 
hidden there, a mother's voice lingering 
in the inmost recesses of our hearts? 
Since we are to have music in heaven, it 
is well to commence on earth. What so 
natural to the renewed heart as praise ? 
Joy and gladness bubble up in the heart 
of a child. Some one has appropriately 
said : "The Christian life is only a glori- 
fied childhood." 

If we would have home bright, beau- 
tiful, and happy, we must not be afraid 
to sing. "Make a joyful noise unto 
God, all ye lands, sing forth the honor 
of his name: make his praise glorious; 
all the earth shall worship thee, they 
shall sing to thy name." 

With what feelings of awe and rev- 
erence we walk on the shores of the 
great sea, and listen to the choral chant 
sweeping up from innumerable waves ; 
the grand "all hail" echoing along the 



cjiGoogic 



vaulted arch; "the stars singing to- 
gether," and the sons of God striking 
their golden harps in unison. The winds 
like the tread of mighty armies, swelling 
across the plain, and through the tree- 
tops, deep, full, sonorous ; then low, sad, 
plaintive. The song of the breeze and 
the rain-drops ; the flower bells and the 
lily cups joining in the chorus: "'All 
the earth shall worship thee, they shall 
sing to thy name." 

"What recollection is more pleasing 
than the gatherings at nightfall ; the 
memory of mingled voices blending still 
closer the harmonies of affection, by the 
refining influences of this heaven-born 
art. No one influence will add more to 
the comfort of home than the cultivation 
of pure and elevating music. With it 
children are more easily governed, and 
its practice is favorable to relinement of 
thought and elevation of character. 



cjiGoogic 



WHAT SHALL WE SING? 127 

As our little ones grew oMer we paid 
more attention to music ; their father 
had a good voice, and I had been said 
to know something of it in my young 
days; and with Margaret and Jem to 
carry a part, wo frequently sat in the 
twilight and sang, not minding if the 
passers stopped at the gate. Gertrude 
had a sweet voice, and in her new home 
she was favored with a rare teacher. 
Professor Islam was a thorough musi- 
cian. His soul was full of music bub- 
bling up and running over his lips ; 
every nerve thrilled with melody; his 
movement was the poetry of song, and 
■loving his art, he loved the Giver ; and 
loving God he loved every created being. 
and longed with all the fervor of his great 
generous heart to teach them to sing. 

Professor Islam passed by one evening 
just as we had gathered around the in- 
strument with our evening songs. The 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



voices of the children fitled him with a 
desire to enter. The hour passed on 
the wings of melody. Hitherto we had 
been obliged to dispense with a- tenor. 
Although so young, Margaret was a 
lover of music, and putting her lips to 
my ear, she begged me to invite the pro- 
fessor to come again. The next day my 
neighbor called in person. "Would I 
be so good as to permit Margaret to 
take lessons of Gertrude's teacher ?" It 
was the very thing I had desired, and 
renewed cause had we to sing ; for His 
goodness had been round about ns — His 
banner over us had been love. 

The family is the nursery of the church. 
Henee a Christian family must sing with 
the same spirit in which they pray. 
Singing is only talking in a different 
key: "singing with the spirit, and with 
the understanding." Two spirits can- 
not prevail in us at the same time, a 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



WH4T SHALL WE SING? 129 

spirit of praise and thanksgiving, and a 
spirit of gloom and despondency are not 
expected to harmonize. 

In the selection of music the same 
conscientious care is required as in read- 
ing. If we would shun low, vain, trifling 
reading, we must not sing low, vain, fool- 
ish songs. It is impossible for the soul 
to rise on the wings of melody if the 
words are light and frivolous. The charm 
is not alone in the air, Uie sentiment 
must be refined and elevating, or the 
influence of the melody is lost. In con- 
versation a musical voice heightens the 
effect, it gives pleasure, we love to lis- 
ten; but it is the theme that has the 
power, lifting us above the trivial em- 
ployments of timOj filling the soul with 
glimpses of what is beyond, strengthen- 
ing and invigorating by its genial influ- 
ences and causing the pathway of life to 
brighten with added loveliness. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



As ill conversation pictures of noble- 
ness and truth are stamped upon the 
soul, so -with music the words should be 
pure, elevating, the air inspiring. "Is 
any merry? let him sing." Is any sad, 
song has a healing balm. Heaven is 
described as a place where each inhab- 
itant has a crown and a harp. 

Besides the pleasure received, music 
is an educator; the study of it as a 
science has as much to do in disciplining 
the mind as a course in mathematics, or 
the study of languages. The laws of 
rhyme, harmony, and counterpoint are 
not mastered without long and attentive 
study, laying the foundation for close 
consecutive thought ^nd well-digested 
argument. 

As a people we have been behind in 
the study of music; but that day is past. 
Music is no longer a graft, wc may safe- 
ly consider it an inborn principle, or 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



WHAT SHALL WE SING? 131 

rather to be drunk in by our children 
with the air they breathe. . Much of this 
we doubtless owe to the loved authors 
of Hebron, TJsbridge, and other like 
modern compositions. All praise to the 
energy and skill brought to bear upon 
the turning-point in our musical history. 
It is to their far-sightedness that we are 
indebted for the introduction of music 
into our public schools : while it is still 
left to us as mothers to introduce it into 
our families; a tiny golden thread let 
down from heaven by which our chil- 
dren are to be led along the path of 
rectitude and honor. Next to prayer, 
inusic is the best safeguard ; evil thoughts 
and base purposes cannot enchain a soul 
accustomed to soai; into the divine realm 
of sacred melody. 

It was said by the corn-law rhymer, 
" Let me make the songs for the people, 
and I care not who makes the laws." 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



From Jubal to the present time music 
has been a powerful instrument to in- 
spire. The soldier is led on to victory 
by it, the devotion of the Christian is 
heightened by it, social life is enlivened 
and polished: while it is to the family a 
divine messenger of love, stimulating to 
good works, linking heart to heart, and 
binding with a threefold cord to the 
throne of God. 

The love and practice of music tend 
to benevolence, just as the love of God 
in the soul does away with caste and 
exclusive privilege. 

"Mamma," said Margaret as she came 
from her lesson, her face aglow with en- 
thusiasm, "Professor Islam says it can 
be done." 

"What can be done, my child ?" 

"The little musical entertainment that 
you and papa were speaking of." 

"You asked him?" 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



WHAT SHALL WE SING? 133 

'Was it wrong, mamma?" and the 
blue eyes grew misty, "I did so want 
the money, and if we sing for it, it will 
be ours to give; and mamma," coming 
very near and leaning her head on my 
shoulder, "God will think more of it, 
gained in this way, than he would if 
papa was rich and could gire it to us." 

We had been talking of a mission- 
school in connection with our regular 
church work, but funds were wanting, 
and looking about for ways and means 
a musical entertainment or concert by 
oar little band was suggested. It only 
needed my neighbor's influence and the 
professor's leadership to insure success, 
and this the children had obtained. 

In all plans of benevolence we were 
in the habit of allowing the children to 
share. Thus their interest was enlisted, 
and the habit of giving, or of dividing 
what they had with those who had less, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



was established. Not alone for the mis- 
sion-school but daily as we met, Mar- 
garet and Gertrude joined in singing 
the standard hymns and tunes, the little 
waifs chiming in with great spirit and 
abandon. 

In every heart there is a germ of lovo 
for the good and the beautiful, and it is 
to cultivate this germ, to awaken the 
desire in the soul for something higher, 
holier, more abiding, that we are to 
work. As Christians, in whatever de- 
partment or of whatever age, we need 
to praise more ; joy sitting in our hearts, 
the language of thankfulness on our lips, 
bursting into song in view of His great 
kindness. His long suffering, the tender- 
ness of His great love. 

To sing with the heart and with the 
understanding is at all times attractive, 
interesting, and profitable. 



cjiGooglc 





The Friends That We Make. 

OOKING into the mirror 

of Grod's word, we find specific 
rules with reference to the 
friends that we make, the in- 
timacies that tighten around 
us, the influences that mould and fash- 
ion. Especially is this to be considered 
in youth, at the time when habits are 
formed and the foundations of character 
laid. As mothers we have seen how 
easily the good resolve was weakened 
through associations with a genial but 
unprincipled companion. An evening 
passed in questionable society has been 
the ruin of many a youth. 



cjiGooglc 



13G WOMAN. 

"Can a roan take fire in his bosom 
and his clothes not he burned ? Can 
one go on hot coals and his feet not be 
burned ?" showing plainly the efi'eet of 
intimate relationship between the vicious 
and the good: "for what fellowship hath 
righteousness with unrighteousness? and 
what communion Lath light with dark- 
ness ? and what concord hath Christ 
with Belial? or what part hath he that 
believeth with an infidel?" "And what 
agreement hath the temple of God with 
iJols ? for ye are the temple of the liv- 
ing God.'' "Wherefore come out from 
among them, and be ye separate, saith 
the Lord.'' "And ye shall be my sons 
and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty." 

The line of demarcation between the 
godly and the ungodly is a distinct one. 
It cannot be broken down. In the 
world, but not of it,, the followers of 
One who went about doing good, the 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE FKIEND8 THAT WE MAKE. 137 

Mend of publicans and sinners, we are 
to imitate Him, "doing good as we liave 
opportunity ;" not holding ourselves ut- 
terly aloof from the erring, but careful 
in our associations that we are the lead- 
ers, not the led ; not in any wise over- 
come of evil. 

There is a love of complacency, and 
a love of benevolence ; the former we 
give to those whom we term our friends, 
persons of like habits and feehngs, their 
peculiar qualities of heart and mind reach- 
ing a deeper and more intimate part of 
us, adapting themselves with a nice fit 
and adjustment to what is characteristic 
in us, so that they are bound to «s 
and we to them by strong and sacred 
ties. 

The love of benevolence implies that 
we love, with a readiness to do good, 
every creature that God has made. If 
evil, so much the more do we strive to 



cjiGooglc 



do them good ; lost sheep of the same 
flock, whom we are with all kindness to 
find and to lead back to the Shepherd 
from whom they have strayed. As iu 
our dwellings we have different guest 
chambers, so with the heart chambers 
it ia the privilege of but few to enter 
the inner sanctuary. Loving all, and 
ready to lay down his life for the most 
unworthy, Jesus had a few friends whom 
he loved with a still tenderer feeling. 
John is spoken of as " the beloved ;"' 
while a peculiar friendship Jesns mani- 
fested for that small family in Bethany. 
If we would arm our children with 
full and complete knowledge, we must 
not shield them from contact with the 
outer world : temptation is a test of vir- 
tue. Standing on the bank the boy will 
never learn to swim. If he would know 
bis strength, he must dive into the deep 
water, he must accustom himself to the 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE FRIENDS THAT WE MAKE. 139 

effort, and it will not be long ere he 
looks upon the waves with a fearless 
eye : he has learned how to breast them. 

The black waves of sin are seething 
all around us. If we would have part 
in the great ingathering, we must be- 
gin, we must suffer our children to be- 
gin. Much good has been accomplished 
through the ministry of the little ones. 
There is little danger but the Fatlier will 
protect us and ours when we are occu- 
pied with his business. God does not 
promise exemption from suffering, neither 
from temptation. His promise is to be 
with us, his grace sufficient in times of 
sorest need. 

As mothers, we cannot expect to re- 
main long with our children. In his prov- 
idence we may soon be called to leave 
them. At best, just as they are fitted 
to be our companions, our helpers, we 
are expected to give them, one by one, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



to the guardianship of others, going 
out from us to build up homes for them- 
selves. A dear-bought privilege, "to 
bear, to rear, and to lose." Little cling- 
ing arms ! never is the mother's heart so 
full of sacred joy, as when she feels your 
clasping, looks down into the dancing 
eyes, the rosy dimpled mouth repos- 
ing so trustingly on her breast. Mes- 
sengers of love lent, not given, to be 
trained and polished for " cornerstones." 
Loving, is it not a mistake to pamper 
them too much? to hedge them round 
with so much luxury that the loss of it 
would leave them oarless and helmless, 
or stranded and broken by the tide ? 

If we would see our daughters pol- 
ished and beautiful, we must train them 
for the battle of life. God's jewels are 
refined in the furnace, they are cut with 
the keen blade of sorrow, they are tiled 
and polished by a long weary process, 



cjiGooglc 



THE FRIENDS THAT WE MAKE. 141 

and only by this are they fitted for the 
crown. 

The family is God's workshop ; pre- 
cious jewels are here to go through the 
polishing process, and a portion of the 
work is assigned to us. Instead of keep- 
ing them in the tower like the crown 
jewels of England, we are to teach them, 
that although young, they are not too 
young to exert a good influence over 
those with whom they have to do; to 
show them the difference between the 
sweet personal intercourse of kindred 
minds, and the large-hearted open be- 
nevolence felt for all, especially the aged, 
the infirm, the helplessly poor and neg- 
lected. 

The want of reverence is a crying sin 
of our times. As mothers, cannot we 
teach our children that respect is due 
the hoary head? Cannot we teach them 
that to listen is in itself an accomplish- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



U2 WOMAN. 

ment unrivalled by its opposite "to talk 
well"? Cannot we show them that the 
sweetest lessons of piety and wisdom 
are to be drawn from sources having 
but little in the exterior to claim the 
eye? 

When Jesus was upon earth he was 
the friend of the poor and the needy, 
the low, even the wicked, lost, doomed 
malefactor. He did not shut himself up 
in a palace, he had not even a cottage 
home, he lacked needed comfort ; he was 
cold and hungry, but never diverted 
from his great work ; he saw the way, 
he knew the agony that was before him. 
But no, he could not turn back. The 
cup given him he must drink, bitter 
though it be : great drops of agony stand- 
ing on that pure brow, like drops of 
blood. 

All this was for us, it was for our 
children. In settling the question with 



cjiGoogic 



THE FlilENDS THAT WE MAKE. 143 

regard to the friends that we make, let 
us aim first of all to make a friend of 
Jesus ; not a nominal friend, but a com- 
panion, known, loved, honored, and con- 
fided in. Let us not rest satisfied until 
each of our children has won the last- 
ing friendship of this same Jesus. Trust- 
ing in him, and guided by his precepts, 
we cannot go astray in making to our- 
selves earthly friends. If we love him 
we shall not be inclined to take into the 
inner sanctuary of the heart one who 
does not regard Him whom our soul lov- 
eth. What communion could there be ? 
linked but still apart ; drinking at differ- 
ent cisterns: eating, but not of the same 
bread. 

If we would be eager to secure the 
friendship of Jesus for our children, let 
us in their very babyhood give them in 
prayer and faith to him; claiming the 
promise, ''all things whatsoever ye shall 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



ask in prayer believing, ye shall re- 
ceive;" teaching them in all things, so 
that their walk may be in keeping with 
the written word. 

A mother who had brought up a large 
family of children, all of whom had be- 
come members of the Christian fold, was 
asked what means she had used with so 
much success, to win them to the cross. 
She replied: "I have always felt that if 
they were not converted before they be- 
came seven or eight years of age, they 
would probably be lost; and when they 
have approached that age, I have been 
in an agony lest they should pass it 
unconverted. I have gone to the Lord 
in my anguish, and he has not turned 
away my prayers, nor his mercy from 
me." 

Oh, the happiness of such a mother ! 
The sweet communion of such a family, 
heaven begun upon earth — living and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



THE FKIENDS THAT WE MAKE. 145 

working to promote the same object, 
seeking the poor, the weak, the miser- 
able, and leading them to Jesus. To 
the old and hardened in sin, little chil- 
dren are angel ministers'; their sweet 
lispings of Jesus touch the obstinate 
heart. They listen as they would not 
to the mature Christian ; they confide 
in the trusting child-love; they do not 
think of questioning, they do not sus- 
pect artifice; and often, the arrow once 
lodged in their hearts, they do not rest 
till they have found an interest in the 
same Saviour. 

God does not need man's intellect ; the 
power of his Spirit is not shown through 
the wisdom of this world. ■' Out of the 
mouth of babes and sucklings hast thou, 
ordained strength."' The smallest stars 
are nearest to the great centre, little 
arms cling the closest, and little children 
often excel us ; their simple artless ques- 

w™,-. 10 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



tions are like nails fastened in a sure 
place. In G-ertnide's home, her fre- 
quent entertainments are given. Had I 
been skeptical with reference to what a 
child can do, 'I should have been con- 
vinced by seeing what she has already 
accomplished. 

Colonel H- — —had just returned from 
a long residence abroad. A man of 
rare native ability and inheriting large 
wealth, he was favored with extensive 
mental culture. Universities and col- 
leges bestowed their favors, and society 
oifered a charmed cup. Elegant in man- 
ner, fascinating in appearance. Colonel 
H was an infidel. His understand- 
ing could not take in the sublime truths 
of the gospel, and because ho could not 
comprehend, he scouted it entirely, and 
for years the Bible was to him a sealed 

book. Colonel H made his home 

in the family by whom Gertrude was 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



THE FBIENDS THAT WE MAKE. 147 

adopted. His heart was won by the 
sweet beauty of the child, and when she 
slid her hand into his and asked him to 
go with her to church, and to the mis- 
sion-school, he could not refuse. The 
idea of good was not in his heart. A 
man of the world,'petted by society, with 
a balanced mind and well-established 
principles, to be led by a child ! No, of 
course he would never change ; but Ger- 
trude asked him, and he loved the child. 
Months passed. Colonel H— was 
ill, nigh unto death. His little frieod 
was with him, her sensitive nature was 
touched, and in her sweet artless man- 
ner did she ask Jesus in behalf of her 
sick friend. As he grew better she 
curled herself up beside him, and read 
from her small Bible. She told him of 
Jesus, her own precious friend. Her 
maimer was simple and direct; the heart 
of the invalid was tender, he saw the 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



preciousness of such a Friend, he longed 
to claim him for his own. 

"Only love him," whispered Gertrnde. 

"But will he let me?" 

"I love you!" whispered Gertrude. 

"But Jesus I have slighted for so 
many years, I am afraid that he will 
refuse me now!" 

"Afraid of Jesus I Why it 's because 
you do n't know him. All the days that 
you was ill, he was right here ; I used to 
ask him for you every day, and he loved 
you, or he would n't have let you get 
well. Do love him just a little bit;" 
and burying her face in the pillow the 
little one wept. 

It was a new idea to Colonel H -. 

Did he in reality owe his life to Jesus ? 
and the question once started could not 
be put aside. A breach once made, the 
strong barrier of infidelity gradually 
crumbled away, the strong man saw 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



THE FRIENDS THAT WE MAKE. 149 

himself a sinnei" in the sight of G-od, an 
ingrate, lost, ruined, undone, without a 
Mediator. For a time he was almost 
in despair. "I, even I, am he that 
comforteth you," whispered Gertrude. 
" Though your sins be as scarlet, they 
shall be white as snow; though they be 
red like crimson, they shall be as wool." 
Blessed little teacher, leading the man 
of intellect to Jesus. Well might Colo- 
nel H say, as he did say in giving 

in his Christian experience, "It was not 
by might, neither the wisdom of the 
world, nor the pride of intellect; but by 
his Spirit and the teaching of a little 
child." 



cjiGooglc 





Self-Denial. 

^HE lesson of self-denial is of 
the utmost importance in lay- 
the groundwork of a good, 
noble character for our children. 
Self, and the importance that 
attaches to personal gratification, is a 
weed of such strong growth, that unless 
early attention is given it, a judicious 
pruning and lopping of the overgrown 
leaves, they will effectually shut out the 
sunshine from the flowers, and mar their 
beauty and harmony. 

Surely, some one says, we are not 
to expect our children to understand the 
true principles of self-denial, and under- 



cjiGooglc 



SELF-DENIAL, 151 

standing, thus be brought to practise it. 
Why not? Is not the germ of goodness 
the same ? The oak was once a sapling ; 
the man was once a babe : in either case 
the change was gradual. The sapling 
grew and was counted by years ; the 
babe grew slowly, by degrees. When the 
oak was a sapling, it could be swayed and 
bent and made to grow straight or crook- 
ed. By a process known to gardeners, 
it could have been dwarfed, and still have 
been harmonious in all its parts. Un- 
natural as such a growth would be, it 
would have remained an oak. No pro- 
cess could change its nature. 

Is it not thus with the child? Like 
the sapling, can he not be swayed and 
bent and made to grow straight or crook- 
ed ? In either case, if we would have a 
perfect development, there must be no 
forced growth. To train is all that is 
required. As in the oak all the limbs 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



do not make their appearance at the 
same time, so in the child the inclina- 
tions and native tendencies do not show 
themselves at once. Selfishness is radi- 
cal, however ; the babe in our arms gives 
ample proof. Look how he clutches the 
toy ; he will not yield it. " Mine, mine !" 
he cries, and hugging it in his arms, he 
exerts his strength to retain it. True, 
some children show more of this propen- 
sity than others ; but on every page of 
human nature self is written in charac- 
ters more or less defined. This princi- 
ple is needful to an extent. We do not 
wish to destroy and uproot it, but to 
prune and tend it, keeping it under; for 
if left to run wild, it will so shadow the 
virtues as materially to affect the fruit. 

Looking into the sacred volume, we 
find that self-denial is made the condi- 
tion of discipleship by our Saviour, so 
that, unless in some degree we practise 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



SELF-DENIAL. 153 

it, our claim to the character and privi- 
leges of Christians is invalid. But what 
is its nature ? 

Self-denial, when practised through 
love or for the sake of a loved object, 
has nothing austere or ascetic. It does 
not call for pilgrimages, hardships, and 
seclusion ; neither has it a sour look and 
crabbed appearance. By self-denial, we 
mean a persevering effort to conform de- 
sire, appetite, and temper to the require- 
ment of God's word; content with our 
lot, resigned to providential appoint- 
ment, submissive to God as to a Father, 

But why must our children deny them- 
selves? So that they may early acquire 
this grace, esteeming others better than 
themselves, giving with a generous hand, 
finding pleasure in seeing others happy. 
Otherwise they may grow up to be penu- 
rious, grasping, forgetful that the Father 
of mercies not only beholds, but gra- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



ciously promises to reward the good that 
is done in his name ; teaching our chil- 
dren not only to embrace opportunities 
to do good, but to create them, and be 
thus always abounding in the work of 
the Lord. 

The boy that divides his books or his 
toys with those who have less, not only 
does a praiseworthy act, but he is laying 
the foundation for a noble, generous man- 
hood. The girl that gives her doll to 
the sick child of a poor neighbor, reaps 
a pleasure that she could not from any 
other source, and will most likely grow 
into a full, free, generous-hearted woman. 

Many parents are in the habit of giv- 
ing freely, and also lead their children 
to give in the same munificent manner. 
Said a lady, "I never knew any thing of 
the spirit of self-denial until I was under 
the necessity of earning for myself. As 
a child, 1 was in the habit of giving free- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



SELF-DENIAL. 155 

ly; but it was of my superfluity. Did I 
give any thing to the cause of humanity, 
my parents took occasion to supply me 
with something more valuable, and more 
highly prized because of its freshness." 

We need not say that there is nothing 
of self-denial in such giving. "Whatever 
the circumstances of the parent, in order 
to learn the lesson of self-denial the gift 
of the child must be coupled with per- 
sonal effort or sacrifice. Above all, he 
is to feel that it is for Christ's sake. If 
he has already given himself to Christ, 
it will not require many words to con- 
vince him of the beauty as well as of the 
necessity of doing good without selfish- 
ness. 

God loves a cheerful giver. Let the 
object of our bounty see that it is love 
that inspires us. The kindness with 
which a favor is bestowed will double 
the value of it with a grateful receiver. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



Hence the beautiful exhortation, "He 
that giveth, let him do it with simplici- 
ty;" that is, witliout extolling or deba- 
sing his gift ; without ostentation, without 
pride. Let our children understand that 
God expects us to give according to our 
means ; pennies will not do for one who 
has pounds. The gift of a flower, a leaf, 
if one has nothing more, has power to 
mould character and to form habit. 

Merely giving is but a small part of 
what is understood by self-denial. In 
every family, not a day but calls for the 
practice of this virtue — at the table and 
in the parlor, the small preferences, the 
cosiest chair at the fire, the favorite seat 
at the window, the coveted place on 
papa's knee, the seat in the carriage 
when all cannot go, the rare fruit or del- 
icate viand. On occasions like these, 
how beautiful to observe the spirit of 
self-denial, the oldest giving preference 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



SELF-DENIAL. 157 

to the youngest, the strongest to the 
weakest, each vying with the other for 
the pleasure and practice of self-denial. 

If our children are thus accustomed in 
their j'outh, may we not expect that 
they will not depart from such a course, 
as they grow to be men and women, in 
their turn to teach and to lead others ? 

Ill almost every neighborhood there 
are families more or less destitute, people 
of genuine worth in many respects, but 
crippled for the want of means; without 
friends, without boolcs, without every 
thing save the bare necessaries of life. 
An occasional call, a few books left as a 
loan, a garment fitted and made to look 
becomingly, a few words of friendly ad- 
vice or suggestion, cost nothing save a 
little self-denial, and throw a world of 
sunshine over the humble home. 

In evei-y locality, and especially among 
the destitute, there are more or less chil- 



cjiGoogic 



158 WOMAN. 

dren unable to go to school. Could there 
be a purer pleasure than to gather these 
little waifs into a comfortable room and 
instrnct them, teaching them to sew, to 
knit, as well as to read and study? A 
little self-denial by one who has the 
leisure, and the entire neighborhood is 
remodelled and made to wear a very 
different aspect. 

Many a sick-room has been bright- 
ened, the heart of the sufferer filled with 
hope, the hands strengthened, by the 
timely aid that came through the prac- 
tice of self-denial by a prosperous neigh- 
bor. Little deeds like these done by our 
children, will be worth to them more 
than houses and lands without them. 
Life is not long .enough to indulge in self- 
ishness; and still, to do good is not a 
natural growth ; it is the effect of teach- 
ing. This spirit fostered in our homes 
tends fo broad and enlightened views. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



SELF-DENIAL. 159 

Yisiting the sick and the suffering, a 
habit of listening is formed — no mean 
accomplishment, as may be found in after 
years; and also the power of winning 
attention— an easy assimilation and adap- 
tation to others and to their groove of 
thought. The mind needs unresisting, 
merely listening attention for its devel- 
opment; and this is found on reading to 
those whose understanding, for the want 
of culture, does not enable them to de- 
tect flaws or to make criticisms, but 
merely to enjoy, and in a measure to 
profit by what is given them. 

It is an aphorism worthy of a deep 
and permanent impression on our hearts, 
that self-denial is the source of our high- 
est gratification. 



cjiGooglc 





School Life. 

-^HERE is no more critical 
period in childhood, perhaps, 
than when the question of school 
and school duties is first agita- 
ted ; when we send our children 
away from our immediate care and pro- 
tection, and share the labor and respon- 
sibility with another, and that other a 
stranger, but partially known at best, 
and frequently not at all. 

It had been -our care to instruct the 
children. Margaret could read and write 
correctly, and Jem was ready for Latin ; 
Maude had outgrown the name of "ba- 
by;" a last year's nursling was in my 



cjiGooglc 



SCHOOL LIFE. 161 

arms ; and with such increase of care, I 
could no longer do justice to their les- 
sons. The question had frequently been 
asked, and now we felt it must be an- 
swered, "Can we place our children 
among strangers ? Shall we keep them at 
home, or send them to the public school?" 
Each plan had its advantages and its 
drawbacks. Margaret and Jem were 
not widely divided in their studies ; they 
had been in the same class. We did not 
like to separate them. We could not 
think of sending them from home. Each 
would serve as mentor to the other — ■ 
Jem's mirth toned down to a gentl'e deco- 
rum by his sister's speech; ■while Maude 
would lean upon both, and at home I 
should feel better satisfied. 

Try as I would, it was hard to see 

them go ; and holding Birdie up, my 

hungry eyes followed them out of sight — 

"away from all who love them." It was 

11 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



their first step into the world, and a 
quiclc pang shot through my heart as 
they went — Margaret with her tender 
eyes, and Jem noble and manly, as he 
always had been at home; but I knew 
him to be quick and irascible, feeling 
intensely, and sometimes rash, but when 
he did a wrong so truly sorry ; and 
stretching out my arms, I longed to take 
him — to take them all to my sheltering 
heart. 

It was a quick thought, and shot up- 
ward like a flame, wrapping me in with 
doubts and fears, and almost niurmur- 
ings. How could I let thera go, my 
priceless jewels ? What if stain or long 
and ugly scar should mar the work? 
The tears streamed down my face. The 
work was mine to rear and train them 
all ; to fit them for the world, and thus 
for a place in heaven. I could not hope 
to keep them with me. At best the path 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



SCHOOL LIFE. 163 

through life would be a tangled one. But 
He in whom we trusted would lead and 
guide and teach. It was a sweet thought, 
and all at once my mind was calm. My 
babes were His to keep, and mine to 
teach them not to wander from his side. 

As the sun went down the children 
came from school, a certain awe and 
wonder in their eyes ; so much they had 
to tell, and Maude was very sure .she 'd 
love the littie girl "in the red dress and 
pretty soft brown hair ;"■ and the teacher 
was kind and good, like mamma. I took 
her to my heart and hugged her close, 
my blue-eyed Maude ; and a yearning 
love went out to that fair teacher, "kind 
and good, like mamma." 

Jem told us of the sports at recess, and 
that he could run as fast as the fastest, 
and throw a ball; and cricket he could 
[earn, did papa think it suitable for such 
a boy. All the time Margaret's face 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



wore a look of such sweet gravity. I 
could not but kiss the child, and ask of 
the lessons, Were they difficult and hard 
to learn? With this she opened her 
Latin grammar, pointing to "Amo." 
"That is all, and Jem must take 'Mu- 
sa.' " It was a pleasant evening running 
through "Amo ;" first papa and myself, 
then Margaret, and at last Jem's facile 
tongue rang out the changes on "Musa" 
as though it had been his mother tongue. 
The next day I was happier, sending 
my thought out oa a pleasanter track. 
Gertrude was with them, and Professor 
Islam was to give vocal lessons in the 
same school. And their influence, if 
we were careful to keep it pure at home, 
would show itself like some clear stream ; 
at first a tiny brook, but widening as it 
grew, freshening the fields and giving 
beauty to the wayside flowers. Was 
not this our end and aim? And thus 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



SCHOOL LIFE. 165 

far God had blessed us. Why distrust V 
I grew to loathe my fear, and pressed 
near to ask for gifts. I held his prom- 
ise, "Ask," and I knew his word could 
never fail. 

As school life advanced, we became 
more intimately acquainted with the 
teachers, and my heart went out to this 
class as it had never done before. I saw 
that some held teaching as a high and 
sacred office, and others looked upon it 
as a means to live. But why expect any 
class, or all of a class, to be free from 
fault ? A teacher's responsibility is only 
second to that of the mother ; and as 
mothers we see much in our own hearts 
that we would have otherwise. Motives 
are the criterion, however, and that one 
does most good who uniformly acts from 
the highest, purest motives. 

It was said by a man of eminent worth 
that every step of life is a discipline, 



cjiGooglc 



106 WOMAN. 

every breath a refiner. Pleasant as stu- 
dent life may be, it has its dangers. Am- 
bitions to excel, the scholar not unfre- 
quently runs into gross error; and to 
hide this he practises still another, and 
another, until he becomes an adept in 
duplicity and falsehood in every degree, 
and for every purpose. It is so easy, if 
the pupil has a difficult or a disagreeable 
duty, to stay away from class ; and if the 
reason is asked, as it is sure to be, to 
plead illness is almost natural when the 
pupil understands that an engagement 
will not answer. If the rules are so 
stringent as only to be satisfied with a 
written communication from the parent, 
it is easy to ask and obtain an excuse. 
Otherwise the daughter herself writes, 
signs her mother's name, and it is done. 
The first instance, conscience most likely 
cries out against it as unjust, dishonora- 
ble, and highly injurious to the pupil. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



SCHOOL LIFE. 167 

The Lext, the voice is less strong, and 
at length it ceases to speak. 

To excel in composition is a natural 
desire ; fancy is excited, imagination 
stimulated, intellect awakened. The 
effusion of the youthful writer is praised ; 
prophets rise up, and down the future 
the young aspirant for literary honors 
sends her gaze ; lights are flashing, and 
garlands of beauty to crown her brow. 
With extended research, she clips to suit 
herself, and before she is aware she has 
dropped from the height she was so sure 
to win. 

Perhaps there is no time when we 
should so closely attach ourselves to our 
daughters as during the period of school 
life, offering ourselves as companions, 
studying with them, sympathizing with 
them, winning their confidence. Natu- 
rally demonstrative, the school girl must 
have some one to love and to confide in. 



cjiGooglc 



168 WOMAN. 

With a character still uiiformed, she 
cannot herself judge of her associates 
except so far as the exterior is concern- 
ed. A sad thing if she has not a mother 
■who can be touched with her need, who 
can enter into all her petty trials, who 
can understand the peculiar temptitions 
liable to meet her every day; a mother 
willing to watch the springs of action, 
keeping the soul from the miasma of 
wrong influence by well-timed speech 
and example. 

Many a young girl has taken her first 
downward step while at school. Suscep- 
tible and easily pleased, she often forms 
acquaintances that are worse than profit- 
less. At first it is only a chance meeting 
going to and from school ; then growing 
bolder, her new' friend lends her books, 
or offers a bouquet. Nothing could be 
more respectful. The girl is unsuspect- 
ing; but the chain is being forged that 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



SCHOOL LIFE. 169 

will tighten around the delicate form, and 
at last sink her with its terrible weight. 

As mothers, we have need of all our 
powers. While we sit idle the enemy is 
sowing tares. The great Gardener who 
gave us this vine to train will come to 
question us with reference to our work. 
The gem given us to polish will be re- 
quired at our hands. The bird we were 
to teach to sing will be wanting in para- 
dise, if we are unfaithful. 

These are but few of the avenues 
whereby wrong creeps into student life. 
Not infrequently the love of dress is 
fostered ; vanity fed into a flame ; ro- 
mance and sentiment give false views 
of the reality and responsibility of life. 
Said a pious woman, in speaking of her 
daughter : " I consider the period of 
school-gir] life the most beautiful and 
the most dangerous in the path of wom- 
an." If this is true, and our own expe- 



cjiGoogic 



170 WOMAN. 

ricnce goes to sustain it, must we not 
seek to lay the foundation before our 
daughters go from us ? 

Perhaps there is no one thing that 
needs more careful watch than the so- 
called recreation, the unbending from 
study, the refreshment and diversion, 
the picking up a book light as foam and 
brilliant with false glare. Such read- 
ing, although but momentary, tends to 
deaden the soul, to dwarf the intellect, 
to benumb the senses, leaving the ima- 
gination to take the lead; and thus the 
advantages of which the student might 
have availed herself prove only swift 
messengers leading down to death. Said 
a mother, in speaking of the popular 
romances of the day : " I am thankful 
that ray daughter does not read them." 

"Are you sure?" asked a friend, who 
understood the child much better than 
the mother did. 



cjiGooglc 



SCHOOL LIFE. 171 

"Oh, yes, I am sure; she gives her 
time to her lessons. I have been partic- 
ularly careful. She never reads novels." 

Deception was perfect in this ease ; 
the mother did not know. A conscien- 
tious woman, she did not dream that her 
daughter would read by stealth, devoting 
study hours to her lessons, and sitting up 
half the night poring over books sure to 
leave stains on her soul. 

Another evil, but happily not so fre- 
quent as years ago, is an undue love of 
study. Led on by conscientious motives, 
anxious to make the most of present op- 
portunity, the poor girl studies, heedless 
■of law, unknowing, at least unthinking, 
that if nature is taxed wrongfully, she 
will be avenged. Neither will the mind 
bear consecutivehours of unbroken study. 
Progress is not of forced growth. So 
much as the mind can digest, patiently 
persevered in, will accomplish the desire ; 



cjiGooglc 



but study that becomes a tax, through 
weariness of brain and muscle, docs no 
good ; more than this, it clogs the brain, 
and therefore weakens it. As a rule, in 
mental effort, when weary, rest is neces- 
sary. To sit passive is not always re- 
quired ; change gives the mind a respite. 
In this way thought will strengthen, the 
taxed energies regain their vigor ; and 
the advance will be all the more marked 
for what at first may seem lost time. 

True, there are cases where the strength 
and activity of the mental powers hold 
the body in abeyance— souls that sit and 
sing, regardless of the frail tenement that 
shelters them; but these are exceptions. 
God may have a work for such, and will 
care for them. Cannot we teach our 
daughters the happy mean, and at length 
have the satisfaction of seeing them rud- 
dy and strong, yet with minds vigorous, 
well cultivated, and quick to grasp great 



cjiGooglc 



SCHOOL LIFE. 173 

and essential truths? Cannot we teach 
them, that the responsibility of woman's 
life calls for health of body and a well- 
disciplined mind; that good sense and 
strong nerves are preferable to a weaXi 
sentimentality, a shattered, irritable ner- 
vous system ? God has given us a world 
of beauty, and he has so ordered it that 
the path, however humble, is not desti- 
tute of enjoyment. The way cannot be 
lonely that is brightened by his pres- 
ence ; the heart that is filled with his 
love has no cause for uneasiness. To 
advance in mental culture, and secure a 
growth of grace in the soul, reaching out 
after what is holier and higher ; not un- 
mindful to teach and to lead ; in all things 
good showing herself a pattern ; this is 
the grand aim and end of woman's life. 



cjiGooglc 





Habit. 

^F childhood is the time to lay 
foundations, the forming time for 
strong pure character and abi- 
ding principle, it is likewise the 
time for habit to fasten itself: a 
mere trifle, an excrescence that at first 
can be removed easily ; but if permitted 
to harden it cannot be amputated with- 
out the knife and the danger at least 
of a scar. In our children we see little 
idiosyncrasies peculiar to this or that 
parent or relation ; a certain peculiarity 
so exact that it is noticeable, and we 
exclaim, "How very like!" the look, ex- 



cjiGoogic 



pression, or fac-simile of the person in 
question. In other instances it is an im- 
itation, a parasite attaching itself to us, 
sure to cling and to grow. It may come 
fi'om Bridget in the kitchen or Patrick 
at the stable ; or it may come from the 
nursery-maid or hei" street acquaintance. 
Where it originated is of secondary im- 
portance ; it is there. To remove it is 
our work. It may be the squint of the 
eye, a peculiar curl to the lip, an un- 
pleasant shrug of the shoulders, a wry 
face, stammering, one or all of these ; 
like the measles or smallpox, of slight 
importance if attended to in time ; but 
■ allowed to increase, dangerous to the 
well-being of the child. 

Habit does not attach itself to the out- 
ward exclusively ; slang phrases and low 
forms of speech, especially when flavored 
with witticism, find quick appreciation 
with children. The half-formed espres- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



176 WOMAN. 

sion, meaningless as they use it, not un- 
usually provokes merriment, causing a 
laugh that encourages them to attempt 
it again. Such a course, if persisted in, 
may close the child's mind, to any thing 
better. Like his seniors, he loves to be 
ajiplauded ; and if by using a cant ex- 
pression or a slang phrase he succeeds 
in winning a laugh, be sure that he will 
repeat it, and before you are aware, he 
becomes an adept, his entire speech of 
the same type and quality. 

With the gardener it is not enough 
that he prunes and lops ; not a day 
escapes but he looks and examines. >The 
more valuable the vine the closer is his 
scrutiny, change of temperature will 
affect it; too much sunshine and too lit- 
tle moisture wither it ; insects may ruin 
it, or dust disfigure it. It is the business 
of the gardener to keep it fresh and vig- 
orous, and he gives it the needful care. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HABIT. 177 

Is it not thus with the plants growing 
about our doors ? general pruning and 
culture are not sufficient, we must watch 
closely, lest some rude unsightly thing 
mar the beauty of the leaf, or eat into 
the heart of the bud. We cannot leave 
them to other hands, we cannot rest with- 
out knowing for ourselves that they are 
safe. 

Especially do we see the effect of 
habit when our children begin to associ- 
ate with others at school or on the street. 
A new thing it was to see Jem come 
into the parlor, his hat tipped to one 
side, his hands in his pockets, an easy 
do n't-care manner, whistling as he goes. 

" Why, Jem, you forget yourself. 
Mamma would not, like to see you come 
in in this manner," said Margaret. 

It does no good; Jem whistles only 
the louder. 

"Howard Paul never takes off his hat 

ff^-a 12 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



178 WOMAN, 

in the house, and he whistles. He says 
it's being cheerful." 

It's being cheerfuller not to do it, I 
should think," and Maude chimes in, 
running up to Jem and attempting to 
lift his hat. 

"No, you don't;" and Jem straight- 
ens himself up, and throws back bis 
head. 

Jem had no idea that mamma saw 
this new exhibition of manliness ; but he 
tried to look brave. 

" Did my little boy ever see papa 
enter the parlor with his hands in his 
pockets, whistling, and wearing his hat?" 

"I never do so away from home; it 
don't matter with only us." 

"So it don't matter if you make mam- 
ma and the little sisters unhappy." 

" Such little things should n't make 
anybody unhappy." 

"Have you forgotten what papa was 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



telling us about the temple, how every 
little block fitted into its place, with no 
two blocks just alike. Have you forgot- 
ten ?" 

" No, mamma;" and Jem's eyes were 
full of tears; "I know what you would 
say, our bodies are temples, and every 
thing we do makes them beautiful or it 
makes them ugly, and this makes me 
ugly ;" and flinging his arms around my 
neck, he hid his brown face in my dress. 

An impulsive child, I tremble for him; 
and still he is quick to feel, and sorry 
for a fault. Howard Paul is a dearly 
loved playmate, petted by a too-indul- 
gent aunt that stands to him in the rela- 
tion of mother. I sometimes wish that 
he lived not so near; but Howard has 
no mother, and my heart yearns over 
him. "What would become of Jem if 
petted like Howard Paul ? 

There is a habit of saying disagreea- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



ble things, that sometimes creeps into 
the family circle ; an undue love of teaz- 
ing, that if fostered will grow into a 
habit by no means praiseworthy. Not 
only children, but grown people fall into 
this habit, always ready to make known 
an unwelcome truth : people who pride 
themselves on saying what they think, 
regardless of another's feelings ; their 
conscience quieted, if indeed it is dis- 
turbed, by saying, "Well, it is true." As 
though the truth could be proclaimed at 
any time, and in all circumstances. 

"Why did you tell Miss Wise that 
her hair was gray?" "Because it is." 
"Why remind Mrs. Hartley that her 
dress was faded ?" " I saw it." " Why 
did yon refer to that article in the news- 
paper when S was near?" "Be- 
cause I had just read it." "Why did 
you tell Putnam that you met his old 
chum and rival?" "For the reason that 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



I did meet him." Candid and true ; but 
why say it ? raking up old wounds and 
canker-sores in the room of sitting in 
the sunshine of pleasant thoughts and 
friendly interchange of views and feel- 
ings. Many who unconsciously have the 
habit of saying disagreeable things, are 
in the main well-meaning people. They 
have no idea how their words cut ; they 
are disappointed, and, looking for blem- 
ishes, they are sure to find them. 

True, there are occasions when the 
truth must be told, independent of per- 
sonal feeling; for instance, when justice 
is to be done to an injured or accused 
party, or when, through ambiguity, there 
is misunderstanding 'that can be put right 
by a few timely words. But this is very 
different from the habit of saying disa- 
greeable things with a spirit of malice, 
or even of sport, and for the sake of 
lessening enjoyment. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



The granij centre for the display of 
this habit is the domestic hearth'; where, 
giving loose rein to disappointed feeling, 
unawed by strangers and unrestrained 
by laws of good breeding, parents and 
children, brothers and sisters, scatter 
words that burn into the heart and brain, 
and think no more of it than of eating 
their daily food. Unpleasant as this pic- 
ture is, it is not overdrawn. We all 
have known families where the individ- 
ual members, if not absolutely rude and 
disagreeable in their daily intercourse, 
were far from being as pleasant and as 
kind as to strangers. If this is the habit 
of the parent, we can scarcely blame the 
children if they fall'into the same habit. 

In teaching our children that home is 
the place to exhibit good breeding, we 
must not fail to show them that genuine 
politeness belongs rather to the heart 
than to the head. The true code of eti- 



cjiGoogic 



qnette is found in the Bible ; the rules 
are brief' and easily remembered. The 
spirit of politeness is essentially the 
spirit of the gospel, gentle, kind, tender, 
charitable, "in honor preferring one an- 
other." By teaching our children this 
code, and being careful ourselves to 
abide by it, habits will be formed which 
will render home happier, and give a 
new charm to social influence. In order 
to establish this spirit we must have the 
confidence of our children, meeting them 
as friends to whom they can whisper 
their inmost thoughts. As companions 
adapting ourselves to their preferences 
and sj'mpathies, winning them to rely 
upon our judgment, to trust in our taste, 
to be satisfied with our arrangements. 
This intimate companionship is the only 
way that we can know our children thor- 
oughly, reading their thoughts in the 
expression of their countenances, and 



cjiGooglc 



184 WOMAN. 

wisely adapting our words to the neces- 
sities of each. 

Love is not only a polisher, but it is 
the lamp that brings to light rare powers 
of mind and soul. Genius is a plant ol 
delicate growth ; and talent needs the 
sweet appreciation of love to stimulate 
exertion. We may uot know the full 
value of the encouragement we give our 
children. A trifling assistance in a hard 
lesson ; the easy rendering of a transla- 
tion ; disentangling a problem in geome- 
try; explaining, in a simple manner, a 
philosophic argument or a chemical ex- 
periment: these are little things in them- 
selves, but mighty in their influences. 

To do this effectively our minds must 
be stored with knowledge. It will not 
answer to say 'that we have studied. 
Study must be habitual. AVe must not 
suffer ourselves to fall behind the spirit 
of the age. To keep pace with the 



cjiGoogic 



young fresh minds around us, we must 
keep our intellects bright and our hearts 
active, alive, glowing. Care, anxiety, 
fretfulness, repining, must not he suf- 
fered to spoil the sweet influences of 
home. Leading others, we must our- 
selves be led, looking to God continual- 
ly — each thought a supplication, each 
breath a prayer. We must permit our 
children to see, that active and resolute 
as we are in the world, to them we are 
always kind and considerate, benevolent 
and charitable ; that there is a mystic 
inner chamber into which they alone can 
enter, where heaven is brought nearer, 
with its glorious hopes ; so that they shall 
be stimulated, encouraged, and led up 
through the inner sanctuary of a moth- 
er's heart. 



cjiGooglc 





C onver sati on. 

i^Y conversation, we do not 
mean here any thing be- 
yond the easy, familiar inter- 
course of everyday life. In 
this the children are to have a 
part ; to be free to speak their thoughts 
or to ask questions, provided they do it 
in a- respectful, courteous manner, and 
with due regard to the proprieties of 
time and place. Children are men and 
women in miniature ; they think, see, 
and feel very 'much as their seniors 
think, see, and feel, with the advantage 
that the child has of living in a world 
bright, radiant, joyous. To him every 



cjiGoogic 



CONVEESATION. 187 

tiling is beautiful, A philosopher in his 
way, he grasps all that he is able to 
digest, and enjoys without surfeit. Every 
day his curiosity is fed with a display of 
mechanism that he cannot understand, 
marvels of beauty that he cannot un- 
ravel. The reflection in the mirror leads 
the infant to look behind it— a strange 
wonder on his face as he fmds nothing 
but a plain board with dust and spiders' 
webs. The murmur of the shell hushes 
him into quiet, and his eager little mind 
cannot be satisfied unless he finds the 
singer. Alas, the shell is ruined, and 
our little philosopher is no wiser. Vio- 
lently to repress the feeling of such a 
child is to injure him for life. Listen 
patiently to his questions ; there is wis- 
dom in them, and the answer will not 
always be as easy a matter as we some- 
times think. 

Families there are where the children 



cjiGooglc 



creep in and out of the rooms, shy, timid, 
if a stranger enters ; or wild and boister- 
ous, taking the advantage it would seem, 
when visitors are by, to enjoy a little 
liberty without fear of rebuke or pun- 
ishment. If we would have our children 
civil when guests are in the house, we 
must teach them to be amiable in the 
home circle. If we would have them 
speak becomingly, we must permit them 
to speak freely ; the stream that is dam- 
med up will, when it breaks away, rush 
with maddening force across the valley: 
undue repression has the same effect 
upon the child; and when he breaks 
away, as he surely will, a wild, boister- 
ous life may be the result. 

Speech is the natural avenue of thought ; 
it is the means by which we become ac- 
quainted with our friends, making our- 
selves familiar with them and their pecu- 
liar forms of thought. This is the charm 



cjiGooglc 



CONVERSATIOK. 189 

of friendship ; a fitting in of two natures 
by an easy, mutual adaptation to eacli 
other, harmonizing and blending them 
so that though different and individual, 
they are still by this mystical adapta- 
tion wrought into a degree of oneness, 
like the waves of the great deep. 

Ties of relationship are not always the 
bond for such intimate soul union; in- 
deed, a union of soul exists frequently 
where there is no such relationship. But 
is this incompatible with the relation in 
which we stand to our children ? Can- 
not we gain and keep the sweet, pure 
confidence of childhood? Cannot we 
take them into our hearts as friends, 
adapting ourselves to their wants and 
needs, sharing with them those choice 
gifts and warmer intimacies that will 
call out responsive qualities on their 
part? Our children are our mirrors, 
reflecting our own moods and inequali- 



cjiGoogic 



190 WOMAN. 

ties, as well as the nobler attributes of 
our nature. If we would stand to them 
in the place of mother, friend, compan- 
ion, we must talk with them as well as 
to them. "We must listen with easy, art- 
less, unconscious attention, as their very 
being is unwound and laid before us. 
Then and then only are we in possession 
of a knowledge that will enable us to 
help them day by day ; and in our efforts 
to profit our children, we shall ourselves 
be profited. 

Not long since we were invited to 
spend a day with a lady of most estima- 
ble general character. Her house was 
duly ordered, her dinner unexceptiona- 
ble, her manner sweetly affectionate, her 
conversation elevating ; but her children, 
two attractive ' little girls, seemed like 
strangers. At length, after much coax- 
ing, I succeeded in making a slight ac- 
quaintance. But while the little one 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



CONVERSATION. 191 

received my caresses she seldom spoke, 
and then with a covert, painful look, as 
though she expected a rebuke if she 
opened her lips. In the course of the 
evening conversation turned upon home, 
and the delight we all feel in seeing 
children bright and happy. 

"Tour children are extremely quiet," 
I ventured to remark, 

"Quiet because I keep them quiet; 
they would be wild as hawks if I let 
them have their own way." 

"Then it is their nature to be bright 
and gay." 

" Always asking questions, never still; 
I never saw such children ; it would 
just take all my time to answer them." 

"If you should take the time, would 
it not cause their lives to run in a 
smoother and more even groove ? Would 
not their little minds be relieved, their 
thoughts run out on pleasant subjects, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



and their hearts be sensibly brighten- 
ed V 

"Surely you do not think that I wrong 
my children by trying to keep them 
quiet and well-behaved ?" said the lady. 

"1 was thinking that it was possible 
you did not take sufficient pains to be- 
come thoroughly acquainted with their 
Individual nature, making friends of 
them, and talking with thera in the same 
easy, graceful, elevating manner you 
talk with me." 

" Of course not ; children are not ex- 
pected to understand these things." 

' ' The heart of the child longs for sym- 
pathy and love in the little engagements 
of life, as much as the mother longs for 
sympathy and love in the duties that 
devolve upon her. Questions that the 
mother can readily answer, weigh heav- 
ily on the young spirit ; and tbe small 
but uncared-for needs pressing back 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



CONVERSATION. 193 

upon the brain, wiii not only dwarf in- 
tellectual growth and vigor, but will 
promote inequalities of temper and char- 
acter." 

' ' But my children are young ; as they 
grow older I see that they will require 
more." 

"More in quantity; the quality of the 
mind and heart will he the same. Sym- 
pathy is what they need, the grand in- 
spirer and mainspring in our common 
nature." 

" Perhaps I have erred in this mat- 
ter. I did not think that children felt 
the need of sympathy the same as those 
who are older." 

"Watch your child as she plays with 
her dolls. Did ypu ever see her soil a 
dress or break an arm ? Look at the 
tears, the anguish in the small, upturned 
face. She runs to you for sympathy; 
she will never know more real sorrow, 
w™«.. 13 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



194 WOMAN. 

she will never more liigWy appreciate 
your love. She will remember it, It 
will mould and fashion her future life." 

Are not too many mothers following 
(he example of this one, feeling that 
their children are too young to be treat- 
ed to all the little amenities of social 
life ? Thus their eager questions remain 
unanswered, the warm tide of their love 
is turned back, their tender sympathies 
are withered, and their intellects dwarf- 
ed ; just as vines are kept from strug- 
gling upward by weights laid upon them, 
and at length, by long continued pres- 
sure, run along the ground and climb no 
higher. 

When books are opened and the gen- 
eral routine of lessons entered upon, 
there is still greater need for the young 
student to give voice to the thoughts 
within him. In this way he will gradu- 
ally acquire fluency of speech, with an 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



CONVERSATION. 

easy grace of maimer that can never be 
won if the opportunity is now lost. Ex- 
ercise rounds the muscles of the arm, 
and gives it beauty as well as strength. 
If we would have our children reap the 
highest advantage from study, we must 
accustom them to talk freely of what 
they study. In this manner memory 
will strengthen, judgment improve, taste 
become refined, and Intellect be stimu- 
lated ; while the organs of speech will 
become facile, easily ringing out the 
thoughts with proper inflections, and 
changes of expression. The voice should 
be like an instrument of music, sweet, 
mellow, winning, in itself a power of in- 
estimable value to the possessor. 

A family linked by such ties is like a 
paradise, a garden of delight: the pa- 
rents, with knowledge and experience, 
leading and guiding; the children obe- 
dient, graceful, loving, opening their 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



nearts to the parents just as the buds 
develop under the genial rays of the 
sun. 

This habit of social converse does not 
of necessity imply the highest order of 
intellect. Great intelligences scarcely 
fail to shout over common minds. We 
do not, as a general rule, choose friends 
on account of brilliant conversational 
powers; these are inestimable in an ac- 
quaintance, but might prove a drawback 
in a nearer relationship. Still, so much 
of conversational power we need to link 
and bind family ties in sweet, intelligent, 
daily intercourse. A simple English bal- 
lad, vrell sung, touches the heart with 
deeper emotions than the splendid arias 
and bravuras that inspire only wonder, 
or have a certain nameless fascination 
that holds the listener spell-bound, but 
fail to give birth to higher, nobler, purer 
feelings. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



CONVERSATION. 197 

The charm of conversation is in a 
genial assimilation to those with whom 
we converse, an adaptation to their man- 
ner of thought, a way of seeming to pos- 
sess only so much mind as the person 
we converse with, talking like an equal. 
This power is not entirely a natural gift ; 
it is and may be cultivated by giving 
attention, seizing just those points of a 
subject with which others feel most at 
home, slipping into other people's way 
of thought, and investing their ideas in 
a dress agreeable to them. Such per- 
sons can afford to be modest, and are 
sure to win attention, because they know 
how to adapt themselves to the minds 
of others. It is this power that renders 
one charming, fascinating, irresistible — 
a talent well worth cultivating by both 
sexes, but especially by woman. 

Another advantage is the real value 
of this talent to its possessor ; the influ- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



eiice over others acquired through this 
channel — their insight and experience 
winning all with whom they have to do 
to unfold their most secret treasures of 
thought, and thus assisting them to build 
their mental structure higher and still 
higher. 

The intercourse of mind is a mystery. 
Such free and graceful conversational 
power may not bo ours, it may not be- 
long to our children ; but let us remem- 
ber that it is in part a cultivated growth. 
If we do not attain it to perfection, we 
can attempt it, beginning with our chil- 
dren when young, training their just 
budding ideas. Time will prove our 
work. Effort well directed is never lost. 



cjiGooglc 





Hospitality. 

^HOSPITALITY is not only a 
cardinal virtue, but it is a 
'. strong social bond, uniting fam- 
ilies, neighborhoods, and com- 
munities, cementing and making 
firm the integral parts of the great social 
system. Man is constituted a social 
being, sympathy is needful to him as the 
air he breathes. It is like the sun, dis- 
pensing warmth ; by it he is stimulated 
to exertion and nerved for danger ; his 
energies are sustained, his sensibilities 
made tender, and his intellect acute and 
far-seeing. Isolate him, set him apart 



cjiGooglc 



from his kind, and he becomes a 
being ; the vital forces of his nature ebb 
and 'flow with a dull, pouderous stroke. 
The waves of feeling sweep over the 
cold gray sands of a cheerless existence ; 
the intellect is dwarfed, the inner sanc- 
tuary of the heart dismantled, and the 
fire on its altar becomes cold and dead. 
It is by reason of man's social nature 
that God "set the solitary in families." 
Knowing what was in the heart of man, 
he has made provision for our mental as 
well as for our spiritual needs. He 
chaises his followers to be lovers of hos- 
pitality, entertaining strangers, as there- 
by some have "entertained angels una- 
wares." It is one of the fundamental 
principles of the Christian religion, that 
it does away with caste, and brealts 
down social barriers. Each and all of 
the great human family stand before 
Hira as miserable offenders. Of what 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOSPITALITY. 201 

importance in the sight of God are the 
petty differences of condition between 
Dives and Lazarus, queens and serving 
■women, pampered ladies and unsightly 
beggars ? It was not the ivory and gold, 
the hangings of purple and fine linen, the 
pomegranates and the precious stones ; 
it was not the altar, but the sacrifice 
laid upon the altar, the spirit in which 
it was made, the purity of motive, the 
humble, contrite heart, that were pre- 
cious in the sight of God. 

By hospitality the apostle did not 
mean to enjoin simply the entertaining 
of personal friends; neither did he limit 
it to distribution to the saints. "Blessed 
be God, even the Father of mercies and 
the God of all comfort, who comforteth 
us in all our tribulation, that we may be 
able to comfort them which are in any 
trouble, by the comfort wherewith we 
ourselves are comforted of God." This 



cjiGooglc 



is the secret of hospitality, that we may 
comfort others. 

If hospitality is a virtue that we would 
see oar children possessed of, we must 
cultivate it at home — opening our doors 
especially to those who stand in need of 
comfort or consolation, that we may com- 
fort them according to the measure that 
we have received. Hearts are strangely 
alike, little kindnesses find the quickest 
avenues ; the look of sympathy, the fi.rm 
hand-clasp, the tender, genial word, these 
cost nothing, why do we withhold them ? 
Children learn of us ; they do as we do. 
If we neglect the poor, shutting the door 
upon them because they are abject and 
uncomely, so will they. If we look cold- 
ly upon the stranger, passing him by 
because he is a stranger, so will they. 
Poor and perhaps sinful he may.be, yet 
why may we not open our doors to him, 
give him the shelter of a roof, talk with 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



H0SPITA.L1TT. 203 

him, pray with him, tel! him of Jesus? 
He is a stranger ; yet why may we not 
take him by the hand ? Though a stran- 
ger to us, he may not be a stranger to 
God ; and if a stranger and an alien, yet 
the dear heavenly Father is still waiting 
to receive bim. Is this not a fitting op- 
portunity to whisper ia his ear the name 
of Jesus? Do we " covet earnestly the 
best gifts" for our childreu? we must 
not' fail to let them see how good and 
sweet a thing it is to be kindly consid- 
erate one of another, ready with the 
right word in the right place, letting our 
light so shine that the beauty of holiness 
will be revealed, and the world be at- 
tracted and won by it. 

In cultivating a spirit of hospitality, 
as in the distribution of our goods, the 
blessing that follows more than repays 
us for the self-denial practised. The 
sensible presence of the Master is given 



cjiGooglc 



to us, and the comforting words, " Who- 
soever shall give to drink unto one of 
these little ones, a cup of cold water in 
my name, shall in no wise lose bis re- 
ward." Subject as we are to change, the 
rolling years sweeping away friends like 
leaves before the antumn winds, and the 
home comfort gathered in a lifetime swal- 
lowed by fire or shipwreck, what secu- 
rity have we that some adverse gale 
will not strip us of the accidentals that 
go to make so large a part of every life ? 
In view of these changes, it is fitting 
that we keep open doors, ready to share 
with those who have less. If no more 
than a cup of cold water, do not deny 
the children the privilege of bearing it 
in their own hands ; do not deprive them 
of the blessedness of doing it for Christ's 
sake. Comforting others will only prove 
another means of making home happy. 
Conversant with the sorrow, pain, and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOSPITALITY. 205 

suffering of others, our children will be 
more sympathetic, more efficient in all 
the emergencies of life. Some of the 
warmest friendships this world has ever 
known had their origin in a word spoken 
to a stranger. 

Children are attracted to each other 
without stopping to adjust the social bal- 
ance. On several occasions going and 
coming from school, Margaret had been 
helped out of serious difficulty by Jeph- 
thah Hull, a roving, capricious lad, whose 
reputation was in no wise enviable in 
the community. Margaret's sympathy 
was aroused. Jephthah, or Jeph as he 
was called, had not a wicked look. His 
figure was tall, straight, and mascular ; 
his eyes of a changeable gray hue — at 
times tender, pleading, almost reproach- 
ful ; then bright, resolute, fearless ; his 
hair was thick and curling, and the 
proud curve of his lips denoted a char- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



acter that needed careful devdopment. 
With no home, Jeph lived by doing odd 
jobs at anything he could find, and from 
being rash and impetuous he wou for 
himself the reputation of being the in- 
stigator, if not the actual agent, of all 
the mischief practised in the neighbor- 
hood. 

One night as I was listening to Maude, 
I heard Margaret talking with her father 
about Jeph and his manner of life. "Wild 
and boisterous as the boy is," she said, 
"his voice is mild and his manners re- 
spectful." 

"But he is the terror of the commu- 
nity," said her father. 

"Only think, papa; Jeph never had a 
home ; he does not even remember that 
he had a mother. In his babyhood he 
was thrust out to live as he could ; flung 
round from one place to another, he has 
never had any teaching. He has never 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOSPITALITY. 207 

been to school, and still he can read and 
write correctly," 

The child'sheart was effectually roused 
I saw it, and I knew that her father 
would not refuse her. 

"And if I take him as you wish, what 
then ?" 

"I will teach him, papa, until he has 
learned the little that I know, and by 
that time something else will open for 
him." 

"Wo will try," answered her father. 
And thus Jeph came to our house. His 
duties were light, to sweep the office, 
light the fires, and keep the grounds in 
order. Small duties, but requiring faith- 
fulness. At first he would forget, play 
truant, and was not disposed to bear the 
least rebuke. Margaret was quick to 
understand the boy, and she never tired 
of his caprices ; she taught him from 
books, and mingled with her instruc- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



208 WOMAN. 

tion words that touched upon his daily 
habits. Ere long the boy's confidence 
was won ; his better nature was awa- 
kened ; he saw great possibilities even 
for him; life wore a new aspect; his 
mind opened to kindly influences, he be- 
gan to show uncommon brilliancy. As 
Margaret had said, when she had taught 
him the little that she knew, a way 
opened for him to go forward. This 
same friendless boy is now a world- 
renowued author, an earnest, active, 
Christian man. 

This is not an isolated case ; there are 
many, like Margaret, ready to take the 
little outcasts by the hand. But not all 
are thus ready. As we look upon the 
myriad waifs floating around us, we shall 
not soil our hands if we, having empty 
rooms, give warmth and shelter to little 
ones for whom Christ died; little ones 
to be taught to live and work for Him. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HOSPITALITY. 209 

Poor and destitute, Jesus fakes them in 
ilia arms. So let us teach our children 
to love them with a tender, abiding love ; 
not to be led hy them Into evil, but to 
be ourselves their leaders — up to the 
good Physician. Blessed privilege ! to 
comfort as we ourselves are comforted — 
giving according to the measure that we 
have received, biest in ourselves and in 
our children by so doing. 

Genial hospitality betrays itself in the 
easy grace of a casual meeting — the tones 
of the voice showing interest, the eye 
filled with a tender light, the manner 
showing a certain heartiness that exalts 
the receiver into an equal. Doubtless 
all know homes of this description, where 
there is an easy welcoming of guests, 
the parents being assisted by their chil- 
dren ; and the aim of all is to interest 
their guest without the appearance of 
effort. A rare blessing to the young it 

won,.. 14 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



is, to be privileged with the acquaint- 
tance of such a Christian family; for 
none but a Christian family could thus 
carry out the spirit of the gospel, gladly 
taking the wanderer by the hand, and 
saying, "Come thou with us, for we will 
do thee good.'' 

"What a resting-place for the aged is 
a household in which these tender home 
influences come to them as portraits of 
the home-gathering above, its rest, con- 
tent, and enjoyment. Such precious re- 
unions strengthen the bond of Christian 
brotherhood ; their golden glow warms 
the heart of the impenitent, causing them 
to esclalm, Behold, how beautiful the 
fellowship of Christian hearts ! The 
memory of little kindnesses clings to 
them, and at length brings them to 
Jesus. As Christian mothers, is not 
this the work given us to do? Should 
we not be ready at all times to minister 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HOSPITALITY. 211 

unto any we can benefit, imparting as 
freely as we receive? our highest enjoy- 
ment to be found in serving Christ, our 
highest praise, "She hath done what 
she could." 




cjiGoogic 





i EOM the "beginning the cos- 
tume of nations has been in keep- 
ing with their attainments in civ- 
ilization, architecture, and the 
fine arts. In the nomadic life, wander- 
ing tribes, dwelling in tents, were satis- 
fied with coats of skins, sandals, and 
loose mantles, leaving the body free to 
act with its all its strength and supple- 
ness. The dress of that early day did 
not require numberless changes to de- 
note the wealth of the possessor ; flocks 
and herds were the chief criterion, and 
if many " changes of raiment " were de- 



cjiGooglc 



manded, they were in good part intend- 
ed for presents, or as tokens of favor 
offered to guests. 

As walled towns began to appear, 
more protection was sought in dress. 
Armor was brought into use, and a 
greater variety of garments; still, the 
make was exceedingly simple, and the 
limbs were unimpeded and free in their 
movements. Down through the centuries 
we find beauty habited in loose, flowing 
garments, falling lightly about the iigure, 
with a profusion of ornaments^gold, sil- 
ver, ivory, and precious stones. Anklets 
with small silver bells made music as the 
maidens danced, and their round arms 
bare to the shoulder, were bound with 
bracelets, in keeping with their wealth. 
Jewels were extensively worn by the 
nations in the apostles' time. Hence the 
injunction, " Whose adorning, let it not 
be that outward adorning of plaiting the 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



214 WOMAN. 

hair and of wearmg of gold, or of put- 
ting on of apparel ; but let it be the hid- 
den man of the heart, in that which is 
not corruptible, even the ornament of a 

meek and quiet spirit For after 

this manner in the old time the holy 
women adorned themselves." " Not 
with broidered hair, or gold, or pearls, 
or costly array; but, which becometh 
women professing godliness, with good 
works." 

The apostle has reference here to the 
customs of the heathen women. While 
from his general teaching we cannot ac- 
cuse him of wishing to do away with a 
becoming style of dress, wc see plainly 
that he desired to make dress second- 
ary: "a meek and quiet spirit," with 
"good works" being more desirable than 
costly array and precious stones. Paul 
and Peter would have women profess- 
ing godliness make it known by outward 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



expression, as well as by "chaste con- 
versation, coupled with fear." 

It is sufficient for our purpose to note 
the dividing line between the Christian 
woman and, the woman of the world. 
Passing down the successive ages from 
the apostle's time to our own, is the 
echo of the same voice, "not with broid- 
ered hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly 
array; but, which becometh women pro- 
fessing godliness, with good works." In 
the history of the Christian church there 
was never a time perhaps when there 
was greater necessity for each individ- 
ual member to walk humbly and circum- 
spectly before God. The tires of strange 
philosophies and false creeds are seen 
on every hill ; infidelity thrusts its slimy 
head and sinuous glittering folds into 
our colleges and institutions of learning ; 
and the popular mind, floating out on 
the sea of speculation, dares, with impi- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



216 WOMAN. 

0U3 hand, thrust back the gates, and with 
curious, prying eyes, seeks to gain knowl- 
edge of the Invisible and unrevealcd. 

Living in an age eminently progres- 
sive, the elements brought, into subjec- 
tion, the caverns of the great deep but 
whispering galleries, thought flashing in 
a moment round the world, the secrets 
of the earth laid open to the eye of man, 
is there not danger that in our pride we 
may drift away from the old landmarks, 
and from the safe anchorage, and be 
tossed about by vain imaginings and 
shallow ideas of new and strange sys- 
tems yet to come to light and die. With 
the spirit of speculation abroad in the 
land, is there not danger, lest in seeking 
"the unknown good," we neglect the 
plain command, discarded because so 
plain, so easily understood ? 

Looking into the mirror of God's word 
we find that the way is straight and 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



narrow, and that the commands given 
to mankind were given for all time. 
Consequently, a broad and unbridled 
license in thought and in deed is not 
becoming in those who profess to be 
guided by the word of God. 

In every age dress has not only had 
much to do in the petty distinctions of 
caste, and in marking the different grades 
of society, but it has been considered 
one of the signs of the times, an expo- 
nent or mirror, reflecting the onward 
movement of the age. ■ For those who 
profess godliness, moderation is enjoined. 
They must be "temperate in all things," 
in eating, and drinking, and dress; with 
nothing absurd or ascetic, but studying 
simplicity, neatness, and order — a cos- 
tume that befits a temple on which puri- 
ty and beauty are plainly inscribed. The 
apostle himself was not beyond thinking 
of these things. In his letter to Timo- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



218 WOMAK. 

thy, asking for the cloak that he left at 
Troas, we see that he must have been 
moved by the same wants and needs 
that hare such influence oyer us. Such 
knowledge of the apostle's life and man- 
ner brings him nearer to us ; our sym- 
pathies are with him, and we are not so 
much inclined to. consider him as severe 
in his restrictions. Paul did not despise 
the things of this life ; neither does he 
desire that we should. He only asks' 
that we "use them as not abusing;" 
making them secondary and subservient, 
and thinking more of comfort and con- 
venience than of display. 

There is a peculiar charm in adapta- 
tion. If we live conscientiously, not 
lightly esteeming the things of this life, 
but still thinking more of another, into 
which we are liable to enter at any mo- 
ment, surely we shall not be inclined to 
spend our strength on this that perishes 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



with the using, absorbing time that is of 
inestimable value. If eternity is in real- 
ity the chief concern, we shall not wish 
to encumber _onrselves or our children 
with needless care and anxiety. The 
traveller chooses his dress according to 
the season ; it is adapted to his necessi- 
ties, it is soiled and travel-stained per- 
haps. What difference? He will put on 
fresh apparel when he reaches his jour- 
ney's end. He does not thinly of the 
way, in the anticipation of what is be- 
fore him. Life is a journey ; let our 
travelling dress be appropriate, plain, 
simple, unostentatious, but let our best 
robe be the white robe of our heavenly 
home. 

In the natural world, where there are 
hidden and special gifts, outward show 
is often lacking. Singing birds wear the 
plainest plumage, and the sweetest flow- 
ers arc the small, unpretending ones. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



220 WOMAN. 

If fitness is needful in the selection ot 
garments, fitness is likewise reqnisite in 
the wearing. A style of dress pretty 
and becoming at home, maj not be suit- 
able for church. A pretty and becom- 
ing dress for a breakfast or a dinner 
party, is not always the one in which 
we should enter the street cars, or make 
a long journey. Neither are we to habit 
ourselves in evening costume when we 
visit the sick, or call on the poor and 
the necessitous. As Christians, we should 
show a due regard to fitness in this re- 
spect, selecting for ourselves and for our 
children according to time and place, 
with a wise adaptation in all that we do. 

Returning from school on one occa- 
sion, Maude came rushing into my room, 
the blue eyes earnest and pleading, the 
face bright and arch, as the child danced 
up before me with a card of invitation 
In her hand. "Mamma, Lucy Fan wants 

iiM:c3,Googlc 



DBESS. 221 

me to come to her party, Thursday. Can 
I go, please ?" 

Mr. and Mrs. Fan were members of a 
sister church. I knew them slightly, 
and knew that the children were pleas- 
ant and agreeable in manner. I saw 
nothing against it, and willing to give 
the child pleasure, gave my assent. It 
was our habit to dress prettily and neat- 
ly at home, and when we went out we 
aimed at nothing more. On this occa- 
sion, I made for Maude a simple dress 
of white sffiss, with a blue sash for the 
waist. It was a trifle prettier than usual, 
and when the day came and Maude was 
dressed, her soft brown hair falling in 
ringlets over her plump shoulders, her 
eyes sparkling and her cheeks rosy with 
health, I must confess to a little pride 
and an extra kiss. Papa kissed the 
chUd: "I hope my little girl will enjoy 
herself very much." Then turning, he 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



222 WOMAN. 

once more kissed the ruddy cheek, and 
said, "May the heart of iny little girl 
be as pure as her dress." 

Jem was proud of his sister. I saw 
it as he walked down the street, and T 
fear my own heart was full of pride. 
Maude looked so sweet and good, and I 
was sure that all would appreciate the 
innocent beauty of my child. 

At night her father brought her home ; 
and as I caught a glimpse of the white 
face, I saw that Maude was sadly tried. 

" What is it, pet?" said I, as I folded 
her in my arms. 

"0 mamma!" and the tears were 
streaming down her cheeks. I saw the 
child was grieved, and did not urge her. 
It was a long time before she could tell 
me, and then only in broken snatches, 
that it was the simplicity of her dress, 
Lucy's friends taking exception to one 
so plainly c 



cjiGooglc 



" Why, wbat was your mother think- 
ing of? Did she know it was to be a 
dress party ?" cried one. 

"I never wear' anything but white," 
stammered Maude. 

' ' A regular little nun. But why did 
YOU not have ruffles, or flounces of Val- 
enciennes ?" 

" Mamma thinks plain dresses are the 
prettiest." 

"Why, where has she lived? No- 
body thinks of wearing a plain dress ; it 
makes you look like a little Methodist." 

"I was afraid it would be so," and 
Margaret crept up to Maude and tried 
to comfort her. 

"What led you to think so?" I asked. 

"At Miss Bernard's, where Lucy goes 
to school, there is a great display of 
dress. Sarah Erskine says the girls are 
in party costume all the time." 

There is a fascination in gay dress, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



224 WOMAN. 

an invisible influence, wrapping one in 
folds too strong to be broken by weak 
hands. Fortune is a fickle goddess ; her 
favors are seldom dispensed to tlie same 
family for two centuries ; and if it were 
otherwise, and if one can afi'ord to dress 
richly, is the school-room a place to ex- 
hibit finery? Here the daughters of the 
poor and the rich meet for the purpose 
of mental improvement, preparing for 
the duties and responsibilities of social 
life ; study is the duty of each, and pro- 
motion should depend upon merit alone. 
A great blemish it must be for pupils in 
the same class, sitting on the same seats, 
occupying the same rooms, to show a 
marked disparity in dress and appear- 
ance. Pride is inherent, and the love 
of dress natural to woman. Much of 
the sin in after years, the murmuring 
and repining, has had its origin in the 
undue display of dress in the school- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



room. The daughter of the rich man 
priding herself on the magnificence of 
her wardrobe; the daughter of the poor 
man, a heavy tax to her parents, and 
then dissatisfied, forgetful of her oppor- 
tunities, thinking only of display, and at 
length resorting to unhallowed means to 
gratify her passion for dress. 

The time to instil right principles is 
in childhood. Knowing the heart of our 
daughters, cannot we teach them that 
the mind is more than the body, the 
heart more than the mind? Cannot we 
teach them that youth is never so attrac- 
tive as when dressed simply? Cannot 
we make it plain to them that beauty is 
enhanced by it, just as the diamond 
shows to the greatest advantage when 
set simply? Cannot we teach them the 
beauty of adaptation, enjoining upon 
them the necessity of a proper influence, 
that a modest dress is becoming in pub- 

W.nn^. 15 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



lie assemblies, and that greater care is 
needful in color, make, and finish, for 
wear in a promiscuous throng. Cannot 
we show them that display is to be 
avoided in church? that simplicity, good 
taste, and neatness are indispensable for 
God's house? As worshippers, we go 
up to his courts; as suppliants, we lay 
our offering upon the altar, conscious 
that the eye of the Most High looketh 
at the heart, and not on the outward 
adorning. 

In church, as in school, tlie rich and 
the poor meet together. Have we the 
right to dress so that a weak brother or 
sister shall be offended? The eye is 
pained and the heart is distressed by 
little things. 

An indiscriminate display of jewelry 
is quite offensive to good taste. True, 
there are those who think it incumbent 
upon them to wear all that they have 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



DEESS. 227 

upon every occasion. At'breakfast, we 
see them with fingers loaded with rings, 
pendants in their ears, ornamental combs, 
with hair perhaps in curl jiapers. A 
pretty chintz wrapper, with hair neatly 
arranged, and without jewels, would form 
a charming contrast to such an appear- 
ance. 

InappFopriateuess of dress belongs 
more especially to us as a people than 
to any other nation. The English wom- 
an, in travelling, provides herself with 
coarse, strong garments, and discards 
jewelry. The advantages of fine dress 
are reserved for the drawing-room. The 
good Victoria goes to Scotland to enjoy 
herself. Her costume is plain and sim- 
ple, and in the small church at Balmoral 
there is nothing of display to attract the 
eye, or to distract the heart of the hum- 
blest worshipper. 

A little sober thought upon this ques- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



228 WOMAN. 

tioii will be enough to convince the most 
Inconsistent. A more careful style of 
dress at home, with less expense and 
less display abroad, would tend more to 
the happiness of families, than volumes 
of theories, discussion, and even legisla- 
tion. Love has need to be very strong 
indeed, that can stand tamely and con- 
trast the negligent appearance of the 
morning dress with the elaborate style 
and elegant decorations put on to please 
the eyes of strangers. A fresh, charm- 
ing costume goes far towards making a 
happy home. As well might we expect 
a bird to sing, with her plumage covered 
with mud, as a woman to be cheerful and 
amiable in a soiled, neglected costume. 

Another peculiarity, and one which 
we would in no wise overlook, is the 
disparity of dress between mother and 
daughter: the jewels and beautiful gar- 
ments worn by the latter, the self-denial 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



and economy practised by the former. 
The reverse would seem more in keep- 
ing; the ravages of time render neces- 
sary some advantage of dress ; the come- 
liness of youth is sufficient without the 
aid of rich materials and costly orna- 
ments. 

A few weeks since, I attended com- 
mencement exercises at a girls' school. 
The class of graduates was large ; they 
were fine, healthy-looking girls, all hab- 
ited in white of different materials and 
fashions. One of them wore a white 
moire, with an exceedingly short skirt, 
"so that she might look more youthful." 
Her mother was sitting near her in a 
plain dress, without ornament of any 
kind. I could uot but think how still 
more youthful and lovely the daughter 
would have looked in a simple white 
Swiss, falling gracefully about her, leav- 
ing the rich, stiff moirS for her mother. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



In cultivating the minds of our daugh- 
ters we are surely not to leave to the 
last a subject on which so much depends. 
If we instil into their minds while children 
the proper regard for dress, we may hope 
that in youth they will not be inclined 
to run into excesses, but will study what 
is becoming, and wear it in no spirit of 
ostentation, but to render home more 
attractive. God has dressed the flowers 
in beauty, and he has no desire that we 
should be unmindful of ourselves. 

" Know ye not that ye are the temple 
of God?" A temple is built expressly 
with an end in view — the indwelling of 
God ; the architecture is appropriate, 
the beams are laid in strength, and the 
altar and the hangings in keeping with 
the idea of worship. Thus with the tem- 
ple of the Holy Spirit, set apart and 
kept with the same end in view ; the 
heart an altar on which sacrifice is laid, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



DKESS. 231 

the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit 
woven in the hangings of the sanctuary ; 
the whole adapted to inspire good and 
pure thoughts, and lead the careless and 
indifferent to see and acknowledge ' the 
blessedness of those who love and honor 
God. 




cjiGooglc 




XIV. 




Amusements. 

'S our daughters grew older, 
there were decisions to make, 
' entGrtainraents to enjoy, and 
assemblies to shun ; rendering 
it necessary for us to ask still 
oftener for direction and guidance, lest 
we should fail to do according to His 
will. Jem likewise had his associates ; 
and as Gertrude was still warmly at- 
tached to Margaret, it is possible that 
we had more visitors by reason of jux- 
taposition to the large house over the 
way. It was the last year with Mar- 
garet at school, and try as I would, I 



cjiGooglc 



AMUSEMENTS. 233 

could not keep the shadow from my 
heart. I knew these small gatherings 
were but a foretaste of what there was 
in store. Society had claims and would 
be sure to assert them. My child was 
slipping from me. Not that her love 
was less, or her confidences diminished ; 
but the sweet placid beauty of her face 
was attractive, her manner cordial, and 
her words so gentle that the poorest and 
most timid of her acquaintances were not 
repelled. 

As I before said, music was cultivated 
by us, not as an accomplishment, but as 
a necessity. It entered into our being, 
was a part of our life ; our daily worship 
was not complete without it. From her 
infancy Margaret had shown a rare tal- 
ent for it, her voice was flexible and 
sweet, and she had a peculiar power of 
expression. It was the effect of culture, 
bringing out the native capacity, and so 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



perfectly that there was seemingly noth- 
ing of art about it ; the song being only 
the avenue to convey the sentiment, the 
thought floating out on the wings of mel- 
ody filling the ear with delight. 

She might have played as well per- 
haps, but loving books, she did not think 
best to take the time, neither did we 
encourage her learning more of music 
than was needful to make home happy, 
and enable her to sing in the sanctuary 
and in the prayer-meeting, leaving bril- 
liant execution and a finished touch to 
amateurs and professors. 

Many families consider music in the 
same category as dancing, or believe 
that the cultivation of one, leads to the 
cultivation and love of the other. Never 
was a greater mistake. True, dancing is 
usually accompanied by music, the steps 
in keeping with the musical mcasiire, 
but it is a music that invites to physi- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS, 235 

cal action without touching the loftier 
emotioQS of the soul. As a physical 
exercise dancing may have its advan- 
tages, but is it in itself calculated to 
advance the intellectual or the spiritual 
well-being of our children? Will our 
sons be better fitted to take their places 
in the arena of life ? Will their integrity 
be the brighter for their being adepts in 
the ball-room ? ■ Will our daughters be 
more attractive in the home circle? Will 
their qualities of heart and mind mature 
more thoroughly in such an atmosphere ? 
Will the friends they make, the acquaint- 
ances they form in the quadrille and the 
waltz prove desirable as lifelong com- 
panions ? If not, can we trust them 
there? 

" But a public dance is altogether dif- 
ferent from a quiet cotillon in the par- 
lor." True, there is not the crowd. But 
what is the difference between taking a 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



1 of brandy at one's sideboard, or 
■ it in the saloon? the brandy is 
the same, the poison acts in the same 
manner ; it does not change the nature 
of the beverage, or lessen the evil, that 
it is private. 

Dancing is in itself fascinating, the 
meeting of the sexes in the dance thrills 
the frame with the same impulse in the 
parlor as in the public assembly. If one 
is wrong, surely the other cannot be 
defended, for both are the same, save in 
extent. Poison taken into the system in 
a large dose, produces instant death ; a 
small quantity works more slowly, but 
leads to the same result. That there are 
Christian parents who view this differ- 
ently I am aware ; parents who dress 
their daughters for the social dance, 
while they themselves go to the prayer- 
meeting. I have known such, we have 
all known them perhaps. But I do not 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



AMUSEMENTS. 237 

know parents of this kind whose hearts 
are cheered by seeing their children 
brought to Christ; the arrangement is 
not one that favors early piety. We 
should not expect to see a Timothy, a 
Samuel, a Daniel, or a Mary in such a 
house. "As for me and my house, we 
will serve the Lord," would seem the 
natural motto of parents who profess to 
put their confidence in Grod. If we love 
an object it is our tirst thought how we 
may please the object of our love. The 
impenitent do not love God ; hence they 
do not desire to please him ; the thought 
of God is not in their hearts. The be- 
liever professes to love him, but love is 
shown by obedience. If we love him, 
we shall keep his commandments. Is 
there a line in the Bible that goes to 
prove that the giddy whirl of the waltz 
is not at all objectionable if indulged in 
quietly, and still is averse to purity and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



good morals if indulged in for a longer 
period, or in a public assembly ? 

"And whatsoever ye do in word or 
deed, do all in the name of the Lord 
Jesus." "Abstain from all appearance 
of evil." If these requirements have 
any weight, can the inmates of a godly 
household give themselves to an amuse- 
ment upon which, from its very nature, 
they could not ask the blessing of God ? 

But I hear it said, "There is no stand- 
ard with reference to this ; we are each 
at liberty to follow the dictates of our 
own conscience; and as for our children, 
if they think it is wrong when they are 
older, it will be for them to abstain 
from it." But our children were given 
us to bring up ,for God. If their lives 
prove a failure, will he not require a 
reason? If our children are finally lost, 
shall we not be in a measure- responsi- 
ble ? Children were not given to lead the 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS. 239 

parents ; but to be led, guided, taught 
by the parents. A fearful charge. Can 
we afford to run the risk of letting them 
dance and waltz into eternity ? Can we 
stand idly by, saying to each other, 
"When they are older, they will do 
different, youth is the time for enjoy- 
ment, we will not mar their pleasure, 
neither will we thwart their inclina- 
tions ?" Have we any surety of their 
lives? Because we have them to-day, 
have we any pledge that they will be 
ours to-morrow ? They are slipping 
away from us; now is the time to lay 
foundations, to instil right principles ; 
the opportunity once lost can never be 
regained. If wo wish to see our sons 
walking in the path of truth: if we de- 
sire to see our daughters as "corner- 
stones polished after the similitude of a 
palace," we must watch over them close- 
ly ; seeking their happiness in all health- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



ia\ ways, and abstaining eoDScientiously 
from those diversions, which, however 
harmless they may seem, add nothing to 
intellectual culture and true spiritual 
growth, and are ruled simply by the 
god of this world. 

Nest to dancing, private theatricals 
are defended by many parents. But 
why private ! If the stage is to be com- 
mended, why not go publicly? "The 
theatre is not just the place for children," 
says one; "there are so many other 
things included, that it is now almost 
impossible to see a good play." And 
why is this ? Simply that the class who 
frequent the theatre desire something 
more tlian the representation of the play. 
The managers of the theatre say freely 
that they could not keep it up if not for 
the objectionable features of the drama. 
The very best plays of Shakespeare, set 
off with the best acting, and heightened 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS. 241 

by esquisite scenery, to use the ordinary 
phraseology, do not "pay." No wonder 
that the theatre is not just the place for 
children. The only wonder is that any 
parent should think of it for a moment 
in connection with his children. 

True, private theatricals might be free 
from some of these objections. But to 
what profit? An intelligent reading of 
Shakespeare would give one as good an 
idea of character. I recollect listening 
to one of our best tragedians as he 
read Macbeth ; quite as instructive, he 
allowed, as it would have been on the 
boards : a little imagination could easily 
construct a scaffolding, with scenery and 
all the et ceteras of stage eshibition ; 
and with this exception, the rendering 
was the same. 

The minds of the young are like some 
deftly strung instrument, the softest 
touch makes an impression, and the song 

w«=«,. 16 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



2i2 -WOMAN. 

evoked adds to the beauty or to the 
deformity of the finished work. A mere- 
ly sensuous delight, a picture, or a wave 
of melody may please the eye or charm 
the ear with its sweetness, and still fait 
to touch the heart. If the mind is more 
than the body, and the heart more than 
the mind, then time that is spent for 
other than the highest good must be time 
misspent. Life is not to be frittered 
away without profit. Eternity is too 
near and too enduring to be unthought 
of and unprovided for. 

As in childhood we are careful to 
provide for the health and well-being of 
our children, permitting them to enjoy 
all healthy exercise, and plays well lit- 
ted to give tone to their muscles and 
strength to their constitution, so in youth 
we should make an effort to secure such 
amusements as will cause the full devel- 
opment of their mental faculties and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



AJIDSEMEHTS. 243 

conduce to their greatest vigor througti 
life. 

To converse well requires study and 
practice. Home can hardly be called 
happy without the intelligent exercise 
of the organs of speech; commonplace 
platitudes pall on the ear, and with 
nothing to interest them at home, the 
inmates of our dwellings will seek places 
that promise them more in this respect. 
To read well is an accomplishment of 
immense value in the home circle. What 
can be a more beautiful picture than the 
eveniog gatherings in a well-appointed 
home : the old and the young, with sew- 
ing, books, and music, seasoned with the 
wisdom of age, the gay sparkle of youth, 
and the prattle of little children. The 
atmosphere of such a home is favorable 
to the purity of body and soul. Happi- 
ness is a plant of daily growth, and cul- 
. ture is built up of opportunities. Out- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



244 WOMAN. 

ward circumstaaces have little to do 
with inward content ; the life we lead is 
the effect of the atmosphere we breathe 
in our homes. 

Musical soirees have an effect highly 
desirable. Some of the finest minds the 
world has ever known have been in the 
habit of meeting one evening in every 
week for the purpose of mental improve- 
ment and enjoyment, giving full scope 
to their powers of speech, with criticisms 
and discussions on scientific subjects and 
the questions of the day- — repartee and 
brilliant bon-mots stimulating and en- 
gaging and strengthening the faculties. 
Lectures and debates, chemical experi- 
ments and scientific disquisitions give a 
pleasing variety and intelligent enter- 
tainment to the mind. 

Looking at life as a sphere of duty, 
we cannot consider a mere idle diversion 
which has no higher aim than to kill 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS. 245 

time, as entering into the life-plan. Yet 
effort of every kind needs intervals of 
relaxation — some agreeable change re- 
laxing thought, and giving the jaded 
powers of mind and body time to regain 
elasticity and vigor. The yonng espe- 
cially need this. But what mother will 
be satisfied to give her children husks, 
when it is in her power to provide them 
wholesome food ? Thus with amusement. 
What mother will be willing to let her 
daughter spend the time unwisely, when 
it is in her power to provide more suit- 
able entertainment? 

There is too' prevalent in our day a 
certain clanship, a division and sub- 
division of society, people associating 
together exclusiyely according to age 
and social fellowship; but there cannot 
be a greater mistake as far as improve- 
ment is concerned, and there must be a 
serious loss of the enjoyment arising from 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



246 WOMAN. 

the pleasing interchange of thought and 
feeling. Beauty and homeliness, youth 
and age, the learned and the ignorant, 
make up God's world. Variety is need- 
ful. We do not see the gardener filling 
all his beds with the same flowers ; beau- 
tiful as they may be, the monotony would 
cease to give pleasure ; delicious as their 
perfume might be, we should sigh for 
some variety of fragrance. In our social 
gatherings why should we confine our- 
selves to the range of a certain moneyed 
rank, or of a certain intellectual calibre? 
Social meetings are for relaxation, for en- 
tertainment ; study is laid aside, thought 
unbends itself, the man of science looks 
for diversion ; the lady of brilliant con- 
versational pow.ers finds a listener in 
some silent but appreciative friend. It 
is not wise to be too exclusive, neither 
is it wise to bring up our children to 
feel that there is no enjoyment outside 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS. 2i7 

a prescribed circle of age or of position. 
A long list of acquaintances adds to our 
personal happiness, helps to deepen the 
channel of our ideas, and to enlarge the 
scope of our benevolent feelings. Broad 
views of men and things can only be 
gained in this waj^; prejudice, bigotry, 
and all uncharitableness arc thus thrust 
out, and a genial well-bred manner ac- 
quired. 

Teaching our children to be kind and 
considerate, we are also to tone down 
their eager expectancy. Every acquain- 
tance is not likely to turn into a friend. 
To be attracted by people, to meet them 
at stated intervals, to be cordial and 
friendly in no wise requires undue con- 
fidence towards all. A pleasing exte- 
rior, good manners and correct deport- 
ment constitute an agreeable acquaint- 
ance. But a friend is one to whom we 
are drawn by a certain congeniality of 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



soul, with a thrilling pleasure when we 
meet, a sympathetic, harmonious blend- 
ing of two natures, and the deep satis- 
faction of feeling that each is understood, 
appreciated, valued for choice gifts and 
close intimacies unknown to the world. 
Acquaintances are counted by scores; 
friends are few as angel visitors. It is 
a rare life that finds more that one, gen- 
uine and lasting; many go on to the 
grave with less. 

We do not aim by this to teach our 
children that it is impossible for an 
acquaintance to become a valued friend ; 
but only to save them from impatience 
and repining because the new acquaint- 
ance does not prove to be all that they 
thought to find. Until experience has 
taught a lesson, there is something intol- 
erable to youth in realizing the slight 
tenure which they have on all they see ; 
the little claim they have or are really 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS. 249 

likely lo have on society around them. 
To teach them to be contented with the 
refreshment and solace they can gain 
from good society, is to do them a last- 
ing service, and the lesson can be tai^ht 
by no one so well as by the mother. 
She also can teach them that there arc 
real and substantial qualities which ren- 
der an acquaintance charming, that would 
be insufficient in a friend ; brilliancy of 
thought, fluency of speech, vivacity and 
an easy grace of manner fascinate us in 
society; but these may be united with 
some alloy that would be fatal to the 
closer bond of friendship. A knowledge 
of this will aid both our sons and our 
daughters in the choice they malie of 
friends j and thus mistakes will be pre- 
vented that, if once made, can never be 
rectified. A pleasant acquaintance can 
be found in a day, in an hour perhaps ; 
but a friend is chosen, not for external 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



qualities, but for innate principles ot 
heart and mind, the beauty of which will 
increase, the more intimate the union. 

Another lesson that will be of essen- 
tial service to our children is to give 
them to see plainly, that society requires 
great powers of reticence and self-con- 
trol in those who mix in it. It is so 
natural for the inexperienced to commit 
themselves by over energy of expres- 
sion, by over-earnest tones, in a word, 
by exposing their hidden life at inappro- 
priate times and places ; and on becom- 
ing conscious of it they are mortified, 
and their self-respect receives a wound. 
Every person accustomed to society un- 
derstands that he must not obtrude his 
honest convictioias too forcibly. The 
light, passing superficial treatment of a 
subject does not imply that people have 
not convictions which elsewhere, in the 
privacy of home, or when duty requires, 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



AMUSEMENTS. 251 

they can express with warmth and force ; 
but experience has taught them that the 
unrestrained liberty of speech of one, 
would be to the hinderance of others. 

Thus we have touched upon several 
social questions, as having an intimate 
relation with amusements or relaxation 
in the ordinary acceptation of the word. 
For social beings, amusement would 
cease to be amusement if taken in soli- 
tude ; while in most cases the choice of 
amusement depends not a little upon the 
choice of friends. "Show me a man's 
friends, and I can tell you what kind of 
a man he is, and the places that he loves 
to frequent." 

It becomes us to choose wisely for our 
children with reference to their amuse- 
ments, as well as to their friends. It is 
not the great events of life, but rather 
the little daily acts that show character : 
the hours of recreation maV be like the 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



light breeze tliat fills our sails and sends 
us onward with a smooth gliding motion ; 
or they may become like the hot breath 
from the desert withering and destroy- 
ing all the verdure that lies in its path- 
way. 




cjiGoogic 





XV. 

Domestic Relations. 

^T is frequently said, and I 
OQce felt, that the happiest period 
in a mother's life was with her 
little ones in her arms ; the pat- 
ter of their tiny feet making 
masic all day long, their gleeful voices 
merry as robins in spring-time, and 
their eyes like unfathomed wells in 
which great and wonderful truths are to 
be mirrored. But now, as I sit with 
such a sweet restful feeling, listening to 
Margaret singing at her work, I am in- 
clined to think the happiness the mother 
feels in nursing her babes is less than 
the sweet joy that floods her heart when 



cjiGoogic 



254 WOMAN. 

those dear babes are spared to reach 
their youth. The fresh-blown flower is 
sweeter than the bud ; the bird that sings 
a strong clear note is more prized than 
when a helpless thing it chirped and 
fluttered, waiting for its wings. My 
birds are fledged; and I'm half afraid 
they'll leave me all too soon. 

Through school, but not through study, 
Margaret still has her lessons, and Maude 
has her studious hours, but we are to- 
gether just as in the old days. Our 
home is still the same. The sunshine 
slants across the roof of the large house 
over the way and upon ours just as it 
used to do. Papa is now in riper years, 
but Margaret and Maude go to meet him 
as they used to ; Jem is in college, Ger- 
trude comes through the wicker gate, 
and with the sunshine on her rippling 
curls, we cross the meadow, hunting 
cowslips and ladyslippers. Sometimes in 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 255 

sportive mood Maude hides her head 
and laughs a little gleeful laugh to cheat 
me with the thought of years ago ; and 
Margaret fills her hand with flowers, 
with a look of love and reverence up to 
Him who of his boundless mercy made 
this world so "beautiful. 

OompanioQS more than children, shar- 
ers of thought, co-laborers, 'tis sweet 
to hear them talk of views and feelings 
such as we knew of old. They have a 
kind of second youth more lovely than 
the first ; the current of their being -is 
stirred with every shadow on the grass, 
the rippling river and the bird-notes 
calling up sweet echoes in their hearts. 
There are lessons not found in books, 
read by those who know the alphabet of 
God's love ; music, not written by the 
pen of man, and pictures more grand 
and beautiful than ever painter drew. 
The wonders of God's world are dimly 



cjiGoogic 



256 WOMAN. 

understood at best, and those that love 
him not are blinder than the moles, not 
to see and recognize his hand. The 
natural heart loolis through distorted 
eyes, and only flaunting scenes and gaudy 
colors please. God is revealed by little 
things ; hence children draw the nearest, 
spelling out his words of love, saying 
them over and again for fear they will 
forgot. What a pity that we are not 
always children, loving and trusting ; 
ready to sleep and eat and enjoy with- 
out that anxious forethought that tries 
to shoulder all ia spite of what He says, 
"Come, foHow me; come close; lean 
hard.'' The child, half unconscious, goes 
to Him; while we, knowing our guilt, 
hang back. 

Gertrude has found some pebbles on 
the shore, and to her eyes they have a 
strange significance. Years ago, a bare- 
footed, blue-eyed child, she played and 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 257 

gathered pebbles on these very sands, 
while her grandmother, with white hair 
and faltering steps was near her, saying, 
"God has been good, is always good;" 
and then added, as she slipped her arm 
in mine, "could I only know that the 
departed shall look down from his pres- 
ence and see his promises all fulfilled." 
I remember the last sad day of her life, 
and how, when I cried as though my 
heart would break, my mother bade me 
bring the Book, and with her trembling 
fingers turned the leaves and pointed 
me to these words: 

"Lord, thou hast been our dwelling- 
place in all generations. Before the 
mountains were brought forth, or ever 
thou hadst formed the earth and the 
world, even from everlasting to ever- 
lasting, thou art God. Tlie days of our 
years are threescore years and ten ; and 
if by reason of strength they be fourscore 
17 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



258 WOMAN. 

years, yet is their strength labor and 
sorrow : for it is soon cut off, and we fly 
away. Malie us glad according to the 
days wherein thou-hast afflicted us, and 
the years wherein we have seen evil. 
And let the beauty of the Lord our Grod 
be upon us: and establish thou the work 
of our hands upon us ; yea, the work of 
our hands establish thou it." 

" God has been good to me," I said, as 
the golden head of my child rested on 
my shoulder ; " God has been good to 
me !" and the birds trilled it from bough 
to bough, and the flowers rang out a sil- 
very chime. It was the vesper hour, 
and nature, glad and happy, swelled out 
the glorious anthem, "Praise ye the 
Lord !" 

The sun sinks slowly, while waves of 
opal light stream over the meadow, and 
fall with a benediction on the distant 
hills. The flowers begin to fold their 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 259 

and the birds are flying home- 
ward. Gertrude's arm is twined around 
ilargaret, and the blue eyes are filled 
with a wealth of love. Maude is lean- 
ing on my arm, not now clinging to my 
fingers, as in that olden time. It does 
not seem so very long ago ; and the eyes 
that look into mine are little changed. 
Humble as our path is, it has been full 
of mercy. 

"Papa is coming!" and away springs 
Maude. There 's a merry chase down 
the path and over the stile. Papa's step 
is almost as fleet as when he raced with 
Jem. We miss the boy. I cannot make 
his loss real. It seems but yesterday 
that his head was pillowed on my arm, 
his rosy face nestling in my bosom. "What 
a privilege it is to lead these babes up 
through the years to maturity, a work of 
which we can be justly proud ; and very 
humble too, for scarcely could we do it, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



but for the fellowship of Mary's Son, a 
babe like ours, once nourished and petted 
in the same way. 'Tis sweet to be the 
mother of a son whom we can teach to 
follow in His steps. 

Silvery waves of light have chased the 
gold away, and our home temple, over- 
run with vines, is curtained in with pur- 
ple. It is new for papa to place me in 
the chair. At first I declined it : "Eest 
is not for me." "But the girls," he said, 
' ' will never learn to keep house unless 
they once begin. There never can be a 
belter time than when tbey come home 
fcom school, and with their mother's eyes 
keen to detect mistakes; her patience 
and sweet encouragement ; her experi- 
ence a well of wisdom, from which they 
are to draw needful supplies." 

" Come, mother, tea is ready!" and I 
find myself a guest. Margaret is in the 
chair behind the ura. It is pleasant, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 261 

and still I am half afraid I shall grow to 
love this leisure, and thus miss something 
left for me to do. Papa seems not afraid ; 
and the plate of biscuit, white and light 
as foam, wins praise from all. Maude 
begs me to see if her quinces are as nice 
as mine last year. " Better, if I remem- 
ber aright," I said ; and her blue eyes 
dance with joy. "I was afraid I might 
have made some mistake." 

"Experiments may sometimes fail, 
and yet give no ground for discourage- 
ment," says papa, and goes on to show 
that mistakes may sometimes profit more 
than uniform success. We grow care- 
less and forget when all is fair ; but 
when we fail once and again, then comes 
the effort. More and more we strive and 
learn, and at last stand where we aimed 
to stand, butwhere we never should have 
stood had failure not been written on 
our first eiforts. 



cjiGoogic 



High on the list of woman's choicest 
gifts is to be the keeper of a well-ordered 
house. How much we lose by under- 
valuing it — some from necessity, and 
others still through choice, neglecting 
the little things that go to make a home, 
and are only done through love. Which 
of us but remembers the mother's loaf 
and fragrant cup of tea, the table with a 
cloth of spotless white, the china cups 
and plates with rim of gold, the carpet 
covered with a cloth to catch the chil- 
dren's crumbs, the windows shaded just 
enough to give a pleasant light. The 
richest feasts are only found where love 
abides. 

I remember such a home ; and with 
her head upon my knees Maude listens 
as I tell her of the bread kneaded long 
and well, the oven brought to a white 
heat, and the clock at hand to mark the 
time. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 263 

"Your bread was good, of course,'' 
was naively said. 

"Heavy as lead!" I replied; and my 
heart goes back to that first loaf. ' ' Glad- 
ly would I have then given the little 
fund of learning I possessed for so much 
knowledge as was needed to make 
bread." 

" Did you try again?" 

"Once more, and failed," 

"And then?" 

"I thought of a poor woman living in 
a rich man's house, and going to her, 
asked for what I should have learned 
before. 

" 'There's nothing easier,' she kindly 
said. 'I'll show- you once, and after 
that it will come easy. People that 
want to do, can do ; and those that do n't, 
can't.' 

"It was only another way of saying 
that woman's work is best done through 



cjiGoogic 



26i WOMAN. 

love — a eieerful, happy service, just as 
the sun shines. A small thing it may 
seem to have a pleasant room, and a tidy 
well-kept house; but it is not small in 
its effects: home pictures stamped upon 
the heart cling there through life. If we 
would he to our daughters all that moth- 
ers should he, we must teach them how 
to order households. It is not enough 
for them to sit by and look on ; they must 
bear the burden, studying out for them- 
selves, and improving on our plans. 
There is nothing stationary in this world 
of ours ; and even the science of cooking 
does not stand still. 

Besides the dishes suited to our taste, 
a:nd the nameless comforts which help to 
hold hearts that might otherwise go 
astray, our daughters are to learn a 
proper deportment toward dependants ; 
to deal -with them not only justly, but 
kindly. "With an experimental knowl- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



DOMESTIC EBLATIONS. 265 

edge of the service required, they will 
know how to arrange so that it may "be 
easier to perform, and more acceptably 
rendered. Such knowledge comes not 
by chance. As well might we sit with 
folded hands in our attempt to read a 
new language, or to unravel problems in 
geometry. Nothing is accomplished with- 
out labor ; and there never was a suc- 
cessful housekeeper, neither can there 
be, who does not make her home duties 
a study. The tastes of her husband, the 
inclinations of her children, the tenden- 
cies of her domestics, must all be well 
understood and cared for. If she would 
have a happy home, she must make it so. 
But some one is ready to say, " It is 
unjust to make woman so responsible." 
As well find fault with the mainspring in 
a watch, the keynote in music, the in- 
tricacies of a machine that sets all the 
rest in motion. The mother does not of 



cjiGoogic 



necessity do all. Each member of a 
household is responsible in a degree for 
the happiness and the well-being of the 
family. But is not the mother the cen- 
tre around which all the others cluster ? 
Let sickness lay its hand upon her, and 
gloom settles over the dwelling; and 
should death come, too late we learn our 
dependence upon a mother. 

In view of future probabilities, should 
we not aim to educate our daughters to 
understand practically the minuti^ of 
social and domestic life ? Should we not 
accustom them to bear a measure of 
responsibility from their earliest child- 
hood ? Then, if changes come, and come 
they will, they will be prepared to stand 
in their lot. What more lovely, what 
more noble than to sec a daughter step- 
ping into the vacant place, the comfort, 
the support of her father ; the guide, the 
adviser, the patient, devoted friend to 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 267 

younger brothers and sisters? All over 
our land there are such daughters. God's 
choicest blessings rest upon them ; his 
arm is theirs to lean upon. True, they 
may not know here the good they do, 
but they shall reap in due time a large 
reward. 

Again, there are those who are not of 
this stamp; those who seek their own 
rather than another's good ; vain, idle, 
pleasure-loving, impatient of rebuke, and 
not given to learn. Have we not- as 
mothers something to do in this matter? 
Cannot we turn the tide in our own house- 
holds ? Cannot we teach a more accept- 
able way? 

A few years since I eujoyed the inti- 
mate acquaintance of two families ; both 
of them Christian households, both bless- 
ed with lovely daughters, both in circum- 
stances of plenty and prosperity, both 
frequenting the same church; but how 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



unlike in the whole internal order and 
harmony of domestic life. 

The mother of one family sat as a 
queen in the midst of loving subjects; 
everything in her kingdom was amenable 
to law, the law of kindness and love. 
Order was in all her realm, and over all 
she presided with an unaffected grace, a 
charming self-poised manner, that won 
the love and admiration of all who en- 
joyed her acquaintance. 

The other was a woman who loved her 
children not wisely. In their infancy 
she could not bear to cross them. Read- 
ing her Bible, she neglected that portion 
of it which says, "Chasten thy son while 
there ife hope, and let not thy soul spare 
for his crying." Sitting at her ease, she 
flattered herself that, when they were 
older, they would turn of themselves. 
Does the wild horse tame himself? Does 
he yield his will without the bit? Too 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



DOMESTIC RELATIONS. 269 

late this mother saw her mistake. The 
temper, inclination, and passion she could 
once have swayed, grew with years to 
be strong, wayward, and unmanageable. 
Anarchy, confusion, and hatred were iu 
her house ; sorrow was in her heart. 

Is it wrong to think that, with the 
same careftil training, the happiness of 
the last-named family would have equal- 
led that of the first ? Had the influence 
of the mothers been the same, the teach- 
ing alike, would not the result have 
been the same ? If not, why do we find 
in the inspired volume so much said with 
reference to bringing up a child in the 
way that he should go? and why do we 
see the righteous indignation of God 
poured out upon those who refuse to 
obey him in this respect? Eli was con- 
demned because he restrained not his 
children. "My son, keep thy father's 
commandment, and forsake not the law 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



270 WOMAN. 

of tliy mother," There must be a com- 
mandment and a law in every honse- 
hold. 

God's favor is for the obedient. If 
we would see our children honorable in 
the earth, we must restrain and guide 
them in their infancy. If we would see 
them endowed plenteonsly with the spirit 
of divine grace, we must teach them to 
love God's service. Responsible as are 
the duties, arduous as are the cares that 
centre around the mother, if we but un- 
dertake them with a humble dependence 
on God, a cheerful, teachable spirit, 
leaning upon him, we shall succeed. 



cjiGooglc 





XVI. 

"Woman's Work in the Church. 

-^HUS far we have spoken of 
woman's work in the social and 
domestic circle; a work that, 
however important in itself, ra- 
diates outward. Concentrate as 
we may the sun's rays, we cannot confine 
them. The atmosphere is warmed by 
tbem, the earth is invigorated, vegeta- 
tion is rendered beautiful. Wherever 
they go, into the home of the millionaire, 
or into the hovel of the day-laborer, 
brightness goes with them. Woman's 
influence in her own home, although con- 
centrated, is not confined there. Like 
the sunlight, it goes out into the com- 



cjiGooglc 



272 WOMAN. 

mmiity in which she dwells ; goes with a 
blessing, genial, winning, constraining; 
or cold, formal, withering. But it is 
premised that we are talking with Chris- 
tian mothers ; mothers who aim to bring 
up their children and to order their 
households in the fear of the Lord ; moth- 
ers whose little ones, like our own, are 
strong in stature, willing to share the 
burden, dividing the labor of the house- 
hold, and using the time so that a rea- 
sonable share of leisure is the result. 

Living iu an age when the question of 
woman's position in the church is so 
often asked, it becomes us to pause and 
reflect, bringing knowledge and judg- 
ment to our aid, unfettered by prejudice, 
and only guided by the word of God. 
In the sacred volume we find unmista- 
kable evidence that woman's graces blos- 
som into the greatest beauty in the atmo- 
sphere of her own home ; that her crown- 



cjiGoogic 



HEE WORK IN THE CHUECH. 273 

iog grace is to be a mother, intrusted 
with the culture of iminortal souls. We 
have aimed only to show the strength of 
woman's influence in the family; but 
who of us will not readily admit the 
influence of one who has the ability and 
the tact of leadership in the transform- 
ing of neighborhoods and communities? 
Look as her admirers hang upon her 
words. Her opinions are law, her wishes 
commands. Ker manner, dress, style, 
conversation, are imitated by many 
around her. "Why is this ? Simply that 
she is charming as a woman, and wom- 
anly in all her ways. Would you learn 
the spell ? It is in forgetfulness of self, 
and an artless ease that carries with it 
the charm of unconsciousness. 

This transforming influence of woman, 
exerted first of all in her own home — 
winning her husband, her children, her 
domestics by the charm of her conver- 

w™«. 18 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



274 -WOMAN. 

sation, the admirable arrangement of her 
household, the wisdom displayed in all 
her ways— such influence is the effect of 
study, of forethought, and of plan. TO 
admit this is not to lessen respect for 
woman's modest simplicity, or to take an 
iota from faith in her integrity. As a 
■woman, God has endowed her with 
attractive qualities. He has given her 
beauty and a winning grace. Why was 
this, but that she should win by it love 
and esteem? It is her nature: love is 
the atmosphere in which she lives, thinks, 
and feels ; it is the stimulant to exertion, 
the awakencr of genius, the groundwork 
of all that is high and noble in her being. 
The minister studies, that he may 
explain and make clear to the minds of 
men the grand theme on which he is to 
speak ; the orator studies to fascinate 
and to hold in thrall the judgment of his 
listeners ; the painter studies to charm 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HER WOEK IK THE CHUECH. 275 

by his lifelike representation ; the sculp- 
tor studies to throw life into the blocli of 
senseless marble : and should not woman 
study to win by her life, to charm by 
her speech, to reflect in all her ways the 
graces of a pure, noble Christian wom- 
anhood ? 

Clearly as her position is defined in 
the family, it does not appear so exactly 
defined in church work ; and wisely, for 
were there definite and specific rales, 
they might lead to usages in themselves 
inimical to the true interests of the church. 
All that we can now gather is to do good 
as we have opportunity ; the woman with 
a family and the woman without, each 
doing what she can. It is too generally 
true that the great body of Christian 
women have felt that they had little to 
do but to listen ; the younger ones per- 
haps to take charge of classes in the Sab- 
bath-school, with an occasional call or 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



distribution of tracts among the poor, 
leaving the great bulk of the work of the 
church to the pastor and officers. A new 
era has dawned ; gleams of light from the 
primitive church point to a more general 
use of woman's tact and talent. The 
voice of the apostle Paul is heard in 
commendation of sister laborers, and the 
question is asked, What more can be 
done by woman in our churches? 

Far be it from me to^presurae to define 
the exact position of woman, or any body 
of women, in the church of Christ. Nei- 
ther can I see that any definite plan for 
all can be established. "VVe must leave 
it for each individual to use her time 
wisely, conscious that for the use as for 
the abuse of it, she is to give account. 
God has specified certain things, making 
them clear, distinct, and unchangeable. 
There are others that he has left, not 
limiting the performance to any definite 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HEB WORK IK THE CHUEGH. 277 

agency. "We are told to pray ; and while 
it would seem a fitting posture for sup- 
pliants to kneel, there is no doubt but 
equally acceptable prayer may be offered 
in any other preferred posture of the 
body. It is not the posture, but the 
spirit, that renders prayer acceptable. 

The word of God is unchangeable. 
His commands are as binding to-^ay as 
in the apostles' time ; but upon minor 
points the ways and means may change. 
Church architecture is not the same as 
in primitiye times, tbe manner of wor- 
ship is not in all respects what it was 
then ; .but the spirit of worship, the love, 
zeal, faith, earnestness to follow Christ, 
are the same. Neither do we presume 
to dictate as to the appointment of dea- 
conesses. That they have been produc- 
tive of good there can be no doubt ; train- 
ing women for religious service just as we 
train them for teachers and for nurses. 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



For this position only women of the 
requisite age and experience are eligi- 
ble. The mother of a family should not 
be expected to leave her duties ; the 
young and beautiful girl should be ex- 
cused for reasons quite as obvious. 

Work for Christ is broad and compre- 
hensive. "We would not lay a feather's 
weight: upon the conscience of one faith- 
fully striving to work for Jesus ; neither 
can we say this is the way, or that is 
the way. Circumstances of life vary. 
Culture, custom, and experience are un- 
like in different localities. God has not 
set all women in families. From many 
he has taken away the delight of their 
eyes, the idol of their souls, stripped them 
of all and everything to which they could 
turn for support, for sympathy, for love. 
And why ? There is a reason for all 
this. God doth not willingly afflict. His 
compassionate heart is moved by our 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEK WOEK IN THE CHUECH. 279 

tears ; our sorrow is his sorrow. In 
removing those on whom we leaned he 
shows plainly that he would have us lean 
upon him. In depriving us of the work 
that we had thought our own, he says 
plainly that he has something else for us 
to do — something that will better serve 
the interests of the Redeemer's kingdom. 
A sister band of such women is formed 
perhaps, and a world of good they may 
do. Trained nurses in hospitals are 
quite as efficient in the work that is 
theirs to do, as the well-read physician 
or the skilful surgeon. As matrons in 
charge of certain benevolent institutions, 
the admirable homes provided for the 
poor and the helpless, the destitute or- 
phan, and the decrepit in advanced 
years, woman's tact and woman's influ- 
ence is widely felt — her humble, heav- 
enly faith and tender charity permea- 
ting the whole system like leaven hid in 



cjiGoogic 



meal, and binding all together with the 
golden link of .Christian love. 

As years roll over ua, and. new ave- 
nues of usefulness open, we may see the 
necessity for many institutions to fit such 
Christian women as desire to devote 
themselves to the service of the church, 
for teachers, and nurses in hospitals, 
sanatories, and private houses; or to 
exercise the ftmction of superintendents 
in female prisons, asylums, homes of ref- 
uge, aud other charitable establishments 
where their services may be required. 

The most interesting feature perhaps 
of the labor of the deaconess is the re- 
cently developed one of parochial activ- 
ity. It is the reproduction of the labor- 
ers of the early Christian church, of 
whom Phcebo is the apostolical type. 
The duty of the parish deaconess is to 
visit the poor and the sick ; to procure 
for them as far as possible work and clo- 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEK WORK IN THE CHURCH. 281 

thing ; to instruct poor cliildren in sew- 
ing and knitting, either singly or in 
classes, giving a regular account of her 
labors to the pastor. No doubt this is 
an admirable plan, as it is one that has 
already been undertaken by some of our 
churches to a limited degree. But a few 
days since I listened to a letter from one 
of these churches in reference to this 
work, carried on among them, hitherto 
by one or two voluntary laborers, but 
now considered worthy to be organized 
and supported by the church. 

It is not our purpose to enlarge upon 
this system, neither to decide upon its 
compatibility with our forms and cus- 
toms ; but rather to speak of woman's 
work in a social form, as connected with 
the churches. While it is not given to 
woman to " usurp authority," it is given 
her to be the centre of social and domes- 
tic life. The family is the nurserj'"of the 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



church, and the Sabbath-school is the 
intermediate link. The horticulturist 
gives us to understand that the nursery 
requires his chief care. In order to 
have straight trees and a harmonious 
growth, constant care has to be taken ; 
when they have attained a good degree 
of strength not so much attention is re- 
quired ; and by-and-by a general over- 
sight is all that is necessary. 

The family is the nursery of the 
church. The church is made up of fam- 
ilies, the heads of families the mature 
members of the church, the children 
brought into it as soon as they are able 
to understand what love to Jesus implies, 
and what trust and confidence in him 
signify. The great truths of religion 
are nearer children's hearts than we are 
usually aware. Simply to love Jesus 
and to obey him is more readily under- 
stood by them, and far easier to be done, 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HEE WORK IN THE CHURCH. 283 

than by the man of mature intellect, and 
inclinations strongly set in the ways of 
sin. It is a mistake to which the church 
is just awaking, that children must be 
shut out ; at least, that they must wait a 
prescribed number of years before they 
can savingly believe that Jesus Christ, 
the Son of God, came down to earth, and 
suffered and died, to redeem them from 
sin. What is required ? Is it anything 
more than love to Jesus? First love, 
and then obedience. It is not given 
woman in general to dazzle by her geni- 
us, neither to enlighten through philos- 
ophy ; but it is given her to do what 
genius and philosophy fail to accomplish, 
namely, to win hearts. 

Love is the basis of family relations ; 
love is the basis of church union ; love 
is the element of woman's life ; love is 
the atmosphere in which children live. 
A mother's lovo, a mother's influence is 



cjiGoogic 



woven into our very natures. This sen- 
timent is not peculiar to Christian moth- 
ers and Christian families. Alesander's 
mother was a proud, ambitious woman, 
not inclined simply to live in state when 
it was known that she was the mother of 
Alexander ; and in her efforts to usurp 
authority, she was always plunging him 
into trouble. On one occasion, one of 
his chief of&cers and most intimate asso- 
ciates took occasion to speak of this, and 
to advise him so to limit her power that 
she could not longer annoy him. The 
great general replied that, sorely as his 
mother troubled him, one tear from her 
overcame it all. This man, that had lit- 
tle mercy for individuals, and none for 
nations, loved his mother. 

Love begets influence. It is through 
this channel that woman wins ; and when 
her heart is warm with love to Jesus, is 
there anything to forbid the use of all 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HER WORK IN THE CHtJECH. 285 

her faculties of mind, her sweet persua- 
siveness, to win hearts for her Saviour ? 
Must she tone down her beaming coun- 
tenance to an unnatural gravity, lessen 
her charms by using a quaint, unbecom- 
ing style of dress and appearance, lay 
aside that sweet urbanity of manner, the 
charming fascination of look, word, and 
deed, because she loves Jesus ? Love to 
Christ is the crowning grace of woman ; 
it is the perfection of womanly beauty. 
In the room of rendering her less fasci- 
nating, it makes her more winning, more 
worthy of human regard. 

It has been said that woman knows 
not herself until she loves. Doubtless 
this is true ; and it may as truthfully be 
said that woman is not perfect as a wom- 
an, not as noble, not as true, not as lovely 
as it is in her nature to be, until her 
heart is filled with love to God. 

Love in her heart begets a spirit of 



cjiGooglc 



286 WOMAN. 

activity. There is no sacrifice that she 
is not willing to make, no hardship that 
she cannot endure. There is no barrier 
in her way, no obstacle that she will not 
surmount. This principle of love to 
Christ intensifies her very soul. It is 
the fountain from which she draws con- 
tinual supplies; her life is permeated 
by the breath of the Beloved ; and thus 
beautified, woman becomes a powerful 
agent in the church of Christ, an active, 
earnest, working member. 

How is this done? Through her influ- 
eQce as a woman in her home, in society, 
in the street, in the cars. Wherever 
■she is, she is the beautiful charming 
woman, always ready with a smile, a 
word of encouragement, a pressure of 
the hand. Winning hearts for Christ: 
it is her work. Her energies are alive ; 
she keeps it before her ; she has a plan. 
"Go work to-day in my vineyard," is 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEK "WOEK IN THE CHURCH. 287 

the command urging her forwa.rd. This 
is a working age : the mind of man is 
constantly projecting some new plan. 
Every faculty is employed to win suc- 
cess ; wealth, fame, the fleeting honors 
of an hour are pursued with unwearied 
diligence. Viewing life as the Christian 
woman views it, shall she be less active? 
Is it for her to let golden opportunities 
pass ? Gro work, for the night cometh, 
and the account must be given in. Plain 
wise, kindly, and practical she must be, 
building over against wherever she is, 
searching out the poor and the suffering, 
bending over the couch of pain, smooth- 
ing with her cool fingers the feverish 
throbbing brow, gathering up the igno- 
rant and neglected, and telling them of 
Jesus— is not this effective church work? 
Will not such efforts win as truly as the 
sermon from the pulpit, or the labors of 
the chorch officers ? In the names given 



cjiGoogic 



of those who built the walls of Jerusa- 
lem, mention is made of the daughters 
as actuated by the same noble love, and 
actually engaged in the glorious work. 
The church has walls to be built up. It 
may not bo much that woman can do, 
only a brick here and there ; or it may 
be some beautiful frescoes, on which an 
artist is not able to advance more than 
a hand's breadth in a day. Whatever 
it is, let it be her best, and God will look 
on her lowly labors with complacency. 

Not only this. Woman is a doctrinal 
teacher. There are spheres where her 
teaching secures a wide interest and 
makes a deep impression. It is proba- 
bly a mistake that, as Christians, we 
make so little of the humanity of Christ. 
When men preach of him as an abstract 
good, a great unseen power, a glorious 
being whose throne is in the heavens, 
what idea does the child gain? Awe 



cjiGooglc 



HEE WOEK IN THE CHUKCH. 289 

and terror may oppress him, but his soul 
does not open to love. God is to him a 
God of power, more ready to destroy 
than to bless him. But tell him of Jesus. 
tell him of the babe cradled in the man- 
ger, point him to the star, show him the 
wise men as they bow before the babe 
with their offering of gold, frankincense, 
and myrrh ; tell him that Jesus was once 
a chiid, that he had to learn to walk and 
to speak, that he was obedient to his 
parents ; tell him of this, and you awa- 
ken his sympathy, his soul is aroused, 
love is kindled. Show him Jesus at 
twelve years of -age teaching in the tem- 
ple, describe to him the anxiety of his 
parents when they had gone a day's jour- 
ney towards home, and the boy Jesus 
was not with them ; show him that Mary 
felt as you would feel if you should lose 
your little son in a crowd, his little ac- 
tive mind begins to stir and question. 
w™*«,. 19 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



Jesus is reai. The boy can think of 
him just as he thinks of his associates and 
playfellows. Take him to the wedding 
at Cana ; let him look at the water blush- 
ing into wine. Child as he is, he begins 
to comprehend that Jesus had power that 
an ordinary man has not. Show him the 
feeding of the multitude with a few small 
loaves and fishes. Tell him that Jesus 
loved Mary and Martha and Lazarus, 
and that at the grave of Lazarus he wept 
with them. Make it plain to him how 
the stone was rolled away, and Jesus 
standing cried with a loud voice, "Laza- 
rus, come forth." He knows that physi- 
cians are sent for to heal the sick, and 
he also knows that when the sick die and 
are buried, they never come back again 
except at the bidding of Christ. Let 
him understand that Jesus came to earth 
to suffer and to die for him ; and he gains 
a better idea of the power, as well as of 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HER WORK IN THE CHUECH. 291 

the mercy and loving-kindness of God, 
than he could get from any other source. 

Go through with each of the miracles, 
aad you will be surprised at the interest 
manifested bj the youngest child. Then 
take him to the garden ; but remember 
the childls heart is susceptible. You 
must not picture all that Christ suffered ; 
you can only tell a part. There are tears 
in his eyes, indignation on his cheeks, 
his small hands are clinched. "How 
could they do it!" he cries. Aad your 
voice is lost, the tears are rolling over 
your own cheeks, you who have known 
the story so long. 

"We need not fear making too much of 
the humanity of Christ. Not only chil- 
dren, but older persons fail to have a 
real and sensible idea of the God-man. 
They do not think of him as really a man 
as they are. His suffering does not move 
them, perhaps because the idea strikes 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



them that, if really possessed of diviue 
power, he did not suffer. To teach this 
cardinal truth is appropriately woman's 
work. It is the alphabet of what is 
taught in the pulpit, and is not mifre- 
quently overlooked, for the simple rea- 
son that it is believed to be sjifBciently 
understood. A talented clergyman, when 
asked why he did not preach it more 
fully from the pulpit, replied that he 
could teach it more effectually in the 
parlor. 

There is still another doctrinal point 
that comes within woman's domain — a 
plain practical teaching in reference to 
the work of thfi Holy Spirit. A great 
many professing Christians, it is to be 
feared, know little of this. They under- 
stand something of Christ and the atone- 
ment made for sin ; but about the inward 
work of the Spirit they seem profoundly 
ignorant. Kot unfrequently the work of 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HER WORK IN THE CHUKCH. 293 

the Spirit is confounded with the action 
of conscience. The work of the Spirit 
in the heart leads to repentance and 
faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. Satan is 
always ready to assail the truth. Eight 
views on this subject can be dissemina- 
ted in the parlor as well as in the pulpit. 
The Spirit is with us as Christ's repre- 
sentative "until he come." The dwell- 
ing-place of the Spirit is in our hearts. 
We are renewed and sanctiiied, led and 
taught by the Spirit. Prayer, importu- 
nate and ceaseless, is needful for the out- 
pouring of the Spirit. John taught that 
there is such a thing as the baptism of 
the Holy G-host. He taught that it was 
the especial office of our Lord to give 
this baptism to ijien. Forgiveness of sin 
is not the only thing necessary to salva- 
tion. There must be the work of Christ 
for us, and there must be the work of the 
Holy Spirit in us. Christ ransomed us 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



294 WOMAN. 

by his blood ; but the renewing of the 
soul, growth in grace, and preparation 
for heaven are wrought in us by the 
Spirit. 

There are distinctive characteristics 
by which we can know if the Spirit of 
Grod dwells in our hearts as a quickening 
power. By nature we are inactive, tor- 
pid, dead ; we have not faith, nor hope, 
nor fear, nor love ; we are alive to the 
world and its pleasures, but dead tow- 
ard God. The Spirit awakens, reno- 
vates, and makes us new creatures in 
Christ Jesus. 

It is the Spirit that enables us to take 
of the things of Christ and show them 
nnto others. Do we love to do this ? 
Do we find it easy to talk of Jesus in the 
parlor and by the way ? Do we love to 
commune with him as with a loved and 
cherished friend? Do we trust with a 
sweet restful feeling, knowing that a 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



HER WORK IN THE CHURCH. 295 

Father's care is round about us — that 
we have a precious Elder Brother upon 
whose arm we can lean ? Is it our meat 
and our drink to work for him ? 

There are still other points where a 
woman's tact and ability can mould and 
fashion others. Order and system be- 
long especially to woman. Let her put 
every duty in its place, and thus time 
will be saved and work accomplished. 
Zealous for Christ's cause, it is hers to 
uphold the church, and to speak of its 
ordinances and its ministry with honor. 
It has been the fashion of some who pro- 
fess godliness to underrate and attempt 
to make ridiculous people whose Chris- 
tian convictions lead them to adopt cer- 
tain ideas not altogether harmonizing 
with the etiquette of the times, but in no 
wise to be held up before the world in 
such a way as to render the native grace 
and ability of the careless and indiffer- 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



ent only more attractive, by juxtaposi- 
tion with the alleged defects of profes- 
sors of religion. In this way reproach 
is brought upon religion, and the cause 
of our Lord is wounded in the house of 
his friends. 

Besides false representations of Chris- 
tianity, the ministry is held in so little 
esteem that even mothers scout the idea 
of their sons entering the service of the 
church. A few evenings since a mother 
said, in speaking of her son, and what she 
would like to have him become, should 
he grow to niauhood, "anything but a 
minister." "Why so? I would rather 
see my son a good, faithful minister of 
the Lord Jesus, than to see him the 
crowned head of the earth without the 
qualities necessary for that position," 
was the reply. There was a puzzled 
expression on the lovely face of the 
former, but she said nothing. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEE WOEK IN THE CHUKCH. 297 

To help rectify public opinion, and 
turn it into better channels, is essential- 
ly woman's work. Let the young and 
beautiful girl give her Christian friend 
of the other sex to understand that she 
esteems and reveres those who are will- 
ing to make sacriiices for Christ. Her 
opinion will have its influence. 

Not many years since, the writer 
knew of such an instance. A young man 
with more than ordinary endowments, 
and with piety that strongly inclined him 
to preach Christ and him crucified, had 
a female friend whom he regarded be- 
yond all others. Before he could decide, 
he must confer with her. The lady was 
a member of the same church ; but wealth, 
political fame, and literary eminence were 
to her far more attractive than the work 
of the Christian ministry. She could not 
make up her mind to become a pastor's 
wife. Alas for the young man called 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



npoQ to decide between the creature and 
the Creator. His choice must be made. 
It was made ; and to-day he is a third- 
rate lawyer, a brolten-hearted, spiritless 
man. His idol was mortal ; his house is 
desolate. 

The field is large. Every grade of 
mental endowment can be brought into 
use ; the tract distributor, the trained 
teacher, the skilful nurse, and the home^ 
loving girl, according as God has given 
thfem, each in her own place building 
up her part of the wall. God is the 
disposer of our circumstances as well as 
of nations ; not a sparrow falls to the 
ground without his notice. The place 
we each fill is the place that he would 
have us fill. -The question is not how 
great will be the results, but what effort 
we make, the spirit in which we work, 
the self-denial and the love we mani- 
fest. 

iicsbcjiGoogic 



HEB WORK IK THE CHURCH. 299 

That which approaches nearest to God 
is the most natural. To do good, do as 
Jesus did. There was no undeviating 
form with him. We are told that he 
"went about doing good." Neither was 
there any prescribed form in coming to 
him. Some came of their own accord ; 
some were brought iu the arms of their 
friends ; some were let down through the 
roof. To reach him was the main thing, 
to behold him the chief desire — to hear 
him speak, to feel the healing influence 
running through all their members. Those 
that loved him followed him, talked of 
him, were instructed by him, labored for 
him and with him. Is there any better 
rale for us ? 

Again, a Christian woman is in every 
sense a missionary. True, she may not 
be called to leave her family and go to 
the ends of the earth to teach Christ. 
But if not called to the foreign field, she 

iicsbcjiGooglc 



FOE CHILDEEN AND yOUTH. 



Flowers of Spring-liine. Combiniug ai 
luitmotioa in most attraotive forma. One liundred and 
fifty Eogravinga. Quarto Bizn. 

Home Scenes. An elegant email qtiarto for the family, 
witli fourteen photogtaphic pictures, fitc-similes of finii 



Tlewa from Nature. Forty Bcenes in nature and ait 
Finely printed in tint 

Hoars with Mamma. By Mrs. S, E. Dawes of Bos- 
ton, MsB3. Cliarming reproductions of Bible narratiTcs, 
for young cMldren. These pictarca of persone and acenea 
of neTer-foiling interest are sketched by a practise'd hand. 
Thirty-three fine Engratii^s. 

Songs for the Little Ones at Home. Atfractiva aa 
BTer. Beautifully illiistrated. 

LollaMes, Vitties, and Tales. Original short Poems 
for the Children, containing Tales, Songs, and Dialogaes. 
With eighty-four Engrarings. 

Home Pictures. 73 pages. A fine Cut on each page. 

Mj Hctnre-book, 64 pages. Siity-oue EngraringB. 

Fireside Pictnres. 64 pages. With a Cut on each 
page. 

The ninstratfid Tract Primer. The Children's tovo^ 
ilo. Finely niustrated. 



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